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Dealing with a Tragic Death

Grief is a hard thing to get through.
Dr. Janet Taylor
Aaliyah's death was unexpected and tragic.
Courtesy of Virgin Records

Everyone is talking about the tragic death of singer and actress Aaliyah. Her recent death in a plane crash is really sad. Even if you didn't follow her career or know the words to her songs, her beauty and maturity really caught your breath.

There is also the sting when someone young dies, because in that instant life breaks down from freedom to finality. To be able to live and breathe is a freedom and a gift that we all take too lightly. The finality of death may leave you overwhelmed and hopeless.

When something unexpectedly tragic happens it really can catch you off guard. You may question the value of your own life, or wonder how someone deserved what they got. You may think what's up with God if you believe or may not if you don't. But understand that tragic events that you see, read or hear about can affect you and how you feel.

First you may be in denial. Words like "I can't believe this is happening" may reply over and over in your mind. It's as if you're dreaming and can't wake up. You might find yourself talking over and over about what happened. Don't worry - that's natural.

Secondly, you may be angry. You may blame other people or yourself. Anger too is a natural stage that can be worked through.

Thirdly, you may try to make a deal or bargain. You know ya tell yourself "If I'm good so-and-so will happen." You may pray and say that you'll start going to church if this comes through...

Fourth, you may feel really sad or depressed. It may be hard for you to sleep or eat; you may feel hopeless and want to be alone. Everything that you do may be a bad reminder.

The last stage is acceptance. Acceptance doesn't mean that you are glad that someone died, but you are able to move on. In time you will come to terms with the fact that your life will go on without this person. Time heals everything.

We learn about ourselves and other people from what we experience. It's not all good. Take the time to talk to your buds about how they feel about Aaliyah or maybe someone else who has passed on. You can support each other and at the same time feel better.

Aaliyah is gone but will not be forgotten. Think about your own life and what contribution you make to people living around you. You don't have to be famous to make a difference to yourself, your family and your community. Live your life standing for something!

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Comments

nayshon123_2616018
Emodustin21 why hey shot hisself for
commented: Wed Jan 01, 2014

cupcake623

cupcake623 wrote:

My mom died.... She got hit by a semi truck and my grandma died of a stroke and my uncle was shot in battle
commented: Wed Jan 01, 2014

emodustin21

emodustin21 wrote:

My brother shot himself today...and my baby brother died December 21st and honestly im falling apart
commented: Wed Jan 01, 2014

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

GaaraOfTheSand
GaaraOfTheSand posted in Friends:
I Feel like I should paste this here  Always remember this: Someone out there loves you. May be here online or on the other side of the world but they would care that you died. Now please put down that knife/blade or rope or gun or anything and think "do you want things to get better" or "do you want the chance of things getting better to be eliminated. Now let your scars fade and remember these words "I care"
reply about 1 hour
scarlet177
scarlet177 posted in Friends:
According 2 me..... a perfect friend should be..... kind towards all, loving, funny, helping, and some times silly ( a friend shounldn't be ALWAYS serious!) friendly ( of course ), and..................... AWESOME!!!! :D !! I do have friend with all these qualities..... her name is ******  and she has ALL these qualities!!!!!!!! so she is AWESOME, COOL AND A PERFECT FRIEND!! :D :)
reply about 14 hours
scarlet177
scarlet177 posted in Friends:
My BFF is awesome!!!!!!! I know that cuz, she is the only person whon can understand my feelings when my enemies or some other friends tease me badly or when those ppl be rude to me....... :(  . I can share all my secrets to her........ she is Awesome cuz, she is being herself . Her name is ****** ....... and she is my WORLD'S BEST FRIEND!!!!! :D
reply about 14 hours
Alexis7343
Alexis7343 posted in Friends:
I think its really great you posted this, cause a lot of people need it. Adults don't notice children problems. When I was in 2ed grade i was bullied by teens that were like 16. Not only that, teachers can bully kids too. My mom always puts people who try to kill them selves down in awful ways. Every time she says that stuff I am very offended by it cause she knows I have emotional problems but she still like to dig into it. Someone who feels they need to kill themselves needs someone to trust and talk to. I'm so happy you posted this. Cause it is so true!
reply about 24 hours
GaaraOfTheSand
GaaraOfTheSand posted in Friends:
I GONNA go draw
reply about 24 hours

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