Kw-halloween-logo-small

Dear Dish-It: My Ex Is Racist

Racism Is Wrong

Dear Dish-It,

I found out my crush told people that he hates white people just to get a rep and get popular. He wasn’t always like this – he used to be sweet. I thought we had something special – I’m crying right now just thinking about him. I'll never get over him. I just know it. I'm pretty sure I love him. Please tell me what to do. My soul has been crushed.

Heartshaddered


Dear Heartshaddered,


You forgot to mention in your question whether you broke up or stopped liking this guy because he told people he was racist but if that’s the case I have good news for you – you are a much, much better person than he is. Not only that, but you did the right thing and there are good things coming your way in the future.


Racism is no joke. Pretending to be racist to get attention or gain popularity is equally as bad as actually being a racist and having real feelings of hatred toward other people and doing racist acts just because of the color of their skin or the country they were born in or the religion they chose to practice. I am so happy that you are no longer with this person. He is a very confused guy and trust me, nothing good would come out of having any kind of relationship with him. It takes someone very sick to pretend to be something as horrible as a racist. I think your friend needs help or counseling.


As for you, I want you to believe me when I say this: YOU WILL GET OVER HIM. It doesn’t matter if you loved him or not and it doesn’t matter whether he used to be sweet or not and it doesn’t matter if you think you still have feelings for him or not. I know nothing anyone says and none of the normal advice and reassurance your friends and family give you after a break up can make you feel any better – they’re just words, and your feelings go much deeper than that. But you have to have faith and believe in a couple of things: that time will heal all wounds and that better things (including crushes, boyfriends and relationships) are just around the corner.


And, of course, you have to have more faith in yourself. You need to tell yourself over and over again, every time you think about this guy, every time you hear a song that reminds you of him and every time you find yourself crying over him – “I did the right thing. I am a better person for doing the right thing. Racism is wrong, no matter what shape or form it takes. It would have been a terrible disaster and mistake for me to keep being with a person like that. I believe in myself and I love myself. I am a good person and the universe always makes sure that good people get rewarded for their actions. It’s just a matter of being patient and it’s just a matter of time.”


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


More Dish-It Advice:

  • Does Race Matter?
  • Understanding Islam
  • Unlikely Friendships
  • Black History Month
  • >
    >

    readers voted!

    Comments

    JennyD

    JennyD wrote:

    Messed up though it was just a crush
    commented: Thu Sep 19, 2013

    talentdancer111
    hard decision to make but you will make the right one good luck :) :) :) :) :)
    commented: Mon Jun 18, 2012

    stunna101

    stunna101 wrote:

    dat cray
    commented: Sun Jun 17, 2012

    there are 6 more comments

    Please login or register to add comments


    like this article?
    Sign up now to get more just like!

    latest videos

    F1070667674359

    Do You Pray? Vote!

    • Yes, but only when I'm really scared or want something.
    • Yes, I pray all the time.
    • No, I don't believe in God.

    related stories

    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    Wuwu2cute
    Wuwu2cute posted in Style:
    Thank you : )
    reply about 6 hours
    Jelly3
    Jelly3 posted in Style:
    Hi, I'm not really into fashion but I can tell you one thing. You can just dress normally, just the way you like! It doesn't matter whether you're a teenager or not. It's also really important to you feel comfortable in your clothes. Remember, your clothing won't define you! :D 
    reply about 7 hours
    Bonnie2
    Bonnie2 posted in Style:
    Okay, so my hair isn't the 'best'. I have 'West Indian' Hair (it's naturally curly) and I have to use loads of products to make it nice when I'm straightening my hair. It then dries and all the softness and grease has gone ( :-( ). That's the annoying part. I would like a few nice, easy hairstyles that will look nice with my West Indian hair (that's all spiky and spidery when it's been straightened) even if it's as simple as peeling an orange! Anything would help! 
    reply about 7 hours
    Wuwu2cute
    Wuwu2cute posted in Style:
    I am a teenage girl, so I'm either supposed to dress colorful or just fully goth. I want to dress grunge. Basically 90's street kinda. My mom gets mad at my cause she doesn't want me dressing all black, I told her that's not what grunge is. So, I am dressing pretty grunge, but I need ideas on hair styles and makeup for this style.
    reply about 7 hours
    Wuwu2cute
    Wuwu2cute posted in Friends:
    Ok, so I have a Best Friend, I used to have 2, but one moved away and won't text me, and the other still "acts" like my best friend, but here is the problem. When I do stuff with other people, it offends her, when I don't reply to her text real quick, in her mind, im ignoring her. IT'S ALSO STARTING TO GET ANNOYING CAUSE SHE COPIES ME. She copied my halloween costume, i was gonna be a character off of american horror story. If i don't share my music with her, she says sharing is caring and she walks off.   Now I understand that this might be social and anxiety issues and she needs somebody to cling onto. But I'm just tired of trying. I need advice : (
    reply about 7 hours

    play online games

    Candy-100

    A great online version of the famous Candy Crush. This is the best game launched...

    Big_icon_(7)

    Have you ever fancied being a ranger like those fantasy characters you love so m...

    Big_icon_(4)

    You run across the city in a car chase with the police officers.

    Big_icon_(6)

    The evil master kidnapped all of your friends!

    Ow_fright_ad_100x100

    Explore the world or hang out with friends in your own condo. Get a unique look,...