Dear Dish-it: Am I Cool?

Feb 28, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

I don't think I'm cool. I have lots of friends, and even a girlfriend. Does that make me cool?

Questionably Cool

Dear Questionably Cool,

Being cool is determined by your state of mind, and it affects how other people perceive you. You don't have to look a certain way or dress in fashionable clothes or have a bad attitude. All you really need is confidence. But that has to come from inside of you. So you need to change your thoughts. Stop telling yourself that you're not cool. Instead, tell yourself that you're a good person, surround yourself with positive people and don't worry about what other people think of you.

What Does Cool Look Like?

Consider the kids at school who are considered cool. There's probably a wide range of looks and body types and personalities. What makes them cool? Likely it's because they're confident and outgoing and they have a lot of friends. Well, you already have the friends part down. Now you just need the confidence.

Remember What's Important

Keep in mind, though, that being cool is not what life is about. The fact that you have a great group of friends and a girlfriend should be enriching enough. Always be yourself and don't try to fit into someone else's mold of what cool or popular looks like. In other words, embrace who you are. If the "cool kids" don't think you're cool, then they're not the type of people you should be surrounding yourself with anyway. However, if your friends and your girlfriend and all the people who love you think you're cool, then, my friend, you've already won.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Questionably Cool? Tell us in our comment section below!



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Dear Dish-It in the forums

XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
My friend problem: Get ready 'cause this'll be long. Problem = ... Okay, so I know this girl, Amelia. Last year when I was new at school she invited me to sit with her and her friends on the second day. Since then, we've been 'best friends'. Throughout the whole of last year she was really great. Now, it's been a few weeks since the first day of school - 5th grade. On the first day she was really happy to see me and we did all that normal BFF stuff. We even traced one of each of our hands and wrote 'BFFs' at the top. It all started with this.                                                   HOW IT HAPPENED One day we were sitting in the cafeteria. Her: Hey, what should we do during recess today? Another Friend Who Doesn't Like Amelia: Hey, do you want to do ______________? Me: Ummmmmmmmmmmm ......... errrrrrrrr .............. Me: (Thinking of Plan) Me: Eureka! Me: Hey, Amelia, I have this idea. Since you don't like Belen .... (this is other friend's name)  and you don't like her, I was thinking: Maybe on Monday I could hang out with you and Tuesday with her ... etc. Her: Cool. Well ... okay. Note: Well, I was feeling pretty bad, because she'd been a really great friend, but then I thought: Hey, it's only one day! It's not like I told her "Hey, I'm going to ditch you!" So then I went off with Belen. Well, the next day, or maybe a few days later - I don't remember - she told me during recess again: Her: Hey, do you want to go hang out with them over there? Points Me: Sure ... why not? Then we went on over there. During the whole of that recess, she didn't pay much attention to me. That was when I got suspicious. Now, it's been, like, 4 weeks since the first day of school. I decided to hang out with Belen during recess on Friday. Tomorrow is Monday, btw. Belen: Are you going to hang out with me during recess today? Me: Yeah. I would've wanted to go off with Amelia, but she was blowing me off lately. Last year a lot of people weren't her friends and she wasn't that social. Now, I see her flirting with _ _ _ _ _ _ easily and everyone (even people who left her out of their groups last year) is crowding around her while she talks about her big party. Last time, she even asked me if I wanted to go away with Belen, because she wasn't there either. Maybe I'm overreacting and she's just getting to be friends with a lot more people. I dunno. Should I be happy for her? Like I said, Belen and Amelia kinda hate each other, which is pretty inconvenient because they're both my best friends. So, you know that 'big party' Amelia is hosting? Belen's not invited and I don't know about myself, either. During yet ANOTHER recess Belen was talking about planning her birthday party. Now it's October 4th and her birthday is actually on January 21. Weird. I think she means this as a revenge party, because she is NOT inviting Amelia. Am I overreacting and taking this too seriously? Maybe I'm not and Amelia really isn't a good friend. But if I go to Belen's party and have an awesome time, Amelia (if I was overreacting) would be really upset. Then she would ditch me - FOR REAL. If I AM invited to Amelia's party, then what if she started blowing me off there? I don't want to look like a pesky little 'friend', clinging onto her. I NEED HELP. P.S. I have another problem caused by the first problem. I am crushing really hard on My Crush. I'm sure boys like fun, bouncy, happy, perky girls. He usually sees me during recess, where Amelia is usually blowing me off. Then, I start acting really sluggish and moody. Basically downright not-in-the-fun-mood. What would he think? Thank you for your help. P.P.S. PLEASE DO help me. This is an emergency. Thank you very much for your help (if you do help, that is.)
reply 17 minutes
XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
Perfect Friend: Someone who will support you when you fail. Someone who encourages you. Someone who sticks with you. Someone who comforts you when things go wrong. Someone who is funny and makes you laugh. Someone who tells you the answers in class ... Someone who would wait for you after detention. Someone who would buy you great presents for your birthday. Someone who you know you can always count on. Someone nice (obvious). Someone who never fights with you. Someone who would always be a good friend, even if you weren't. Someone who is loyal. Someone who'd never go off with some other person. Someone who would read all this stuff without telling me they were bored.
reply about 1 hour
XxIHateMathxX posted in Friends:
This thing happened in kindergarten ... too embarrassing to even talk about it now ... so bye.
reply about 6 hours
"CountessElectra" wrote:The loss of my grandad was horrible. I felt so sad at the time. I felt like i would never stop crying when my parents told me. It still makes me sad today... aww. i hope everything's okay :(
reply about 7 hours
"hugebear" wrote:This is the awesome thread and thank you for posting it manu [stickied] :) thank you huge :) 
reply about 7 hours

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