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Dear Dish-It: All About Your Period

Lots of KW girls have asked Dish-It questions about their periods. Here’s some info girls should know about puberty, menstruation and dealing with your monthly period.


Discharge & Symptoms

I’m 10 and every day for about eight months there’s been white, stringy, gooey stuff in my underpants and, for about a year, I’ve felt pains in my lower tummy. Does this mean I’m going to get my period? – sexy sc

Getting white discharge is very normal for girls and women of all ages, whether they’ve got their period already or not. I’m not sure about the pains in your stomach, but the best thing to do is tell a parent about it or go see a doctor.


I haven’t started my period but there is something wrong. When I go to the bathroom there’s usually red stuff left in the toilet, My parents said it’s not my period. What is it then? – hidypo12

Red discharge is not as normal as white (or colorless) discharge and may mean you’re getting your period or something else is happening. The best thing to do is tell a parent about it or go see a doctor.


I’ve been having symptoms for months but I’ve never had a period. Should I go see a doctor? – barlowgurl97

If you’re worried, definitely tell a parent or a doctor about it. Otherwise, I’d just be patient – you’ll get your period eventually.


My first “period” was at school. It was stressful and I wasn't prepared. But it was blackish, which my mom said it wasn’t my period. I have discharge and get moody a lot, plus I get pain in my lower abdomen and headaches. I have armpit hair and hair down there. I wear a bra. I carry pads. Was it my period or not? – iko90


I’m not sure – red or black discharge is not as normal as white (or colorless) discharge and it’s best to ask a doctor whether it was your period or not.


Your First Period

I think I might be going through my first period but I'm too scared to tell my mum. The only person that knows is my BFF, What should I do? – twilight_luv

I know it’s hard to discuss some things with your parents but remember – your mom was a girl your age once, too, and she went through the same thing you are in terms of getting her first period. Conquer your fears and let your mom know – you’ll see it wasn’t such a big deal after you’ve done it.


I’m 11 and I started my period. Is that too young? – koolstuff2009


There’s no such age as “too young.” Every girl goes through puberty and gets her period at her own pace. No need to worry!


Telling Your Parents

There's this brown sticky stuff in my underwear and I think it's my first period. I've read a lot of books about puberty, but I didn't read anything that said how to tell my mom! I have a younger and older brother, plus my dad. There's always at least one of them around, so how do I get a private place to tell her? Please help!!! – miufan

I’m sure you can find a moment to ask your mom if you can speak to her alone. Maybe even write her a quick note and ask her to meet you in your room because you have something you need to tell her in private?


I started getting my period early – I’m only nine. I don’t wanna tell anyone because I live with my uncle. What do I do? – princess


You can always tell a female teacher that you trust, one of your friends’ moms, a school counselor or your doctor. Think of a woman you like and have respect for and I’m sure she won’t mind helping you out.


Getting Your Period At School

I haven’t got my period yet so I’m scared it will happen at school. What should I do? – beyoncefan


If you’re worried about getting your period at school you may want to be prepared and have some supplies with you. That means keeping sanitary pads in your purse, backpack or locker. Talk to someone who can help you get your supplies together, like your mom, an older female relative or whoever you feel comfortable with. Make it clear that you want to be ready for the big day whenever it arrives. You also might talk to your doctor when you go for a checkup. Just by looking at you and how much you've developed so far your doctor may be able to tell you, roughly, how soon to expect your first period.


If your first period does happen at school and you don’t have your supplies ready ask to visit the nurse, a counselor or a teacher you really like for help. Just say, "I started my period today and I don't have my supplies." If you don't want to talk to a male teacher or counselor you can just say, "It's a girl thing." He will get the message and find you a woman who can help.


Even if you get help from school staff you also might call one of your parents. If it's your first period, you probably will want to tell your mom or dad what happened and how you're feeling.


It's unlikely that your first period will be very heavy, so you'll probably figure out that it's happened before your clothes are stained. But if your clothes do get stained on your first period you'll definitely want to visit the nurse or counselor. You don't want to be worried all day long that someone will see the stain, so you need some fresh clothes. Maybe you have sweatpants in your locker for gym class or, if you don't have any spare clothes, you'll need to see someone on the school staff so you can call a parent who can bring you some clothes or pick you up and take you home.


What if you return to class with different pants on and someone asks about it? You don't have to say what really happened. That would be embarrassing. Instead, you can just say something like, "I spilled something on my pants so I changed."

Pads & Tampons

How do you wear period pads? – sexysc

Pads are rectangles of absorbent material that you stick to the inside of your underwear. Some have extra material on the sides called "wings" that fold over the edges of your underwear to better hold the pad in place and prevent leakage. Sometimes, pads are called sanitary pads or sanitary napkins.


Pads come in different sizes for heavier and lighter periods. Changing pads often can cut down on any odor. You might wonder how often pads must be changed. It depends on how much menstrual blood you have, but it's a good idea to change pads at least every 3 or 4 hours even if you're not menstruating much. Naturally, if your period is heavy, you should change pads more often because they may get saturated more quickly.


Once you've removed your pad, wrap it in toilet paper and put it in the trash can (or if you're in school or another public restroom, use the special disposal box that's found in most stalls). If you have a pet at home, make sure you throw pads away in a trash can that your pet can't get into. Don't try to flush a pad down the toilet because they're too big and may back up the toilet and make a huge (embarrassing!) mess.


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Have You Gotten Your Period?

  • Yeah, I've had it for awhile.
  • I just got mine recently.
  • No, I still haven't gotten my period.
  • I'm way too young to be getting my period yet!

