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Dear Dish-it: I Have A Crush On My Best Friend

Feb 07, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

My best friend and I have been inseparable since we were little kids. But now that she has a boyfriend, I don't see her as much. Seeing her with another guy makes me jealous and I realize that I have a crush on her. Should I tell her?

Crushing

Dear Crushing,

It sounds to me like you didn't realize you had more than friendly feelings for your bff until she got a boyfriend. This jealousy that you're feeling may not stem from romantic feelings. It could be from the fact that you're growing up and apart, as though she's moving on without you. As you grow up, it's natural for best friends to lead separate lives, which means getting into relationships. That doesn't mean your friendship is over. It's just part of the maturing process. Maybe you'd feel better about your best friend having a boyfriend if you had a girlfriend of your own. 

Gauge Her Feelings

If you're certain that the feelings you have for her are romantic, that's okay. Whether or not you tell her will depend on your specific situation. But keep in mind that if she's happy in her relationship and you do decide to spill the beans, you may not get the response you want. In fact, it might make things awkward for you guys. Your best bet is to wait. If she and her boyfriend break up, be there for her. Allow her some time to heal. And try to gauge her interaction with you. Does she show signs that she likes you too, or are they all in your head? Sometimes, when we have a crush, we only see what we want to see. Don't allow yourself to be blinded by love. 

The Possible Outcomes

There are three ways this could go if you do reveal your feelings to her: first (and best case scenario) she might reciprocate those feelings and you'll both live happily ever after; second, she may tell you that she doesn't feel the same way and hope that you guys can still be best friends; and third (and worst case scenario) she might be freaked out by your confession and it could put a strain on your friendship. Think all of these possible outcomes through before making your decision. Is revealing your feelings worth potentially losing her as a friend? Or is keeping your feelings inside too painful?

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Crushing? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

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Comments

CherrytheSkylyn
Don't listen to this ####, Crushing! Get her in the right moment and tell her your feel...
commented: Thu Nov 20, 2014

xXKittyCandyLuvXx
Oh my gosh. This is the most adorable article I have ever read! :) I have a crush on ...
commented: Thu Nov 20, 2014

Arshawn

Arshawn wrote:

:D
commented: Mon Mar 31, 2014

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Crush_poll

Should You Make A Move On Your Crush?

  • YES: If you don't it may not ever happen!
  • No: If it's meant to be you won't have to do anything to make it happen
  • Maybe: It depends on how sure you are your crush likes you back
  • Dunno: I've never had a crush on anyone before

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Cataclysm_Destruct
I'd also shift the blame onto the parents. It's disgusting and appalling to know that parents don't care about their own child's wellbeing. 
reply about 14 hours
katieee123_
katieee123_ posted in Friends:
"Charulata" wrote: "katieee123_" wrote: I'm not going to judge her, it was most likely her parents fault. Poor girl. I'm sorry , But I don't think it's her parents fault. Her parents didn't tell her do anything with anyone , She did. Her parents isn't involved in this case!!  She's 13. Kids that age base some of their decisions off of what their parents say. Her parents should have told her what's right and what's wrong, which they most likely didn't do since apparently they didn't care.
reply about 14 hours
SpecialProblem
SpecialProblem posted in Friends:
how are you helping me at all :/
reply about 19 hours
Jelly3
Jelly3 posted in Style:
A red tee and three fourths. 
reply about 19 hours
GottaLoveDance
GottaLoveDance posted in Friends:
"9bella" wrote:You could invite another friend to walk with you guys. thanks for the comment
reply about 19 hours

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