x

Meet New Friends!

Recommended friends are based on your interests. Make sure they are up to date.

Friends
Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-it: Is My Boyfriend Too Controlling?

Jan 17, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

My boyfriend won't let me walk to lunch with my friends or dance with other guys at school dances, and I'm not even a flirt. Is this normal? Or is he too controlling?

Controlled

Dear Controlled,

I don't know the whole story, of course, but it sounds to me like your boyfriend is being a bit too controlling. There's a give and take when it comes to relationships. If he's not comfortable with you dancing with other guys at school dances  you should ask him why. Maybe he's insecure and worried that you might fall for a different guy. If you two haven't been together very long, maybe you should show him how much you care about him by respecting his wishes and only dancing with him. Over time, you'll build more trust, and maybe then you can revisit the issue.

Don't Alienate You Friends

As for walking with your friends to lunch, that's a different story. It's unreasonable of him to deny you that. You need to be able to spend time with your friends too. You can't have a healthy relationship if you're together 24/7 and wind up alienating your friendsWhy not try alternating days: one day you can walk with him, and the next day you can walk with your friends? Compromise is part of a good relationship, and he needs to understand that.

Be Your Own Person

Please don't let your boyfriend treat you like a parent  You say that "he won't let you" do things. Well, you're your own person. He doesn't get to make those decisions for you. If he has a concern, he should talk to you about it like an equal instead of trying to control you. If he continues to do this, maybe he's not the right guy for you. Not only that, but maybe he needs to take some time and reassess what it really means to be in a relationship.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Controlled? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

158 Comments

Related Stories

Micro_deardish-boyfriendreputation-micro
Hesitant asks: I recently started going out with a boy from another school. He’s really nice and ...
Micro_dating_micro
NSN678 asks: "I asked someone to go out with me and I don't know if we are cause he's giving all ...
Micro_kiss_micro
Confused asks: "My boyfriend asked me when we were going to kiss. We are only in the 5th grade. W...
I don't know what to do about my boyfriend. He acts like my father. He tells me what kind of musi...
Polls-boyfriendturnoffs

What would be your biggest turnoff in a boyfriend?

  • He does drugs.
  • He picks his nose.
  • He gets jealous when I talk to other guys.
  • He lies to me.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Random_Chik
I have trichotillomania and am willing to help other people with it and get help myself. It kind of like a little support group of trich-ers!
reply 2 days
NovaHex
NovaHex posted in Family Issues:
Pretty much, but in weird ways. I'll have my dad one day telling me that hair (that's around less than a foot in length) is too long. Or, when I'm eating breakfast, he'll yell at me to eat my ####### (sounds really wrong) ,specifically, first, under the guise that he "told me to".
reply 2 days
EndlessDream
"joshieboy24" wrote: How come all the original people are banned? The admins are crazy.... The admins didn't ban them. They either got too old and had to leave or just left. When you reach 18, your acc is locked. 
reply 2 days
AlexJonesAJ
My mom and dad were supportive about me having a girlfriend. Tho they are indenial of me being male and refuse to use any male terms
reply 3 days
joshieboy24
How come all the original people are banned? The admins are crazy....
reply 3 days