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Dear Dish-It: I'm Jealous of My Ex's New Girlfriend

Dear Dish-It,

I don’t like my ex-boyfriend anymore, but when he started dating another girl I felt jealous. Is this normal?

Jealous

Dear Jealous,

Moving on after a break up can be tough. It’s especially tough when you have to watch your ex move on before you. Even if you no longer want to be with your ex and you don’t have the same feelings you once had for him, it still takes time to forget the connection you shared.

Moving On

Seeing your ex with another girl is probably triggering feelings for jealousy because you’re eager to move on yourself. You have to keep in mind that dwelling on the past isn’t going to help you move forward. Your ex is his own person and wants to move on with his life just as much as you do. Consider if the roles were reversed and he were watching you date a new guy. He’d likely be feeling just as jealous.

The Adjustment Period

There’s an adjustment period after a break up that takes time and, sometimes, several waves of heartbreak. You both have to get used to being out of each other’s lives in order to make space for someone new. If you go to the same school or hang in the same social circles, this will definitely be more challenging. Even if your break up ended on good terms and you want your ex to be happy, seeing him with a new girl will instantly trigger a pang of jealousy. At least at first. But over time it will slowly go away as your memories become distant and your feelings fade out for good. It just takes time.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Jealous? Leave your comment below!

 

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Are You A Jealous Person?

  • Yeah, I tend to get jealous a lot.
  • Not really. It's rare that I feel jealous about something.
  • No way! Getting jealous is such a waste of time.
  • I don't know.

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I totally feel the same way. The one guy I thought was interested friend-zoned me, so I've been kind of closed to relationships. One thing I've learned is not to jump into a relationship just because everyone else is. Just think, in 20 years they'll have all these bad memories of their many relationships, and you'll learn from their mistakes. Wanting to be in a relationship doesn't make you desperate either. You just feel a little left out. Trust me, I've been there. Don't feel alone. Being single, well, sucks, but don't worry, we've got your back, and I just know there's someone out there waiting to meet you.
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