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Dear Dish-it: How Do I Change My Reputation?

May 15, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

I’ve been putting up a front for 2 years now. I pretend to be reckless, evil and crazy, and I don’t know why. Now I have a stupid reputationI want to go back to the way I was before, a girl who loves animals, nature, anti-bullying clubs, school, reading and writing. What should I do?

Pretender

Dear Pretender,

As we grow up, it’s normal to go through different phases. We try out different personalities, clothing styles, groups of friends and over-all personas. But in truth, we’re only trying to figure out who we are. Usually there is a deeper reason why we adopt extremes, like being evil and crazy as you say. Look inside yourself and figure out what is missing in your life that is causing you to act this way. Are you having troubles at home? With school? With friends? With your self-image or confidence? Are you lonely? Once you’ve figured out the reason, you need to take steps toward filling this void with positivity.

Moving On

The great thing is, it looks like you’re on the right track. The fact that you want to return to your old self shows that maybe you’ve already moved on from that underlying issue. So congrats! That’s a big step.

Get Involved

The things that you love are very impressive and it’s important that you pursue these passions again. Try getting involved at school, by joining a club or sport. People might be resistant to accept this new you at first, especially if they know the reckless side. But if you consistently show them your softer side, people will eventually forget your crazy past. Another way to go is to join a club outside of school. The new people you meet there won’t know you. So you can be the person you want to be from the start.

Take The First Step

The first step will definitely be the hardest. You may have to change your look or your attitude or, toughest of all, your friends. But it’ll be totally worth it once you stop living this lie and reveal your true self. Don’t let anyone bring you down. You’re strong and you can do this!

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Pretender? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

59 Comments

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
"sparkly_chick" wrote: I keep saying stupid things and messing up with my friends and now they hate me. /.\ Don't say "they don't deserve you" or something, because I don't deserve them. They're great friends and I'm just... stupid. I'm sorry dear but things do get better and its not your fault. Everyone messes up, its just a part a life. If you need to talk and explain to me with more info you can, I'm here. :)    ^^This. You're not stupid either. Everybody makes mistakes and messes things up.
reply about 7 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Don't make your mom get irritated or she might start abusing you too. Talk to a counselor at school or something and figure out a way, like living with a relative or something. A counsellor is a good idea but talking to your mom is more important. She's your guardian. Don't worry about irritating her, tell her how you feel. Communication is important and the fear of getting abused should never ever get in between your relationship unless it's a previous factor in that relationship (not one with someone else). You have a right to tell her how you feel and have a discussion with her about it. I'm sure you can come to some sort of understanding. And if not, then maybe talk to someone outside the family. But don't go behind her back and talk to someone else about it unless it's 100% necessary for your family. She needs to know how you feel.
reply about 7 hours
Kirsteeeeen
I know it must feel awful. But you have to remember that your parents still love you, they just don't have time to show it sometimes. Autism requires a lot of work, attention, and support. Unfortunately that's a sacrifice you make for family. Sometimes you have to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. They're doing this for the family.
reply about 7 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
Just go to hottopic get too many band t-shirts and a homestuck t-shirt put on black pants and cardigan and anime character shoes and the end  My life.
reply about 7 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
Why not both? :p
reply about 7 hours

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