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Dear Dish-it: I Want To Grow Up

Dec 27, 2012

Dear Dish-it,

I'm a young teen, just finishing pubertybut I really want to be an adult. No one will hire someone my age, so I can't get an after school job. My parents buy a lot of junk food; I want to be able to go to the store on my own and pick out a better diet, but I can't do that either. I also want to move out and get my own place. Is there something wrong with me?

13 Going On 30

Dear 13 Going On 30,

Let me start by saying that there’s nothing wrong with you. Lots of people your age feel the desire to grow up and be an adult before it’s time. It’s your desire for freedom that’s causing you to feel this way. It just shows that you’re maturing. But remember, being a kid and a teen can be the best part of your life. You have very few responsibilities and you get to have fun and hang out with your friends on a daily basis. Most adults don’t have that luxury.

With Adulthood Comes Responsibilies

What you’re desiring are the good things about being an adult: choosing what you eat, living on your own, making your own money. But you’re forgetting about all the responsibilities that come along with that. With a job, you’ll have to pay taxes and lose your free time to spend with friends. Buying your own food seems like a nice idea, but the costs can be astronomical. And of course, having your own place would cost you a fortune in time and money. You’d have to maintain a yard if you have one, clean your entire house, and cook your own meals. Plus you need to pay rent along with other expenses like your cable, internet and hydro.

Enjoy Life’s Journey

Don’t rush your life. I did the same thing when I was your age. But my mom always told me, “it’s the journey that defines you, not the destination.” This always seemed so preachy until I really thought about it. The journey is what defines us. It’s good to dream, but if we focus too hard on the things we want rather than the things we have, we won’t enjoy life’s ride. Not only that, but we also won’t appreciate the things we achieve if they come too quickly or easily. So please, enjoy being a teen. It’ll only last for a few years and once it’s over, you’ll be wishing you had that time back.

Make Money

If you're really interested in making your own money, there is a way. There's a company called Kidworth that's dedicated to helping teen entrepreneurs start their own businesses. Check out our Kidworth article and see if it's right for you!

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for 13 Going On 30? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

86 Comments

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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply about 23 hours
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply 1 day
fitta
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? i suggest you wait i mean you are going to be 16 that's way too young to be dating someone who is 4/5 years older than you,no? You can still talk to him when it comes to your anxiety attacks and all of that because I have those too every night so I know how it feels, but maybe you should wait. But at the end of the day it's your decision I'm just here to give advice 
reply 1 day
SatanslilDemon
Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice???
reply 1 day
SmartSunnyShadow
I feel like that too. My best friend will always hang out with her 'new friends' that I have a really bad opinion about. My friend will treat me rudely all the time and sometimes make fun of me with her friends. But, when I needed her the most in my life, she was there for me, and I told her how I felt. She says that she just wants to hang out with more people and apologized, people can be a little teasy at times.  Also, after seeing each other for a long time, people make new friends and start hanging out with them more, it doesn't mean that she doesn't like you.  This may be different for you, but just tell her about it, she will have to know you feelings at one point.  Hope I helped you. 
reply 1 day