Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-It: I'm Jealous of My Ex's New Girlfriend

Dear Dish-It,

I don’t like my ex-boyfriend anymore, but when he started dating another girl I felt jealous. Is this normal?

Jealous

Dear Jealous,

Moving on after a break up can be tough. It’s especially tough when you have to watch your ex move on before you. Even if you no longer want to be with your ex and you don’t have the same feelings you once had for him, it still takes time to forget the connection you shared.

Moving On

Seeing your ex with another girl is probably triggering feelings for jealousy because you’re eager to move on yourself. You have to keep in mind that dwelling on the past isn’t going to help you move forward. Your ex is his own person and wants to move on with his life just as much as you do. Consider if the roles were reversed and he were watching you date a new guy. He’d likely be feeling just as jealous.

The Adjustment Period

There’s an adjustment period after a break up that takes time and, sometimes, several waves of heartbreak. You both have to get used to being out of each other’s lives in order to make space for someone new. If you go to the same school or hang in the same social circles, this will definitely be more challenging. Even if your break up ended on good terms and you want your ex to be happy, seeing him with a new girl will instantly trigger a pang of jealousy. At least at first. But over time it will slowly go away as your memories become distant and your feelings fade out for good. It just takes time.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Jealous? Leave your comment below!

 

latest videos

F1070304393734

Are You A Jealous Person?

  • Yeah, I tend to get jealous a lot.
  • Not really. It's rare that I feel jealous about something.
  • No way! Getting jealous is such a waste of time.
  • I don't know.

related stories

Micro_deardish-comparingbfs-micro
Confused asks: I have a new boyfriend who I like very much. But when I’m with him, I can’t help c...
Micro_bff1_micro
bubblegumkisses asks: "My second best friend is still dating my ex. But I still have very strong ...
How do you get a boy that dumped you once to like you again?
Feeling heartbroken? Pop in some of these anti-love songs that are all about break-ups, cheaters ...

Dear Dish-It in the forums

-Gwen9--
-Gwen9-- posted in Friends:
"jordand08" wrote:Thank you.You're welcome. :)
reply about 8 hours
donteatcarrots
talk to the person you're closest too. yes, you said you don't get close with people, but there's probably one person who you speak to more often than others- talk to that person.
reply about 10 hours
donteatcarrots
donteatcarrots posted in Friends:
Don't worry too much- it's only your first relationship- but I'd sit down with him at one point, and discuss what makes you uncomfortable, eg; if you know what I mean...
reply about 10 hours
donteatcarrots
donteatcarrots posted in Friends:
Probably sound a little stereotypical, but the majority of boys don't really act like that... Ask him :p
reply about 10 hours
kittenkid
First: WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T KILL YOUSELF! When you get past this you'll be glad. Well, this is just my opinion, but I think you should first find someone, anyone, even if you don't trust them, if there're your parents talk to them about it. I bet a bunch of people have already told you this but there're right. Before you walk up to them, write down what you're going to say and then think of a few questions they might ask and write down the answers to them. Remember to tell them that it might take you a minute to think of an answer. Before you answer, think of the exact words you will say  before you say anything, and think in your mind about it. Think about wether it is a lie or not before you say it. If it gets out of you mouth before you realize it is a lie, don't be afraid to say so and just say the truth. Also, just try to find something you like to do that will take your mind off everything. If you really can't think of anything, try just practicing saying your feelings to yourself, or a pillow or something.  Hope this helps!
reply about 12 hours

play online games