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Dealing with a Tragic Death

Grief is a hard thing to get through.
Dr. Janet Taylor
Aaliyah's death was unexpected and tragic.
Courtesy of Virgin Records

Everyone is talking about the tragic death of singer and actress Aaliyah. Her recent death in a plane crash is really sad. Even if you didn't follow her career or know the words to her songs, her beauty and maturity really caught your breath.

There is also the sting when someone young dies, because in that instant life breaks down from freedom to finality. To be able to live and breathe is a freedom and a gift that we all take too lightly. The finality of death may leave you overwhelmed and hopeless.

When something unexpectedly tragic happens it really can catch you off guard. You may question the value of your own life, or wonder how someone deserved what they got. You may think what's up with God if you believe or may not if you don't. But understand that tragic events that you see, read or hear about can affect you and how you feel.

First you may be in denial. Words like "I can't believe this is happening" may reply over and over in your mind. It's as if you're dreaming and can't wake up. You might find yourself talking over and over about what happened. Don't worry - that's natural.

Secondly, you may be angry. You may blame other people or yourself. Anger too is a natural stage that can be worked through.

Thirdly, you may try to make a deal or bargain. You know ya tell yourself "If I'm good so-and-so will happen." You may pray and say that you'll start going to church if this comes through...

Fourth, you may feel really sad or depressed. It may be hard for you to sleep or eat; you may feel hopeless and want to be alone. Everything that you do may be a bad reminder.

The last stage is acceptance. Acceptance doesn't mean that you are glad that someone died, but you are able to move on. In time you will come to terms with the fact that your life will go on without this person. Time heals everything.

We learn about ourselves and other people from what we experience. It's not all good. Take the time to talk to your buds about how they feel about Aaliyah or maybe someone else who has passed on. You can support each other and at the same time feel better.

Aaliyah is gone but will not be forgotten. Think about your own life and what contribution you make to people living around you. You don't have to be famous to make a difference to yourself, your family and your community. Live your life standing for something!

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Comments

nayshon123

nayshon123 wrote:

Emodustin21 why hey shot hisself for
commented: Wed Jan 01, 2014

cupcake623

cupcake623 wrote:

My mom died.... She got hit by a semi truck and my grandma died of a stroke and my uncl...
commented: Wed Jan 01, 2014

emodustin21

emodustin21 wrote:

My brother shot himself today...and my baby brother died December 21st and honestly im...
commented: Wed Jan 01, 2014

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

AlphaT
AlphaT posted in Style:
Wear bigger clothes. Heck, I wear a 2-3 X
reply about 1 hour
DisneyanimeLover
"ThunderSpirit" wrote:Wow. We have more in common than I thought.I had the same problem [except she was a little less mean] and this is the advice I was given. Don't exactly go up to her and say, "I don't wanna be friends," because although she is mean, she still might be hurt. Just don't really make it official, but slowly drift apart from her. Try to meet new people, maybe there's someone great you just haven't met yet. And maybe she's having problems of her own, not like that's an excuse. But in the end, if she does apologize to you, she might be a friend worth keeping, but those insults were pretty serious, not something best friends would do, and you probably wouldn't forgive her. I get that. Thanks for the good advice! I don`t see her often so drifting away is the smartest idea. Although I see her at family parties and stuff cause she is a family friend. I`ll try and drift away from her. If she gets better at being kind I`ll be her friend again most likely. Thanks! 
reply about 4 hours
ThunderSpirit
ThunderSpirit posted in Friends:
Wow. We have more in common than I thought. I had the same problem [except she was a little less mean] and this is the advice I was given. Don't exactly go up to her and say, "I don't wanna be friends," because although she is mean, she still might be hurt. Just don't really make it official, but slowly drift apart from her. Try to meet new people, maybe there's someone great you just haven't met yet. And maybe she's having problems of her own, not like that's an excuse. But in the end, if she does apologize to you, she might be a friend worth keeping, but those insults were pretty serious, not something best friends would do, and you probably wouldn't forgive her. I get that.
reply about 4 hours
DisneyanimeLover
I have this friend who has been my friend for 6 years. And she is so RUDE. She says mean things about me and MY MOTHER. Seriously she says really awful things about my mom like this: "Her IQ is high? Oh she must have took the IDIOT test." And tells me "Eww you wear Disney Princess shirts? Eww you are so messed up!" She always acts better than me whether we are alone or with people. She tries to make people hate me and she tries to act mature and she alway tells me "You should respect your mom and do what she tells you" She is awful. I wanna tell her she is mean and I dont wanna be friends. But I can`t! Its hard to do that when you know someone for 7 years. HELP!
reply about 4 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
As the previous person said, look online. There are very cute clothes available in bigger sizes! Also when you go shopping take a look in popular stores as well as less popular that might look as if they're for older people. Often they follow very similar trends but have bigger sizes!
reply about 8 hours

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