Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-It: My Ex Is Racist

Racism Is Wrong

Dear Dish-It,

I found out my crush told people that he hates white people just to get a rep and get popular. He wasn’t always like this – he used to be sweet. I thought we had something special – I’m crying right now just thinking about him. I'll never get over him. I just know it. I'm pretty sure I love him. Please tell me what to do. My soul has been crushed.

Heartshaddered


Dear Heartshaddered,


You forgot to mention in your question whether you broke up or stopped liking this guy because he told people he was racist but if that’s the case I have good news for you – you are a much, much better person than he is. Not only that, but you did the right thing and there are good things coming your way in the future.


Racism is no joke. Pretending to be racist to get attention or gain popularity is equally as bad as actually being a racist and having real feelings of hatred toward other people and doing racist acts just because of the color of their skin or the country they were born in or the religion they chose to practice. I am so happy that you are no longer with this person. He is a very confused guy and trust me, nothing good would come out of having any kind of relationship with him. It takes someone very sick to pretend to be something as horrible as a racist. I think your friend needs help or counseling.


As for you, I want you to believe me when I say this: YOU WILL GET OVER HIM. It doesn’t matter if you loved him or not and it doesn’t matter whether he used to be sweet or not and it doesn’t matter if you think you still have feelings for him or not. I know nothing anyone says and none of the normal advice and reassurance your friends and family give you after a break up can make you feel any better – they’re just words, and your feelings go much deeper than that. But you have to have faith and believe in a couple of things: that time will heal all wounds and that better things (including crushes, boyfriends and relationships) are just around the corner.


And, of course, you have to have more faith in yourself. You need to tell yourself over and over again, every time you think about this guy, every time you hear a song that reminds you of him and every time you find yourself crying over him – “I did the right thing. I am a better person for doing the right thing. Racism is wrong, no matter what shape or form it takes. It would have been a terrible disaster and mistake for me to keep being with a person like that. I believe in myself and I love myself. I am a good person and the universe always makes sure that good people get rewarded for their actions. It’s just a matter of being patient and it’s just a matter of time.”


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


More Dish-It Advice:

  • Does Race Matter?
  • Understanding Islam
  • Unlikely Friendships
  • Black History Month
  • >
    >

    readers voted!

    Comments

    JennyD

    JennyD wrote:

    Messed up though it was just a crush
    commented: Thu Sep 19, 2013

    talentdancer111
    hard decision to make but you will make the right one good luck :) :) :) :) :)
    commented: Mon Jun 18, 2012

    stunna101

    stunna101 wrote:

    dat cray
    commented: Sun Jun 17, 2012

    there are 6 more comments

    Please login or register to add comments

    share with your friends


    Twitter Facebook Myspace Digg


    like this article?
    Sign up now to get more just like!

    latest videos

    F1070667674359

    Do You Pray? Vote!

    • Yes, but only when I'm really scared or want something.
    • Yes, I pray all the time.
    • No, I don't believe in God.

    related stories

    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    BadwolfDW
    BadwolfDW posted in Friends:
    So i  agree with miley15 i think you guys should all meet up and tell them they can't leave or interrupt each other untill the issue is resolved let girl 2 know that the more she askes the less girl 1 will want to be her friend , also tell girl 1 that she shouldn't just run away.  Girl 1 is trying to be friends with girl2 but  i mean they dont need to bff's but they should not make a big deal of each other. 
    reply 1 day
    sugarpetals
    my parents would be around 7
    reply 1 day
    Pink_Kitty
    My parents are very lenient about chores and messing around but they are NOT lenient at all about lying, respect, homework or safety stuff.
    reply 1 day
    miley15
    miley15 posted in Friends:
    ahaaaa...that's sorta confusing and annoying at the same time...but don't u think if they were really your friends they would listen to u? if they are really interested in being friend with u so tell em that u cannot stand this situation anymore and ask them politely but firmly to try to understand each other...or ur friendship will be ruined...i'm sure talking always solves any problems...
    reply 1 day
    avatar-me
    avatar-me posted in Friends:
    Ok here's what's going on. Girl1 (my best friend) can't stand girl2 (my other friend). And girl2 wants to be friends with girl1 but girl1 doesn't want to be friends with girl2. And girl2 keeps messaging girl1 and girl1 keeps telling her she doesn't want to be her friend. got you confused yet?  So this is what is making me write this. My best friend said that if I keep hanging around my other friend she will try to be nice. But every time those two are in the same place girl2 asks girl1 why they can't be friends and that just sets girl1 off. And then I have to stop it. I love how my best friend is willing to hang around my other friend for me but I hate how my other friend won't stop bringing up why the two of them can't be friends. No matter how much girl1 and I tell her that girl1 doesn't want to be her friend she keeps asking. I like hanging out with both of them but not at the same time and when I hang out with one and not the other they ask why and I spending more time with the other one then with them. I can't take it anymore!!!  Please help me me before I loose it,              avatar-me
    reply 1 day

    play online games

    Candy-100

    A great online version of the famous Candy Crush. This is the best game launched...

    1515_gl_kidzworld_100x100_jpg_fz

    Intriguing planets, weird and wonderful characters; challenge friends and find a...

    157262_(2)

    When you go back to Candyland, you’ll wonder why you ever left in the first plac...

    100x100_ra_logo_girl

    Uncle George has left you his farm, but unfortunately it’s in pretty bad shape. ...

    _thumb_100x100

    Shoot blobs with different properies to merge yellow blobs. Your blobs can be re...