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Dear Dish-It: I'm Afraid of Performing in Public

Dear Dish-It,

I love to dance and all but I'm afraid of dancing and singing in public. I can never build up the confidence to do the things I love in public. Is there something wrong for me or is it natural?

Crazy

Dear Crazy,

Performing in public, especially the first few times you do it, can be a very intimidating experience. Nearly everyone experiences some degree of nerves before taking to the stage and showing off their talent.

Accept Criticism

There are two reasons you might not be able to build up the confidence. The first is that you’re afraid of messing up. Just remember that the more you practice, the easier it’ll be to perform. The second is that you’re afraid that people might criticize or reject your talent. But consider this: if you never show the world what you’re made of, then what good is having the talent in the first place? You weren’t given the ability to dance and sing so that you could simply perform in front of your bedroom mirror for the rest of your life. Just remember that criticism is something every performer faces. You just need keep your head high, don’t get discouraged and use whatever you’re told as a way to improve.

Start Small

The best way to build confidence is to start by performing in front of people you love and trust. Start with your parents or your extended family. Then move onto your friends. Keep the groups small at first so it’s not so intimidating. Next you can try performing in front of your class or in a school talent show. Once you perform in front of a gymnasium of people you know - people you will see on a daily basis - think about how easy it’ll be to perform in front of an even larger group of strangers who you’ll never have to see again.

You're Not Alone

Take comfort in the fact that even big name celebs like Katy Perry get stage fright before performing. “I got chills and butterflies - it’s a huge adrenaline rush. All the hairs stick up on my body,” she said in regards to her performance at the 2012 Radio 1 Teen Awards. She was so overwhelmed by her nerves that it brought her to tears. So remember, being afraid to perform in public is completely natural whether you’re a beginner or an international superstar. It’s time to gather some courage and dive in! And use that adrenaline rush to your advantage!

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Crazy? Leave your comment below!

 

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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

PerksBeingABookworm
Dear Dish-It:  I recently became friends with an upperclassman guy, Tom*, from my high school. We started hanging out about a month or so ago. To be honest, I thought the relationship was platonic: we've never flirted although we've bantered, I don't use flirty emojis with him and although I spend a lot of time with him, he has always said how much I remind him of my brother (who is the same age as me), and he's never stolen glances at me or given me the impression that he was into me that way. I rationalized that he saw me as a little sister the same way as I viewed him as an older brother, since he constantly made references to my brother and never attempted to flirt nor gave off any of the typical visual signals of attraction. I also don't see myself as someone who'd be attractive or crush-worthy from the perspective of a high school junior, since I'm a freshman in high school and definitely not modelesque, and we pretty much stuck to group outings. So when he asked me out 2 weeks ago, needless to say it came as a surprise. We decided to remain friends, but I'm having trouble establishing boundaries, especially since my sister informed me that one of his friends told her that Tom "wasn't going to give up on me" and that Tom was going to adhere to the "Three Strikes Rule": apparently, he can wait and ask me out 2 more times before giving up on pursuing me.  Dish-It, how do I remain friends with this guy without this becoming awkward? What do I do? Just this past weekend he wanted to s**pe call me and kept s.n.a.p.ch*tting me. I literally feigned accidentally sleeping in yesterday to avoid meeting up with him (he invited my siblings and I to go play tennis at our high school), and I haven't talked to him since Saturday (we do track together so it was kind of unavoidable). I need space, and I want to remain friends, but he's really making me feel uncomfortable.  Thanks, -Perks. P.S.: This is the second junior who has asked me out this year (and the second guy I've rejected). Maybe I'm just really naive and oblivious, but I genuinely don't see myself as attractive to guys...how do I stop accidentally leading them on? Because I'm not trying to, really-I'm not flirty or anything. I have no idea why they like me, I don't think I'm being overly nice and I'm not answering texts right away or anything. This guy didn't get my phone information from me, he got it from another person on our coed sports team and he originally texted me 2 months ago to tell me that he was worried about my brother so I didn't think he was making a move on me. *Names have been changed for privacy reasons. (Also: the chat filter keeps unnecessarily censoring my writing).
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Shadeleaf
Shadeleaf posted in Friends:
I'm actually already being made fun of for my interests in Undertale. i kinda don't see how playing DnD can be that bad... it's fine. Thx .
reply 4 days
Shadeleaf
"al######ote: i am in love with a boy ..and planning to marry him ..  [s:p/zwq] [s:p/oaq] [s:p/1koh] [s:p/1jn8] [s:p/1jks] Congrats! just hope he doesn't abandon you like mine terrible attempts at a relationship. You may be even luckier than me :3
reply 4 days
drowning
drowning posted in Friends:
"Shadeleaf" wrote: I've been wondering. I got the  books and all i need would be extra graph paper and character sheets....  Anyways my dad gave me this idea on Friday and I was thinking of it today. Maybe find a few nerds like me... who knows. My dad told me people would make fun of me, but i don't care.... You will face a little making fun of, but as long as you can get past that and ignore others, I think you'll be just fine. If you're already aware of any others like you throughout the school, maybe you should look into making a group! Slip them a note or talk to them yourself, see if they're interested. Good luck!
reply 4 days
drowning
###### wrote: i am in love with a boy ..and planning to marry him ..  [s:p/zwq] [s:p/oaq] [s:p/1koh] [s:p/1jn8] [s:p/1jks] I realize that I got engaged young as well, but 10 is a tad different. :^)
reply 4 days