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Dear Dish-It: Bestie Envy

Dear Dish-it,


My BFF is extremely popular, but I'm not. She is very funny, outgoing and a good friend. But sometimes she can be annoying: she gloats a lot and pretends she doesn't care about grades, when I know she does. How do I become as popular as she is?


greenwithenvy


Dear greenwithenvy,


Unfortunately, jealousy is not a very flattering emotion – being envious of your BFF (or anyone, for that matter) certainly won’t help you become more popular or well liked. However, it’s totally OK (and totally human) to feel the way you’re feeling – as long as you work to understand why and what you can do to let go of this emotion so you can become a bigger, better and (if you want) more popular person.


Talk it Out

Talking to your best friend about your feelings may help you deal with your jealousy – it’s definitely easier than holding everything in. If there’s something she does really well that you want to become better at (like making new friends, for example), ask her what her “secret” is – or, let her know that you’d like to be included or introduced when she meets someone new. By talking to her, you may also discover that she admires certain things that you are really good at, like getting good grades. Better than being jealous of your bestie is appreciating each other’s talents, learning from each other and helping each other to improve and succeed. That’s what friends are for, right?!


Be a Better Friend

While you may not have control over how many people your BFF is texting or how popular she is, something you do have total control over (and can make you a better person overall) is how good a friend you are to her – and others. Being jealous is not only unattractive, it’s also very unproductive and won’t get you anywhere, but being supportive and a great friend to your bestie will! People will see what a wonderful friend you are and give you credit for that. Instead of being envious of your friend’s talents, be proud of the things you can do really well, like being a great BFF!


Sound Off

What do you think greenwithenvy should do? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Comments

Gr8fairy

Gr8fairy wrote:

really kitarania luv u 2
commented: Mon Aug 12, 2013

kitarania

kitarania wrote:

i like my bff just right cause shes nice and friendly and i love her name too its funky gr8fairy
commented: Mon Aug 12, 2013

JennyD

JennyD wrote:

Envy.. though if your friend is popular wouldn't u be because you're her friend?
commented: Mon Aug 12, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Its_skylar1
Hey love , I do the exact same thing as you , you aren't alone... if you ever need anyone , I am here , okay? 
reply about 2 hours
jordand08
Talk to someone, anyone you trust.
reply about 3 hours
jordand08
I don't see that being an "issue" also, you can't always get what you want. AND, it's VERY close to Christmas.
reply about 3 hours
Brianna09
I get told NO all the time by my mom.
reply about 7 hours
kitcat165
kitcat165 posted in Friends:
well this is kind of a long story but ill try to make it as short as possible. so it all started about 4 years ago. this new boy came to my school. he was super cute and all the girls had a crush on him. at first i did not like him in a crush way but after a while feelings started growing. we started talking and he seemed to like me to. after elementary was done we ended up going to the same middle school.fast forward to this year me and him are in the same class. while i was in 6th grade i found my best friend me and her been bffs since then. she is also in the same class. ever since the begging of this year they grew really close. they are always talking and it seems like she like him and vice versa. every time they are together i feel this overwhelming since of jealousy and anger. like is she better than me or??? the thing that really gets to me is that she knew i liked him. omg i need advice like what should i do :mad
reply about 13 hours

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