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Dear Dish-It: Bestie Envy

Dear Dish-it,


My BFF is extremely popular, but I'm not. She is very funny, outgoing and a good friend. But sometimes she can be annoying: she gloats a lot and pretends she doesn't care about grades, when I know she does. How do I become as popular as she is?


greenwithenvy


Dear greenwithenvy,


Unfortunately, jealousy is not a very flattering emotion – being envious of your BFF (or anyone, for that matter) certainly won’t help you become more popular or well liked. However, it’s totally OK (and totally human) to feel the way you’re feeling – as long as you work to understand why and what you can do to let go of this emotion so you can become a bigger, better and (if you want) more popular person.


Talk it Out

Talking to your best friend about your feelings may help you deal with your jealousy – it’s definitely easier than holding everything in. If there’s something she does really well that you want to become better at (like making new friends, for example), ask her what her “secret” is – or, let her know that you’d like to be included or introduced when she meets someone new. By talking to her, you may also discover that she admires certain things that you are really good at, like getting good grades. Better than being jealous of your bestie is appreciating each other’s talents, learning from each other and helping each other to improve and succeed. That’s what friends are for, right?!


Be a Better Friend

While you may not have control over how many people your BFF is texting or how popular she is, something you do have total control over (and can make you a better person overall) is how good a friend you are to her – and others. Being jealous is not only unattractive, it’s also very unproductive and won’t get you anywhere, but being supportive and a great friend to your bestie will! People will see what a wonderful friend you are and give you credit for that. Instead of being envious of your friend’s talents, be proud of the things you can do really well, like being a great BFF!


Sound Off

What do you think greenwithenvy should do? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Comments

Gr8fairy

Gr8fairy wrote:

really kitarania luv u 2
commented: Mon Aug 12, 2013

kitarania

kitarania wrote:

i like my bff just right cause shes nice and friendly and i love her name too its funky...
commented: Mon Aug 12, 2013

JennyD

JennyD wrote:

Envy.. though if your friend is popular wouldn't u be because you're her friend?
commented: Mon Aug 12, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

OnceUponAtime143
My "best friend" for two years told me she wasn't coming to my birthday party because she had plans. I told her when the party was 2 months ago and she OK. Now its 4 days away and she says she isn't going because she has plans with her boyfriend. She is my best friend! Shes like my sister! and to know that she picked her boyfriend over me hurts. She is the worst friend ever! What do I do?
reply about 1 hour
american_brit
american_brit posted in Friends:
"animefreakXD" wrote: "american_brit" wrote: "animefreakXD" wrote: guys are the bomb! They're my best friends! I can talk to them like a normal person, but more because you don't have to worry about them gossiping! :D Haha XD You haven't seen some of the guys at my school...  Really, you should just be yourself. Don't try too hard thinking about the right things to say and the right way to act.  That's when you fumble and mess up. Be natural! Be yourself! And relax! You might blush a bit or feel embarrassed, but that is OKAY. I promise you'll survive.  Yeah, guys can be confusing, but they're human too! :) Wow. Shocker, right? :P Talk to them as you would anybody else ^-^
reply about 3 hours
american_brit
american_brit posted in Friends:
"amethystdances" wrote: I know, but its embarrassing. -sigh- That it is, but you'll be okay. If you don't know what to say, sometimes it's best to not say anything at all, you know? We don't all have the same personalities. We're not all amazing conversationalists (I'm talking about you Lex! Thanks by the way. We can always find something to talk about ^-^)  -and no one can expect from us. I'll say it again, be yourself. That's all anyone can ask of you -and if they don't like that... too bad! You deserve nothing more than friends (and possibly a friend? * wink wink * Sorry!!! ) who accept you just the way you are -and love for it.
reply about 3 hours
Teh_Skittlez
Teh_Skittlez posted in Friends:
It might sound condescending, but I really don't mean it that way. Just talk to them like an ordinary person. 
reply about 3 hours
animefreakXD
animefreakXD posted in Friends:
"american_brit" wrote: "animefreakXD" wrote: guys are the bomb! They're my best friends! I can talk to them like a normal person, but more because you don't have to worry about them gossiping! :D Haha XD You haven't seen some of the guys at my school...  Really, you should just be yourself. Don't try too hard thinking about the right things to say and the right way to act.  That's when you fumble and mess up. Be natural! Be yourself! And relax! You might blush a bit or feel embarrassed, but that is OKAY. I promise you'll survive.  Yeah, guys can be confusing be they're human too! :)
reply about 3 hours

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