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Dear Dish-It: I Like My BFF’s Crush

Dear Dish-It,

My BFF has a huge crush on this cool and cute guy, but I think he likes me. I’m starting to crush on him, too, but I’m scared it will ruin my friendship with my BFF. I feel so guilty … what should I do? I need them both!

jojo

Dear jojo,

First thing’s first: don’t beat yourself up for having feelings for someone. I know this is a tough situation, but when you like someone, you like someone. If this guy was your BFF’s boyfriend … that would be a different story. But who’s to say you and your friend can’t crush on the same guy at the same time?!

Decisions, Decisions

Once you come to term with your feelings, it’s time to make a decision. The fact is, if you end up going for this guy, there’s a chance it could ruin your friendship with your BFF. The decision you need to make should center around this question: is this guy really worth losing your best friend over? If he is, then it’s time to get real and get honest with everyone – including yourself – and reveal your feelings. Whatever you do, don’t try and hide this from your BFF; the results of lying could be disastrous.

Keeping Your BFF

If you decide that no, this guy is NOT worth losing your friendship over, then you have to stop hanging out with him, stop spending time with him and try to avoid seeing him as much as possible. You may or may not want to tell your BFF what happened; if you think it will do more harm than good, you may not want to say anything and just work on moving on from your crush.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for jojo? Leave your comment below!

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Comments

lonnie123

lonnie123 wrote:

No not anymore I'm done with crushes for now until I can fine the one .
commented: Sat Aug 23, 2014

MuGhaL41

MuGhaL41 wrote:

:p :p
commented: Mon Apr 07, 2014

brandy880

brandy880 wrote:

my bff is my dog#lonerlife
commented: Mon Dec 30, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

XxIHateMathxX
XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
I like Harry Potter too.  :)
reply 30 minutes
young fee
young fee posted in Friends:
I think you can not be sure he likes you. take me as an example theres this girl in my class who i talk to everyday. Now i see her as a sister and i have and will go to lengths just to make sure shes okay and her boyfriend doesnt hurt her. This might be what is happening in your situation so i advice that you wait a bit longer because him loooking at you may mean that he likes you and is waiting for the right time to tell you. Meanwhile you can get closer to him and flirt once in a while to asure that him you also like him (that is if he isnt sure). And dont worry if he doesnt like you back its better to have a friend who cares about you than a boyfriend who doesnt like you that much and is dreaming about someone else.
reply about 1 hour
heyitsangel
heyitsangel posted in Style:
Both
reply about 9 hours
InternetOwl
What part of it are you scared of? Is it eating in public and around other people, or just eating in general?  What it might be, if it's eating in public you don't like, is social anxiety, or social phobia. You should ask your doctor to check, because if it is, they can offer you ways to help. For instance, they might recommend therapists or group sessions to help ease your fear.  Even if it's just a phobia or, in unlikelier circumstances, an eating disorder, you should still go to your doctor or a therapist so you can try to overcome it. Try doing things that calm you down before these situations as well, like exercise, reading or listening to music (I'm not sure what relaxes you but sometimes these help). Also, you should try to slowly get used to the situations. So don't force yourself to eat straight away when you're out, but slowly start doing so whenever your comfortable with doing so. Unlike your mum wants, you can't just "stop" being scared because that's not how it works.  But right now, please don't force yourself into any of these situations. It's not good for your mental health to be forced to face a phobia of yours often. 
reply about 10 hours
ElfyKathy
Dear Dish-It, Within the last few years I have felt a bit sick and shaky when we go out to eat. It's not so bad when it's a carvery lunch or something at a pub, but settling down for a chocolate brownie and a milkshake shakes me up. Don't get me wrong, I love going out with Mum, but it's just sitting down and taking a bite. I want to chuck it in the bin. I love eating brownies and stuff at home and I'm pretty healthy. But I refuse to go to the town before lunch in fear. Mum told me I got to stop this or I'm going to develop a terrible phobia.  Please help! ElfyKathy, worried
reply about 10 hours

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