Kw-logo-smaller

Dear Dish-it: I Have A Crush On My Best Friend

Feb 07, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

My best friend and I have been inseparable since we were little kids. But now that she has a boyfriend, I don't see her as much. Seeing her with another guy makes me jealous and I realize that I have a crush on her. Should I tell her?

Crushing

Dear Crushing,

It sounds to me like you didn't realize you had more than friendly feelings for your bff until she got a boyfriend. This jealousy that you're feeling may not stem from romantic feelings. It could be from the fact that you're growing up and apart, as though she's moving on without you. As you grow up, it's natural for best friends to lead separate lives, which means getting into relationships. That doesn't mean your friendship is over. It's just part of the maturing process. Maybe you'd feel better about your best friend having a boyfriend if you had a girlfriend of your own. 

Gauge Her Feelings

If you're certain that the feelings you have for her are romantic, that's okay. Whether or not you tell her will depend on your specific situation. But keep in mind that if she's happy in her relationship and you do decide to spill the beans, you may not get the response you want. In fact, it might make things awkward for you guys. Your best bet is to wait. If she and her boyfriend break up, be there for her. Allow her some time to heal. And try to gauge her interaction with you. Does she show signs that she likes you too, or are they all in your head? Sometimes, when we have a crush, we only see what we want to see. Don't allow yourself to be blinded by love. 

The Possible Outcomes

There are three ways this could go if you do reveal your feelings to her: first (and best case scenario) she might reciprocate those feelings and you'll both live happily ever after; second, she may tell you that she doesn't feel the same way and hope that you guys can still be best friends; and third (and worst case scenario) she might be freaked out by your confession and it could put a strain on your friendship. Think all of these possible outcomes through before making your decision. Is revealing your feelings worth potentially losing her as a friend? Or is keeping your feelings inside too painful?

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Crushing? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

343 Comments

latest videos

Crush_poll

Should You Make A Move On Your Crush?

  • YES: If you don't it may not ever happen!
  • No: If it's meant to be you won't have to do anything to make it happen
  • Maybe: It depends on how sure you are your crush likes you back
  • Dunno: I've never had a crush on anyone before

related stories

Micro_deardish-crush-micro
Dear Dish-It: I’ve had a crush on this guy for over two years now. We’ve had five classes togethe...
Micro_crush_micro
Cookie asks: “How do I make the first move when it comes to chatting with my crush? I’m craving c...
Micro_howtoplanadate-micro
Asking someone out can seem like a piece of cake until you realize that you then have to plan a d...
Micro_boyfriend_micro
Hopeful2012 asks: “I’m turning 16 this year and I’ve never had a boyfriend, but all of my friends...

Dear Dish-It in the forums

Lulu335
Lulu335 posted in Friends:
How do I know if a guy like's me or not? If I don't know, I can't let him down easy. HELP! [s:p/1jkh]
reply about 2 hours
Narwhals3
Narwhals3 posted in Style:
I only have 2 ear piercings on each ear but a daith looks really cute if the piercer puts in the heart shaped jewelry when they pierce it 
reply about 2 hours
classicrockgirl71
It's in a ponytail
reply about 3 hours
PotatoRainbows
PotatoRainbows posted in Friends:
Well, 3 days ago we went to a lake to swim at and I saw my "friend" there. I felt very embarrassed. My mom told me to go play with her, and I asked her if she was still my friend. All she said was "meh". Her family was friendly, they kept on saying hi to me. But I can't afford to loose my relationship with her; if i did, I would start 5th grade with no friends. The only real school friend that I have is my friend from my old school that's visiting the philippines. All of the other friends that I have are people who are related to me by blood.  I just don't want 5th grade to be a bad school year.
reply about 3 hours
classicrockgirl71
My answer is both.
reply about 7 hours

play online games