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Dear Dish-it: How Do I Change My Reputation?

May 15, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

I’ve been putting up a front for 2 years now. I pretend to be reckless, evil and crazy, and I don’t know why. Now I have a stupid reputationI want to go back to the way I was before, a girl who loves animals, nature, anti-bullying clubs, school, reading and writing. What should I do?


Dear Pretender,

As we grow up, it’s normal to go through different phases. We try out different personalities, clothing styles, groups of friends and over-all personas. But in truth, we’re only trying to figure out who we are. Usually there is a deeper reason why we adopt extremes, like being evil and crazy as you say. Look inside yourself and figure out what is missing in your life that is causing you to act this way. Are you having troubles at home? With school? With friends? With your self-image or confidence? Are you lonely? Once you’ve figured out the reason, you need to take steps toward filling this void with positivity.

Moving On

The great thing is, it looks like you’re on the right track. The fact that you want to return to your old self shows that maybe you’ve already moved on from that underlying issue. So congrats! That’s a big step.

Get Involved

The things that you love are very impressive and it’s important that you pursue these passions again. Try getting involved at school, by joining a club or sport. People might be resistant to accept this new you at first, especially if they know the reckless side. But if you consistently show them your softer side, people will eventually forget your crazy past. Another way to go is to join a club outside of school. The new people you meet there won’t know you. So you can be the person you want to be from the start.

Take The First Step

The first step will definitely be the hardest. You may have to change your look or your attitude or, toughest of all, your friends. But it’ll be totally worth it once you stop living this lie and reveal your true self. Don’t let anyone bring you down. You’re strong and you can do this!

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Pretender? Tell us in our comment section below!



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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
Maybe he likes you, as a friend or as more.
reply about 9 hours
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
Friends grow apart as we grow up and change at different rates. It's fine to stop being friends, but it doesn't have to be in a mean way. The best thing to do is talk to her (nicely). You don't have to tell her she's being childish or you feel as if you've matured more. That would be terrible. Talk about things you guys like to do in common or make plans to try new things together. Or don't mention it at all, but don't just begin ignoring her. Eventually the friendship will fade the less time you spend together. 
reply about 11 hours
Amalegend20 posted in Friends:
You should be nice to her. If you have to break the news gently don't make her feel bad just talk to her about and see what she says  
reply 1 day
hugebear posted in Friends:
My bff and I were best friends but weve grown apart im getting older and she still wants to do kid stuff I have new friends now I feel like im being mean to her but like doesn't she get the memo I feel both guilty and mad:} Gosh.... put the shoe on  the other foot and see how would you feel if your bff done this on you. You has been bffs for the long time [Im guessing] and your maturing faster than her.  I agrees you are being mean to her if you doesnt discuss how your feeling with her and ignoring / avoiding her or whatever your doing.    She has been the good friend to you and she deserves to understand if you is growing up faster than her.  I really feels sad for how she could be feeling right now. She didnt do anything wrong.  You changed. Not her. Please be nice to your friend/ex friend and let her down gently [if you really has to] ^^ Me opinion  
reply 1 day
Desiixx posted in Friends:
Don't worry about it. Friends grow apart. That's how things go. Just talk to her about it, she'll understand. 
reply 1 day

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