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Dear Dish-It, My New BF Wants to Do It

Dear Dish-It,

I went out with this guy for three months, maybe four. We were really into each other and I felt nothing could go wrong. Then all of a sudden he wants to have sex and feel me up... I am so confused - or I was - but I broke up with him. Now I miss him and maybe I should of done it, or at least done something with him. But I miss him and I don't know what to do. He's changed a lot and I think he likes me again. What should I do?
*InoCenT anGeL*


Dear *InoCenT anGeL*,

Stick with your original decision to dump the dude. Sure, you miss him but he was moving WAY too fast for you. I think you need to stick with your gut and move on. He may have changed, but then again, maybe that part of him didn't change. He may think he is ready for sex, but you obviously know you aren't. I mean, there is a lot to consider, like birth control, STD protection, etc. Hold-off on dating this guy again, especially if you're emotions are making you miss him. Missing someone doesn't mean you are ready for sex.


Dear Dish-It,

Well, yesterday a boy asked me out and I said yes. Today we went to the mall and then when I got home he invited me for dinner at his place and I went with him. When we got there his parents had to go to the store, so my new boyfriend and I stayed home alone. A few minutes after they left, he asked me if I would "DO IT" with him since no one was home. I said I would think about it and I still am. What should I say to him and how should I say it?
Cutie2U


Dear Cutie2U,

Firstly, in my humble opinion, if he can't say "have sex" or "sexual intercourse" or you can't say it in an email you aren't ready to have it. Then there is the fact that you have only been going out with this dude for one day. Isn't it a bit soon to be jumping into bed with him. I mean, what do you honestly know about him? Not much, I'll bet. And just because his 'rents aren't home doesn't make it perfect timing to get busy. What makes it perfect timing is being in love, being mature enough to handle it, being committed to each other and being ready (as in you have condoms, you're on birth control, you're seeing a gynecologist regularly and you're aware of all the risks.) If I were you I'd probably break-up with him or at the very least tell him you aren't "DOING IT" anytime soon.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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Dear Dish-It in the forums

hasti10
hasti10 posted in Friends:
Thank u guys :) :) :) :) :)
reply about 2 hours
astucieuse331
astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
I feel like that too! I know where you're coming from, but believe me, I've moved on. Those people? Bleh. Not worth my time, and certainly don't deserve me.  You described me exactly: good with people and friends, but don't have a best friend at all, and others really don't care whether I'm lonely or sad. Well, it might sound crazy, but guess what? I've found a friend in me instead of others. I've learned to accept that you can't please everyone, and that some of the fish in the sea aren't worth wasting your time on. So I've become independent, to learn to depend on myself more than to rely on others. Trust me, it works, and I think it'll work for you. But if you really need a friend, me and @alienincognito are here to talk to you if you need us! @alienincognito: LOL! DUDE! That's HOW I THINK! Whenever one of my friends talks behind my back or backstabs me, I'm like, "Ah, whatever, 'screw em, I'll let Karma take over! I ain't letting those negative peeps ruin my day." Maybe you, me, and hasti10 could start a group where we can talk to each other!  :) :D 8)
reply about 10 hours
astucieuse331
astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
I've always felt the same way. My one best friend gossiped behind my back, used me, all that girl stuff. She took me for advantage and we had a bunch of fights because of her finding a new friend and completely acting as if I didn't exist, and I told her to give me at least some attention every once in a while if she can't even continue to talk to me daily. And.. I lost her. Well, she lost me. We both lost each other. But then I realized.. it's the people that you least expect to be nice to you you'll find kindness in. Why? Based on personal experience, and I'll tell you the story: For my gym class, me and my peers were supposed to make a group for a dance. This was when my best friend had found a new friend already, and the time at which we had a few fights because of that. Of course, I relied on my best friend to count me in her dance group. At lunchtime, I sat together with my best friend, and we ate our lunches in silence. All of a sudden, I brought up the dance groups and asked her straightforwardly: "Can I join your group?" No reply. "Kelly, can I join your group?" No reply. "I mean, since our class is uneven, I found it fair that there'd be a group of five, you know?" None at all. Kelly ignored me straight off the bat, leaving me speechless. My mind raced with thoughts, and I thought, maybe it's not worth having Kelly as a friend. A few days later, we were playing Dodgeball for gym. I was on Kelly's team, and overheard her talking with her new friends about who to pick for the dance group. One of her friends mentioned me, and Kelly said: "Oh no, we shouldn't pick her because _____ (I don't know what she said then)." I was shocked, but was anticipating it, so when the time came to choose groups, I saw my friend, Luke, ask two girls, Cher and Bridgette, to join their group. Surprisingly, Cher and Bridgette actually accepted him, and so I thought, "Wow, if they accepted Luke, they might accept me aswell!" and so built up the courage to ask them if I could join. Even though Cher and Bridgette were mean to me sometimes, I knew that I had to risk it and see what'd happen. Afterall, rejection is just another opportunity to find a better group. Little did I know, it'd be the best choice of my life. They were so happy, and even thanked me for joining them! I was speechless once more; I never knew that the peers that I thought I would never be friends with would actually be my friends!  So yeah, that's what I learnt, and I never regretted learning that fact. Ever since then, though, I've learnt not to trust people as much as I used to anymore. I learnt that independency is what works for me, what I was meant for in terms of socializing or working. But, other things may work for you. If you still want a friend, you can be independent and wait for the right person. However, if you still want a real friend, you can wait, but still mingle (hang out) with other people! I I'm not going to make fun of you because I know how you've felt, just as I stated in my past problem before. But you can move on from those friends, they're not worth your time and certainly don't deserve you as a friend. Trust me, if it's meant to be, you'll definitely find a true friend. But if it's not, you may become like me, finding happiness in my own way. I want to remind you though-- you don't need someone to stay happy, or keep you company. This may sound silly, but you can even have your own invisible friends! I've had one, but that's very rarely for me. It's not silly though if you see the general idea; usually these friends are made from different dimensions of your personality or just because of will. There's a lot more fish in the sea, though, so I'm sure you'll find a true friend that's meant for you  :) Take care, and I hope you'll find a true friend soon!
reply 1 day
ts01
ts01 posted in Friends:
im so sorry you girls feel that way.true friends are there, its just easier to find users because they are more plentiful. dont give up, you will find real friends eventually
reply 1 day
lolflowergirl
lolflowergirl posted in Friends:
i feel alone too
reply 1 day

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