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Dear Dish-It: I'm Jealous of My Ex's New Girlfriend

Dear Dish-It,

I don’t like my ex-boyfriend anymore, but when he started dating another girl I felt jealous. Is this normal?

Jealous

Dear Jealous,

Moving on after a break up can be tough. It’s especially tough when you have to watch your ex move on before you. Even if you no longer want to be with your ex and you don’t have the same feelings you once had for him, it still takes time to forget the connection you shared.

Moving On

Seeing your ex with another girl is probably triggering feelings for jealousy because you’re eager to move on yourself. You have to keep in mind that dwelling on the past isn’t going to help you move forward. Your ex is his own person and wants to move on with his life just as much as you do. Consider if the roles were reversed and he were watching you date a new guy. He’d likely be feeling just as jealous.

The Adjustment Period

There’s an adjustment period after a break up that takes time and, sometimes, several waves of heartbreak. You both have to get used to being out of each other’s lives in order to make space for someone new. If you go to the same school or hang in the same social circles, this will definitely be more challenging. Even if your break up ended on good terms and you want your ex to be happy, seeing him with a new girl will instantly trigger a pang of jealousy. At least at first. But over time it will slowly go away as your memories become distant and your feelings fade out for good. It just takes time.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Jealous? Leave your comment below!

 

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Are You A Jealous Person?

  • Yeah, I tend to get jealous a lot.
  • Not really. It's rare that I feel jealous about something.
  • No way! Getting jealous is such a waste of time.
  • I don't know.

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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

AlexJonesAJ
My mom and dad were supportive about me having a girlfriend. Tho they are indenial of me being male and refuse to use any male terms
reply about 5 hours
joshieboy24
How come all the original people are banned? The admins are crazy....
reply about 9 hours
genius@23
Where did you guys find this thread?? It was posted 11 years ago lol xD
reply about 9 hours
Thorvald
Thorvald posted in Family Issues:
There's a rare disease which currently affects 80 individuals worldwide, called Progeria. A person who is born with this condition experiences rapid aging, and will live to be, on average, about 13 years old. ...how old are you? If you were born with this disease, how would you live differently? Are you older than 13? What would change in your life, if you knew you were living on borrowed time? Are you younger? How would you perceive the world differently, if you knew you only had a few years left? Life is the most precious gift a person can receive. Don't take yours for granted.
reply about 10 hours
EndlessDream
I've been through a heck of a lot too. I have severe health problems and there were so many times I have lain in a hospital bed thinking I was going to die. I deal with severe depression from that along with the matter of loneliness from not being able to leave the house a whole lot my whole life. I don't have any friends  or really anything to do. I almost - you know- did it once. But then after that I went through a chain of dark events ( that I would rather not say for the topic is too arguable on this place. However, in a Catholic way of speaking, I have met a group of Legion. :P ) That practically changed my mind around into a more depth view of life. We, as humans, take life too seriously. I mean it. Is your life really that bad? Really? Are you alive? Are you speaking to another human who might actually smile at you once in your life? Did you see that pretty butterfly that just went by? We are so used to seeing a better, pampered life that tv shows or someone we know has, and we get jealous. " My life is horrible". Oh really? Did you say hi to your dog today? He's happy to see you isn't he? Smell the rain coming? Doesn't it smell good? We fail to look at the small good things in life and concentrate on " Jim broke up with me. I'm never going to be happy again!" Well....maybe Jim wasn't the guy you are supposed to end up with. Ever think of that? Ever think " Well maybe there is an even better guy out there I am supposed to be with! I just have to try and find him!" Eh? I've also learned: Not everyone is going to like you. No matter how nice you are and how much you try to be friendly, Not everyone is going to like you. I just went through this a few days ago with someone on here. She didn't want to talk to me because I was friends with someone who does bad things. Now that is very stereotypical and not right. Just because she does bad things mean I do bad things too? No. It means I accept everyone. Does that mean I accept the bad things she does? NO. But does that mean I have to not like her because of the bad things she does? NO. I love the person, but not the actions, and it breaks my heart to see the person do these things but i still love them. Get it? It's like if your child does something bad. Does that mean you hate them forever? NO. I try to help people, and for some reason i am attracted to those who are wronged or in pain. Another thing, I love horror. Like a lot. I have it allll over my page. Sometimes that scares people and they might say to me " What do you want?" or " You scare me" before I even say hi. You know what else? There are SO many people here that have told me that I am the nicest person on here they have ever talked to. So, some more stereotypes for you. Main theme is, take a break ( seriously) stand outside or something and just look at the sky, breath in the air and watch that bird carry a worm to her nest. Don't judge others by passed on information. Life is good if you make it so.
reply about 10 hours