x

Meet New Friends!

Recommended friends are based on your interests. Make sure they are up to date.

Friends
Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-it: I Have A Crush On My Best Friend

Feb 07, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

My best friend and I have been inseparable since we were little kids. But now that she has a boyfriend, I don't see her as much. Seeing her with another guy makes me jealous and I realize that I have a crush on her. Should I tell her?

Crushing

Dear Crushing,

It sounds to me like you didn't realize you had more than friendly feelings for your bff until she got a boyfriend. This jealousy that you're feeling may not stem from romantic feelings. It could be from the fact that you're growing up and apart, as though she's moving on without you. As you grow up, it's natural for best friends to lead separate lives, which means getting into relationships. That doesn't mean your friendship is over. It's just part of the maturing process. Maybe you'd feel better about your best friend having a boyfriend if you had a girlfriend of your own. 

Gauge Her Feelings

If you're certain that the feelings you have for her are romantic, that's okay. Whether or not you tell her will depend on your specific situation. But keep in mind that if she's happy in her relationship and you do decide to spill the beans, you may not get the response you want. In fact, it might make things awkward for you guys. Your best bet is to wait. If she and her boyfriend break up, be there for her. Allow her some time to heal. And try to gauge her interaction with you. Does she show signs that she likes you too, or are they all in your head? Sometimes, when we have a crush, we only see what we want to see. Don't allow yourself to be blinded by love. 

The Possible Outcomes

There are three ways this could go if you do reveal your feelings to her: first (and best case scenario) she might reciprocate those feelings and you'll both live happily ever after; second, she may tell you that she doesn't feel the same way and hope that you guys can still be best friends; and third (and worst case scenario) she might be freaked out by your confession and it could put a strain on your friendship. Think all of these possible outcomes through before making your decision. Is revealing your feelings worth potentially losing her as a friend? Or is keeping your feelings inside too painful?

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Crushing? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

344 Comments

Related Stories

Micro_deardish-crush-micro
Dear Dish-It: I’ve had a crush on this guy for over two years now. We’ve had five classes togethe...
Micro_crush_micro
Cookie asks: “How do I make the first move when it comes to chatting with my crush? I’m craving c...
Micro_howtoplanadate-micro
Asking someone out can seem like a piece of cake until you realize that you then have to plan a d...
Micro_boyfriend_micro
Hopeful2012 asks: “I’m turning 16 this year and I’ve never had a boyfriend, but all of my friends...
Crush_poll

Should You Make A Move On Your Crush?

  • YES: If you don't it may not ever happen!
  • No: If it's meant to be you won't have to do anything to make it happen
  • Maybe: It depends on how sure you are your crush likes you back
  • Dunno: I've never had a crush on anyone before

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

bnz05
bnz05 posted in Friends:
Hii, i want to give advice to all of you about this subject. first of all, always trust your BFF. why?, it's because she/he is the one who makes you feel like a family and always be there with you. Second, always remember your BFF where ever you are. i got this idea from my bff whose not n the same school with me. 8 February was her birthday while i said happy birthday to her 2 day later (i know i'm the worst). i literally panicked and said sorry to her like a thousand times. while she said "it's okay, i'm glad someone in your school (because some of us transfers here at my new school too) remembers my birthday, maybe all of them already forget me" she answered (which i'm touched). and the last, never ever betray your BFF. like i said at the start, they are like your family and will do anything for you to be happy. so keep their trust too. and that's all from me, hope it's helpful. love ya [s:sm3/1jw1]
reply about 8 hours
esthery27
esthery27 posted in Friends:
I think you should just be yourself and be patient. You will find some eventually
reply about 10 hours
mococospartan
mococospartan posted in Friends:
"mococospartan" wrote:You see i am very POPULAR at school but the truth is im popular but dont have any true friends the end 
reply about 11 hours
mococospartan
mococospartan posted in Friends:
You see i am very POPULAR at school but the truth is im popular but dont have any true friends the end 
reply about 11 hours
bffeaea
bffeaea posted in Friends:
I don't know you and I'm not exactly sure how you act, but being friendly is definitely the way to go. Don't change yourself for ANYBODY. Especially someone who you don't need to impress. Speaking of impressing, don't try, do. If you are telling a story and that happens to impress them than that's great! But don't go out of your way to try to make yourself look awesome because I'm sure you already are. Be yourself. But the most important thug now you can do is not try to make a million friends. Because personally I would rather have one AWESOME friend than a million ok friends. I hope this helped. :)
reply 1 day