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Dear Dish-It: I'm Jealous of My Ex's New Girlfriend

Dear Dish-It,

I don’t like my ex-boyfriend anymore, but when he started dating another girl I felt jealous. Is this normal?

Jealous

Dear Jealous,

Moving on after a break up can be tough. It’s especially tough when you have to watch your ex move on before you. Even if you no longer want to be with your ex and you don’t have the same feelings you once had for him, it still takes time to forget the connection you shared.

Moving On

Seeing your ex with another girl is probably triggering feelings for jealousy because you’re eager to move on yourself. You have to keep in mind that dwelling on the past isn’t going to help you move forward. Your ex is his own person and wants to move on with his life just as much as you do. Consider if the roles were reversed and he were watching you date a new guy. He’d likely be feeling just as jealous.

The Adjustment Period

There’s an adjustment period after a break up that takes time and, sometimes, several waves of heartbreak. You both have to get used to being out of each other’s lives in order to make space for someone new. If you go to the same school or hang in the same social circles, this will definitely be more challenging. Even if your break up ended on good terms and you want your ex to be happy, seeing him with a new girl will instantly trigger a pang of jealousy. At least at first. But over time it will slowly go away as your memories become distant and your feelings fade out for good. It just takes time.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Jealous? Leave your comment below!

 

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

GlimmeringSky16
Break down her door, get all your stuff, smash a flower vase, trot out the door yelling "BYE FELICIA!" and don't forget the hair flip.  (: this is how I make friends and never lose any 
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Starflyamme
Starflyamme posted in Friends:
So I have been best friends with this girl for six years, after Halloween she has not called me, answered my calls, or come over to my house (we live close to each other and go over to our houses all the time). I don't know why she hasn't talked to me and shes the type of person if you did something to make her mad she would tell you.  I don't want to call her (it may seem needy) but I have a bunch of her stuff at my house and I really just don't want them there anymore but I don't want to call her have a huge fight and avoid each other ( which would be really hard) forever.
reply about 10 hours
staystrong123
staystrong123 posted in Friends:
This is really true and sad... Many teens, have a problem with this because of society. This post helps. I have had problem with suicide and bullying. Ive felt like I should just end it because I have no point to be here because I'm being told I'm worthless, to fat, to dumb, not pretty enough, all tons of lies and i got to the point that i believe them. I'm an outsider in my school. It fells like a lot of people leave me.  I fell pain a lot. and There is bullying going on in my school. Life fell mean less a lot. I have to remind myself that I do have a point and that people do love me.  I know know I do have a reason to live and so do you guys so  Don't ruin you're life. You're to young.  You're to worthy. The bully are just jealous of you. Don't self harm tonight. Don't comment suicide. You all are worth A lot I promise. People love you. Don't worry about hatters. The hatter are gonna hate but lovers are there to help you trough the pain and if you did comment suicide imagine how they'd fell. Thanks for posting this it really helped me and really could've saved a life:) :) Bullies are just having problems themselves remember that!!!! Stay strong everyone!!!
reply about 12 hours
jordand08
"supernaturalblackcat" wrote:I know i have depession and i have been to the doctor for it. It's starting to get to that point again for the 3rd time this year that i want to be alone. It feels like no one cares about me at school. I really can't trust anybody either. I started to quit eating at home and at school only eating snacks every now and then. I am also losing Weight. I used to get called fat and i wasn't even fat. I have been abused by people who say my butt is smexy and huge and it's not. I have even been slapped on by them. I tell my mom and dad that i've been called fat and my dad ignore's me and continues whatever he's doing. I'm getting to the point again where i'm losing my temper and emotions right on the spot. I can't be bipolar cause it has to run in the family and my mom says i don't have it. People get mad at me when i don't laugh at their jokes when they expect me too cause i really don't listen. But when i say something funny they roll their eyes and give me mean looks. I don't even want to be around people that much. I just want to be outside in the fresh air during school but it's high school so their's no outside time. I also fake smile's at people to make them happy. But i just hurt on the inside. I just want advice.  Hi there. I'm sure you have people who care about you at school, just sometimes it's hard to see it. Dear, you have to eat. I assure you, you're not fat. (smexy isn't necessarily a bad thing)  You have to understand, that people say things just because they can, or to make themselves feel better. Never give them that opportunity, just ignore them. When you're about to lose your temper, think of something that makes you really happy.  If you need someone to talk to, you have your guidance consular, trust me I have social anxiety, and reallly hate talking about my problems, I find it easier for me, to message them. It's their job to listen, but not only that, they really care for all of their students. Talking helps, believe me.
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jordand08
"lion2a3" wrote:its beacause well people at shcool act like your friends but know deep inside i just dont have friendsand then theres bullies some picks on me for no the only place i can be myself KW so should i do suidce also im 11 No Ma'am you shouldn't. Things happen for a reason, normally to make others stronger. Trust me, nothing is worth taking your own life. If you need to talk I'm here, however I would suggest you talking to an adult.  Friends come and go. you have family, and if not, you have me, Trust me, it's not worth it. please, don't. 
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