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Dear Dish-It: How To Break Up Nicely

Love & Dating Advice
Love & Dating Advice

Dear Dish-It,

I need to know how do i breakup with my bf without hurting his feelings.

heartbreaker


Dear heartbreaker,


Breaking up is never easy and it should always be done nicely. Even if the relationship is ending, it’s important to remember that the other person has feelings, and may be hurt when you break up with them. Here’s how to break up nicely.


Wait until you’ve cooled down. Many relationships end during a fight; it’s too easy to say “it’s over” when you’re angry. Wait until you’ve cooled down to make sure that you really are ready to break up. If you do break up in the middle of a fight, it can be very hard to make things right afterwards.


Make sure you know what to say. Once you’ve determined that you’re ready for the relationship to end, think out what you will say. Avoid any clichés like “it’s not you, it’s me.” Be upfront about why the relationship is ending. Be honest and truthful, but avoid being too blunt and saying unnecessarily mean things just to cause pain. Break up nicely by carefully phrasing what you want to say.


Don’t put it off. Many people put off a breakup because it can be extremely uncomfortable for both people involved. Don’t act like a jerk hoping that they will break up with you first, and don’t avoid them or pretend that nothing is wrong. Do not tell your friends that you’re breaking up before you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend. There is no “right” time to break up, so stop putting it off until you find that right time.


Do it privately. Never break up with someone in front of their friends or other people. Break up nicely in person, not through texting or email, or over the phone. This personal discussion should not take place with an audience. The considerate thing to do is to wait until both of you have a chance to talk in person alone. Wait until you both have adequate time to deal with it; breaking up on a holiday or just before they have to go to work or another obligation will make it much harder.


Be understanding of their reaction. They may be angry, insulted, or sad. Understand that this is a normal part of the breakup process. Do not be angry or defensive, and do not try to comfort them as if you were still their boyfriend or girlfriend. This can only create drama. Be firm but gentle about your choice.


Give them space. Cutting ties is difficult, even if you’re the one to do the breaking up. Even though you may still feel attached for them and feel bad, especially if they cry, that is what their friends are for. Being around them immediately after the breakup can send mixed signals and offer them hope that you will be together in the future, and it will make it harder for them to move on and meet new people.


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Secret Nickname asks: I have no idea how to break up with my bf without hurting him. Any help??

Dear Dish-It in the forums

FeatheryOne
I'm sorry but if you're not over 12 you're going to have to stay in some sort of limits; do you understand the threats out there?
reply about 2 hours
kuzivakwashe
hi i think we all say our parents treat us like babies. i am 12 years old and i am still mumys baby. our parents will always be there to catch us. sometimes i think i am treated like a baby. i think we are still young to be saying we are now grown ups. i hope that helped
reply about 3 hours
ChickenGoPowPow
ChickenGoPowPow posted in Style:
Well first of all, I understand what you're saying.  You want to be well dressed like them, Am I right? First, it doesn't matter what you dress like.. long as you being yourself. You don't have to be insecure of what you wear because you are perfect just the way you are. Don't worry about how they dress or what they even get. Be who you are. That's what makes you unique. If you still want to just dress up like them or buy better clothes then look in stores or discuss it with your parents an they might just have an idea. You might be younger than them, but at least you are being who you were born to be, which is you. Don't ever feel bad about yourself. Clothes are just clothes. Nothing different.
reply about 3 hours
e_stunner
e_stunner posted in Style:
I'm 2 years younger than my seniors in school.I never really cared about how i looked but when i saw their online pictures i saw how well dressed they were.I started feeling insecure and hating every outifit i wore.I want not to care but i can't.Help me!
reply about 4 hours
heyitsangel
My mom& dad still treats me like a baby too because I have only just turend 13 on september 8th  I just want to be independence too and I do the same  I talk to them and they always say I'm not ready to be independence  and then say I have to wait till I'm 15 or 16.
reply about 4 hours

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