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Dear Dish-It, I Dated My Karate Teacher

Dear Dish-It,

I can't seem to stop arguing! I just can't stop arguing and I know it's mainly my fault. Is there a way I can just shut up before I start arguing?
A_the_Arguer

Dear A_the_Arguer,

Yep. There is something that can help you "just shut up" it's called thinking. And another way is to control your temper. You're gonna realize that lots of people, things, situations, etc. irk you but you can't blow up about all of them. It takes too much energy, too much time, and quite frankly, it doesn't make you all that much fun to be around. Next time someone does or says something that ticks you off - or that you don't agree with or whatever - take a minute and ponder it in your head. Decide whether it's really all that important to your life and your well-being to explain to whoever that they're wrong and you're right. Sometimes, it's just easier to keep it to yourself.

Dear Dish-It,

I don't know how to kiss.
googleyeyes

Dear googleyeyes,

Yes, you do. See, here's the beauty of kissing... there is no "right" or "wrong" way to do it. Sure, people have preferences - some like long slobbery kisses and some like short non-slobbery kisses or short slobbery kisses or whatever - but it's not brain surgery. Do you have lips? That's really the only requirement. (Although minty-fresh breath is a definite plus!) You'll also find out that kissing is different with every person you do it with. Again, it's cuz everybody has their own style. You'll develop your style over time. My tips to you, as a newbie, would be try not to knock noses, close your eyes (cuz it's uncomfortable to stare at someone that close-up) and aim for the lips. Good luck!

Dear Dish-It,

I am 15 and I'm at boarding school. I don't see my mum a lot so we tend to tell each other a lot when we see each other. I recently dated a guy who was a few years older than me - he was 18 and my karate trainer. I told mum because we tell each other everything. She got really mad and wouldn't talk to me for a week! When we broke up, she was happy that I was a bit mad with him. When we started talking again she got angry, called his boss and banned us from talking. I often catch him staring at me and he flirts a lot but he was the one who broke it off. I don't know what to do! I think he still likes me but how can I go out with him without my parents or his boss finding out? PLEASE HELP.
Candy

Dear Candy,

You can't go out with him again - at least not behind your 'rents back. It's just not a cool thing to do. Judging by what you've told me, I would guess that he does still like ya and was forced to end it by pressure from your 'rents and his boss. Which, kudos for him, was the right thing to do. He respects your parents wishes and that's cool. I think you need to talk with your mum and figure out what her biggest issues are with this relationship. Is it that he is older than you? Is it that he's your "teacher?" Is it both? You say you guys are tight, so next time you see your mum, have a heart-to-heart about this. Explain to her how much you like him and how much fun you have with him and see if there is any way you can get her approval. If you can't, you probably need to let it go until your a bit older and then try to talk to her again.

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to here. But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share, We'll dish 'em up, too.

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6 Comments

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Poll-4

Have You Had Your First Kiss?

  • Yeah, like a million years ago!
  • No, I'm too nervous to kiss anyone.
  • No, I'm waiting for the right person.
  • Yeah, it was awful!

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

SmartSunnyShadow
I have one so annoying sister, that it feels like I have 200 of them, oh my god. She's pounding on the door right now, HELP! 
reply about 11 hours
SmartSunnyShadow
Dad, obviously. I can't even explain what he does to me!
reply about 11 hours
SmartSunnyShadow
Well, if they are your BFFs, they shouldn't be teasing you to make you feel bad. Me, and my BFFs tease each other all the time playfully, but I understand that this is different, and if it's making you feel bad it isn't playful at all.   Maybe your eldest friend is having some trouble with family issues, bad grades, body changes, etc. It's okay to be angry, so maybe you should leave her space for a few days, and see if it turns better. If it isn't, then try to first make her calm down. Then, make her talk to you about why she is so angry and ask if you can try to help. If nothing turns out better, tell her that you feel uncomfortable, and you want her to talk to you.  For your 3rd eldest friend, support her as much as possible, and stand up for her in this terrible situation. If you are all BFFs, then you should all be very close and comfortable around each other, and the fight shouldn't last long. If not, they are not your real friends, and you have to go on without them. I have tons of advice on how to make new friends, so just ask me if you want to know. Your 2nd eldest friend seems to be the main problem.  First of all, tell her to stop, and say how you don't like her bullying you. You must say what she is doing wrong, and how it makes you feel. If she doesn't care, tell her you're serious, and you hate what she is doing to you. If it continues, ignore what trash she is saying, and just simply walk away. Focus on other things that will help make you feel better. Remember, all she is is a person, and it's up to you to act appropriately.  Stay positive, and calm. Focus on other things, and if she continues, tell her that you can all be friends and you miss her. Go get another friend to stand up with you, and tell her that you will report to an adult if she won't stop. She may be your friend, but she deserves it. I told on my BFF when she was mean, so it's all okay now.  If all else fails, get a trusted adult, and hang out with nicer friends. Your other friends will learn from their mistakes. If not, warn them, and give them a sincere kindness note of how you miss being friends. Then, also give one to the bully.
reply about 11 hours
AnnaOfExquizurd
Yeah, @CyclonicBass the best option really is to find a girl with a quirky personality. Become friends with her. Possibly, over time, she'll grow close to you and accept a request to be with you. Hope it goes well!
reply 1 day
drowning
You go out and you find someone who you can be you with. It's not a hard question to find the answer too.
reply 1 day