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Dear Dish-It, My Flaws Caused the Break-Up


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

My boyfriend and I were going out for a really long time, when we broke up due to some personality clashes and the fact that he wanted to see other girls. (He said that since we are both so young, he wasn't ready for a monogamous relationship.) Aware that my flaws were what caused the break-up and many other problems in my life, I offered to make a positive change. He agreed that if I could make that change, he would give me another chance. Well, I made that change (and it feels great) and like promised, he gave me another chance. But he won't tell his parents that we are back together. He thinks his dad is going to make fun of him because he didn't stick to his word that he was breaking up with me. I feel like this could have really harmful effects on my relationship with him, pretending that I am only his friend when around them... when I'm not. He is a strong person, and I have only seen him lie once or twice... and usually over really stupid things. But I feel like I am deceiving his parents by going along with this. What should I do?
-Liar


Dear Liar,

First things first. Good goin' girl! It sounds to me like you were listening. You heard what your boyfriend was saying, then you looked to yourself and recognized there was room to grow... and to make some positive changes. So right off, you are a winner! Pleeze, most peeps (Rents included) have a pretty rough time sorting through their own weaknesses. But the ability to do what you have done - it's the stuff that makes great people!


That said, I see some flags-a-wavin'. Your boyfriend pulled the monogomy ace. Hmmm, that one's always sketch, so keep your eyes peeled. On the other hand, maybe he (misguidedly) thought he was sparing your feelings. Regardless, you have to tell your boy that in today's world, monogamy is the simplest and safest answer. So be real or be gone. You don't need to hang with someone who isn't totally dedicated to you - emotionally and physically. So what's the final word - If anything about his relationship with you is cause for him to lie, then he just isn't dedicated. Either he comes clean with his Rents, or it's over.


Liar, you need to trust your instincts... you know deep down that it isn't respectful to you (or your boy's parents) if he's not being real. So love yourself and kiss him off! You can and will do better!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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  • 10 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    carolyna_03
    carolyna_03 posted in Friends:
    Dear dish it, plz help my friends treat me like a third wheel everyday I'm happy but then I'm ether getting left out pushed to the curb or something like that. I want to ditch them but I don't have anyone else to talk to or hang with, I was lonely at school because they weren't there help! Wat do I do
    reply about 11 hours
    Flamesword15
    Flamesword15 posted in Friends:
    Friends are hard to find, I will say that, but it's easy to make new friends:)<3
    reply about 15 hours
    Colorpaw
    Colorpaw posted in Family Issues:
      "Colorpaw" wrote: God yes! My mom would kill me if she found me on this site! -.- It gets annoying sometimes. My dad is strict too, but maybe not as much. I have to keep sites where I have any kind of interaction with people I haven't met face to face a secret, and it gets hard sometimes because I'm on quite a few roleplay sites which obviously involve chatting/interacting with people. I trust everybody on those sites though, but try telling my mom that.     My parents have gotten a lot better since then, but they're still strict about the chat sites and all. My mom is still very strict, but not nearly as much as then. I guess it's because I've gotten older. I'll be 13 in a few days. c: ALSO. If any of you saw my other post, pretend you didn't xD For some reason I thought I'd posted the original forum post. xDD I guess that's what happens when you haven't been on a site in a couple of years, you start forgetting things.  
    reply about 15 hours
    tweenblogger
    Thanks so much.  :love
    reply about 16 hours
    Shannyboo3
    I know exactly how you feel.  I'm going through the same thing. The thing to know is none of it's your fault.  And you can visit your mom or your dad.  You can try to get your mind of it by hanging out with your friends at school.  I feel your pain.   And I feel bad that this kind of stuff happens in life.  But god will make everything better. :)
    reply about 16 hours

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