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Dealing with a Tragic Death

Everyone is talking about the tragic death of singer and actress Aaliyah. Her recent death in a plane crash is really sad. Even if you didn't follow her career or know the words to her songs, her beauty and maturity really caught your breath.

There is also the sting when someone young dies, because in that instant life breaks down from freedom to finality. To be able to live and breathe is a freedom and a gift that we all take too lightly. The finality of death may leave you overwhelmed and hopeless.

When something unexpectedly tragic happens it really can catch you off guard. You may question the value of your own life, or wonder how someone deserved what they got. You may think what's up with God if you believe or may not if you don't. But understand that tragic events that you see, read or hear about can affect you and how you feel.

First you may be in denial. Words like "I can't believe this is happening" may reply over and over in your mind. It's as if you're dreaming and can't wake up. You might find yourself talking over and over about what happened. Don't worry - that's natural.

Secondly, you may be angry. You may blame other people or yourself. Anger too is a natural stage that can be worked through.

Thirdly, you may try to make a deal or bargain. You know ya tell yourself "If I'm good so-and-so will happen." You may pray and say that you'll start going to church if this comes through...

Fourth, you may feel really sad or depressed. It may be hard for you to sleep or eat; you may feel hopeless and want to be alone. Everything that you do may be a bad reminder.

The last stage is acceptance. Acceptance doesn't mean that you are glad that someone died, but you are able to move on. In time you will come to terms with the fact that your life will go on without this person. Time heals everything.

We learn about ourselves and other people from what we experience. It's not all good. Take the time to talk to your buds about how they feel about Aaliyah or maybe someone else who has passed on. You can support each other and at the same time feel better.

Aaliyah is gone but will not be forgotten. Think about your own life and what contribution you make to people living around you. You don't have to be famous to make a difference to yourself, your family and your community. Live your life standing for something!

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

OwlSalsa
OwlSalsa posted in Friends:
YEs I have been bullied. A lot. People who I think are my friends are back stabbers. They suddenly just like turn on me. I've had rumours spread about me and I was so sad. I hated being bullied. But the best thing to do if you are being bullied is to hold your head high and not cry. Because if you show a single tear that is what the bully wants And it will take you as an easy target and will bully you more and more and more and more. And bullies won't stop until you stand up to them.
reply about 11 hours
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
I would also talk to them and tell them how you feel. If they still say they are signing you up for the membership as a 13 year old and it scares you that much I would just tell them to leave you off the membership until you do turn 13.
reply about 14 hours
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
I think every house has some drama going on in it everyday. In my house my Mom is a divorced mother of 3 kids. My older sister is away at college but when she was here there were yelling matches between my mom and her about staying out too late and getting a speeding ticket. Also with my mom being the only one raising us she has to work full time leaving me to watch my little brother who is 10 after he gets home from school. There also can be some battles that go on there and my mom doesn't want to here it from me or him when she walks through the door after work. I just try to not make it all personal and chalk it up to the stress of everyday life.
reply about 14 hours
american_brit
"Tati-00" wrote:I would tell your mother no. I mean she shouldn't be like a dictator and force it on you. I hardly wear any make-up and my mom loves that.
reply about 15 hours
Tati-00
Tati-00 posted in Family Issues:
I would tell your mother No. I mean she shouldn't be like a dictator and force it on you. I hardly wear any make-up and my mom loves that.
reply about 15 hours

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