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Wonderfulcalico
My parents have always been aggressive and abusive and I only just noticed it a couple months ago. Over time they've gotten worse (specifically my mother). Whenever she gets mad she'll yell at us and if she gets mad enough she'll hit and push us around. Whoever we get into arguments it's always one- sided and she always wins, even if she knows she is wrong. An argument we had not to long ago was about me not taking care of myself. She looked at my hair and started to touch it and told me "Your hair isn't soft why is it so dry, it's probably because you aren't taking care of your hair." Then she goes on to tell me that she's going to cut it and all of this other stuff when she knows I'm conscious about me looking like a boy ( Used to get called a boy for having short hair). As the argument goes on, I start to tell her things that she knows she is wrong about. She proceeds to yell at me then grabs me by the face and say "If you don't lower your tone and listen to what I'm saying I'm going to knock you in the head." Then she goes on to tell me she remembers nothing I was saying and that it's a lie. She also hit me when I didn't clean the laundry room correctly and whenever she gets fed up. I'm constantly having to watch what I say and do, because I'm scared that I'm going to end up hurt. She also likes to degrade me and tell how bad I'm doing. She's said plenty of thing like when I didn't have my bed covers tucked in she yelled at me and hit me and I said "Do you expect me to just stand here and take this", and she replied saying "That's what you are supposed to do you are the child and I am the adult, you take whatever I do until I'm done." Another time is when I had my band concert and I had to pick out the right attire. When we went shopping to get the clothing I chose slacks when she liked a skirt better, we went on to fight in the store and she bought the slacks. When we got home she said to me that real girls wear skirts and dresses and boys wear slacks and pants. This hurt me because she knows I have a past with people telling me I look like a boy etc. Another time I started to sleep on the floor, because I was practicing a minimalist life. When I left my pillows on the floor she found it and questioned me on why they were there. I told her it fell of my bed when really I left it there. Later when I told my dad, he told her and she got mad because I was getting cat hair on my pillows. She then proceeded to ask why I lied and I told her sometimes lying is better then the truth (I knew she would get mad that I was sleeping on the floor so I lied) then she told me that I was never going to have a relationship, a job, or friends ( This hurt me because I don't have friends now). She's also said that I don't take care of my body because I ate two sweets in one day which lead her to banning me from Doritos and now I have to ask to get chips and any other snack. She's told me I don't take care of my teeth because I have yellow spots from using whitening toothpaste with braces on. She's told me I don't take care of my hair so I can't wash it or do any hair style or then a bun. She had lead me to starving myself (Unless she makes me eat) and cutting myself. I've just stopped caring, because what ever I do is always wrong. I never get a choice in my activities, she controls my life in fact she me just in a different body. But what is even worse is that she's turning my dad into her. Now I have a scheduled time to eat breakfast and lunch, and to go onto my electronics. I feel like I'm in a prison with my parents constantly watching over me, in fact yesterday when I was pouring my milk my mom got out a measuring cup and poured my milk into the measuring cup and said "Why isn't this a full cup" and I replied saying "Because I don't measure my milk." Then she got angry at me. There's so much I could say about her, but I'll stop. Anyways my father is always sarcastic and he doesn't realize how much it hurts me. Today I was cleaning out my bag for next school year and my dad came in and said, "Wow, you aren't even dress yet and I had to come up here to tell you how sad." Just little things like that hurt me. My little sister got mad at me last week for sitting in a certain area and she said " Why are you sitting there," and I didn't reply because I didn't want to speak to her and she then said, "Probably because you are too stupid to answer." I wanted to break down crying then and there, but I kept it in. I've limited my talking to her, because all she does is break me down. Like when there was a Proactive commercial and she said, "Ha, you need that." That hurt me because just the other my mom was telling me how I don't take care of my face and that's why I have acne. My older sister and I barely talk, because whenever I try to talk to her she's mad for what ever reason and when my parents were talking about hitting my sister she was in the corner laughing. My cat Preston is very young and I got hi,abo a year ago. I get very sad and often cry, because I've seen him turn out scared and aggressive just like me because he's been through what I have. One time he pooped in a clothes basket (It's right next to his litter box) my mom grabbed him by the neck and hit him while she smothered his face in his poop, all while yelling at him. I was going to call the Animal Protective Services, but I got too scared and I realized how lonely I would be. Please help me I'm not sure what to do anymore. Also sorry for the very long post!
reply 2 days
Error101
Error101 posted in Family Issues:
Dear Kkmr324, I hope you get to feeling better as time goes on.  It does get better but like you said you can't actually get over it.  Losing someone to cancer is awful and I have never lost a friend and I hope I never will and I am so sorry that you did, but I have lost family to cancer and it is horrible.  I hope your okay. :(
reply 3 days
Kkrmr324
Kkrmr324 posted in Family Issues:
A few months ago,my friend Kendall died of cancer. It was really hard to "get over it"; because really you dont just get over it. One thing i did was find a bunch of pictures of me and Kendall and remembered all the fun we had together. And it helped! I still miss her, but good friends and family helped with that.
reply 6 days
Kkrmr324
Kkrmr324 posted in Family Issues:
A few months ago,my friend Kendall died of cancer. It was really hard to "get over it"; because really you dont just get over it. One thing i did was find a bunch of pictures of me and Kendall and remembered all the fun we had together. And it helped! I still miss her, but good friends and family helped with that.
reply 6 days
Tennis123
why are you allowing that to control your happiness? why can't you have true happiness instead of chasing some dream for momentary satisfaction? You're 12. This is when your core beliefs, values, and outlooks on life start. Don't mess it up choosing to be sad over something like that.
reply 6 days