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Dear Dish-It, My Friend Is Being Abused


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

I have a friend whose parents abuse her. I know this cuz she is my best friend and she tells me everything. I also know, for a fact, that she wouldn't lie about something this serious. I've already told her to talk to the school counsellor, but she won't. She made me promise not to tell anyone but I feel like it's my duty as a friend to make sure she's alright. She acts as if it's no big deal but I know she's hurtin' inside.
Confused


Dear Confused,

Well, first off let me tell ya what an incredible friend you are. I think your bud is very lucky to have someone like you on her side. Also, you've done the right thing so far. It's important you let her know you're there for her and you are kinda trying to push her into talking to someone. Now, there are lots of kinds of abuse and I am not sure if your friend is being abused sexually, physically, emotionally or another way. In the end, each kind of abuse is horrible and needs to be stopped as soon as possible.


Since she's not ready to chat face-to-face with a counsellor, you might want to recommend some of the more anonymous ways, like web sites and help lines. There is a good one called www.childhelpusa.org that has advice and toll-free digits she can call. There is also the National Child Abuse Hotline, 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453,) which your friend can call 24 hours a day for help and advice - and no one has to know who she is or where she's from or anything.


If she's into reading, there are lots of books on this subject as well. Two books recommended for teens coping with abuse are When Parents Have Problems: A Book for Teens and Older Children With an Abusive, Alcoholic, or Mentally Ill Parent by Susan B. Miller and Dealing With Difficult Parents: And With Parents in Difficult Situations by Todd Whitaker and Douglas J. Fiore. Both reads are available at www.amazon.com The most important thing for you to keep doing is encouraging her to get help and supporting her. If you feel that her life is in danger, it doesn't matter what you promised her, you need to tell your 'rents and get her away from her parents.


Dear Dish-It,

I hate my cousin so much!! I've talked to my parents about sending her far away to Alaska and they said no! Here's the problem... I'm a big B2K maniac and when they first came out, my sister was hatin' on them. She'd be talkin' bout how they're ugly, they can't dance or sing, blah, blah, blah! Then, when the video for Why I Love U came out, she's all over them like gravy on a biscuit! Now everytime there on TV, she puts a tape in the VCR and records it. She also bought a poster of J-Boog!!! But, when I ask her if she likes B2K, she's all like, no?! She acts like I'm the stupidest person in the world and I can't find out what she does! Man, I hate her so much! What should I do?
~*~Queen~*~


Dear ~*~Queen~*~,

Gee, are you a B2K fan? Now, your sis/cuz (not sure which she is because you start off saying cousin and then switch to sister,) started off dissin' your fave group, and now secretly has a thing for 'em. Right? Okay... so what? No offense, ~*~Queen~*~, but there are a million people who have a thing for J-Boog and B2K. She's probably just lying about liking 'em because she's embarassed. Maybe her friends don't like them or something. I love *NSYNC but no one I know does, so I was a lil' shy about tellin' my peeps at first. It could be like that for your sis/cuz. Or, she could just like how crazy it makes you when she denies it. Either way, you just need to chill and forget about whether she likes B2K or not. Just forget about Alaska, enjoy your own B2K obsession and ignore hers.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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  • 42 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    carolyna_03
    carolyna_03 posted in Friends:
    Dear dish it, plz help my friends treat me like a third wheel everyday I'm happy but then I'm ether getting left out pushed to the curb or something like that. I want to ditch them but I don't have anyone else to talk to or hang with, I was lonely at school because they weren't there help! Wat do I do
    reply about 3 hours
    Flamesword15
    Flamesword15 posted in Friends:
    Friends are hard to find, I will say that, but it's easy to make new friends:)<3
    reply about 7 hours
    Colorpaw
    Colorpaw posted in Family Issues:
      "Colorpaw" wrote: God yes! My mom would kill me if she found me on this site! -.- It gets annoying sometimes. My dad is strict too, but maybe not as much. I have to keep sites where I have any kind of interaction with people I haven't met face to face a secret, and it gets hard sometimes because I'm on quite a few roleplay sites which obviously involve chatting/interacting with people. I trust everybody on those sites though, but try telling my mom that.     My parents have gotten a lot better since then, but they're still strict about the chat sites and all. My mom is still very strict, but not nearly as much as then. I guess it's because I've gotten older. I'll be 13 in a few days. c: ALSO. If any of you saw my other post, pretend you didn't xD For some reason I thought I'd posted the original forum post. xDD I guess that's what happens when you haven't been on a site in a couple of years, you start forgetting things.  
    reply about 7 hours
    tweenblogger
    Thanks so much.  :love
    reply about 8 hours
    Shannyboo3
    I know exactly how you feel.  I'm going through the same thing. The thing to know is none of it's your fault.  And you can visit your mom or your dad.  You can try to get your mind of it by hanging out with your friends at school.  I feel your pain.   And I feel bad that this kind of stuff happens in life.  But god will make everything better. :)
    reply about 8 hours

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