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When Can I?

I've received a ton of letters from members asking when is the right age to have sex? Well, quite honestly I have been thinking a lot about that question. I look at in two ways. The first is this: maybe you aren't aware but it against the law for a minor (someone between age 12 and 16) to have sexual contact. Bet you didn't know that, huh? So if you are younger than 16, there you go. It's not legal.

Now, here's another way to look at the question. That is, how do I know that I'm NOT ready to be involved in a sexual relationship? Here's a quick checklist for you.

I Am NOT Ready For A Sexual Relationship If:

  • I don't pay rent.
  • I don't have a real job.
  • I don't have my own health insurance.
  • I haven't graduated from high school.
  • It is against my religious beliefs.
  • I don't have a steady boyfriend or girlfriend.
  • I am not informed about my own health or birth control options/practices.
  • I haven't talked to my mother or an adult about how I feel.
  • I am not prepared for the consequences of getting pregnant, getting a sexually transmitted disease or raising a child.
  • I am feeling pressured into doing it.

If you answered yes to any of the above, you need to back up and really stop and think. I know it's confusing when you like someone, but you're not sure how to show them. Having sex with them isn't the best way to show your feelings. Sex complicates things and it doesn't teach you what having a loving, respectful, relationship is all about.

Don't get fooled by the videos and your friends talkin' - cuz talk is cheap. You are not. Your body is a temple. It is up to you to make the right decisions about it. AIDS, other diseases and babies are all serious stuff that they don't put in videos. Don't be in such a rush to grow up. Now is your time to learn as much as you can in school, get hip to yourself and support people around you.

There will be plenty of time for fun and games. You can have tons of fun without slacking away from your values and goals. So the answer to the question "When can I?" is not right now. Stand up for yourself and what you believe in. Don't let anyone push you around.

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When Is the Right Time to Have Sex?

  • When you are married.
  • When you know you're definitely in love.
  • Not until you are no longer a teenager.
  • I'm not sure.

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

HannahG
HannahG posted in Family Issues:
I agree with the person above ## #### ## # ##### ## # ##### ###### you should talk to a counselor or go to the police about the men.
reply 16 minutes
Hannah728
Hannah728 posted in Friends:
yes a lot
reply about 1 hour
lilymouse385
lilymouse385 posted in Friends:
In theory no one is perfect but.... The perfect friend will understand you even if you do get into fights and will stand up for you always And will stick by your side forever.
reply about 1 hour
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
The only advice I can tell you is to tell a School Counselor or Teacher. As for the Men I would report them to the Police.
reply about 3 hours
cool36
cool36 posted in Family Issues:
my mom punches me 4 no reason . And there r taking me away but i do not wanna go .Their making me go with my aunt but  she is alot worse she brings men we do not even know i the house and they  hurt me and try 2 get me in bed with them and she is always #####. What do I do? I am only 9 . Help please .  :( :( :( :( :( :( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( :sad :sad :sad :sad :sad 
reply about 3 hours

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