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Dear Dish-It: I'm Jealous of My Ex's New Girlfriend

Dear Dish-It,

I don’t like my ex-boyfriend anymore, but when he started dating another girl I felt jealous. Is this normal?

Jealous

Dear Jealous,

Moving on after a break up can be tough. It’s especially tough when you have to watch your ex move on before you. Even if you no longer want to be with your ex and you don’t have the same feelings you once had for him, it still takes time to forget the connection you shared.

Moving On

Seeing your ex with another girl is probably triggering feelings for jealousy because you’re eager to move on yourself. You have to keep in mind that dwelling on the past isn’t going to help you move forward. Your ex is his own person and wants to move on with his life just as much as you do. Consider if the roles were reversed and he were watching you date a new guy. He’d likely be feeling just as jealous.

The Adjustment Period

There’s an adjustment period after a break up that takes time and, sometimes, several waves of heartbreak. You both have to get used to being out of each other’s lives in order to make space for someone new. If you go to the same school or hang in the same social circles, this will definitely be more challenging. Even if your break up ended on good terms and you want your ex to be happy, seeing him with a new girl will instantly trigger a pang of jealousy. At least at first. But over time it will slowly go away as your memories become distant and your feelings fade out for good. It just takes time.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Jealous? Leave your comment below!

 

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HannahG posted in Friends:
Maybe they're trying a little too hard to impress you. Maybe they're desperate for a friend and don't want to lose you so they're trying to please you. Just calmly ask them if they could stop trying to be exactly like you and instead be themselves, because people like to be friends who are themselves. Good luck! -HannahG
reply about 4 hours
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HannahG posted in Friends:
Hey, just move on. If she/he can't see what a great person you are, then they don't deserve you. You're an amazing person and if they believe differently, then they don't have a clue about what they're missing. -HannahG
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HannahG posted in Friends:
Look, I know that it's bad what she did. It's wrong. But there's nothing you can do about that. Let her live her own life, the best thing to do is just leave it alone. If she wants to take care of a child, she'll deal with the consequences. She makes her own decisions, so if that's what she wants then you shouldn't interfere with it. Forget her. Just don't make the same mistake. I know some girls out there believe that their boyfriend totally loves them, and if they have ########### they'll love their girl even more. That's not always the truth. They always say it's not gonna be me, I'm not gonna make the same mistake, my boyfriend loves me no matter what, and they turn out wrong. That's the end of my rant. Just leave her alone, you'll be better off. -HannahG
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