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Dear Dish-it: Is Popularity Worth It?

Jul 26, 2013

Dear Dish-it,

I am popular but I'm starting to wonder if it's worth the trouble. In the morning, it's such an effort to make sure that I look perfect. I play sports, participate in after-school clubs, do gymnastics, run the student council, write for the school newspaper and maintain straight A's. I do all that while trying to keep my popularity. Hiding behind this fake smile is starting to get to me. Is being popular worth it?

Confused

Dear Confused,

Whether you're in middle school or high school, you've got a lot on your plate. It's great that you participate in so many extra-curricular activities all while getting straight A's. That will look great on your college application. But popularity shouldn't be on that list. Popularity isn't an activity or something that you need to maintain, like your grades. It's something that you should simply be, naturally, not because of how you dress or do your make-up. Being popular should come from the fact that you're a nice person, someone who treats everyone well and is therefore liked by others.

What Popularity Really Means

Over the years, the term popularity has become misconstrued. By definition, popularity means being liked, admired or supported by many people. Nowadays, it has come to mean someone who is good looking, known by many people, and oftentimes treats "unpopular" people poorly. To become someone truly popular, both in school and in the rest of your life, just remember to be kind and confident. Worry less about how you look, and more about how you present your personality to the world. It is better to have a few friends who you can trust and respect and who feel the same about you than it is to have a ton of people who think you're pretty.

Be Yourself

So in answer to your question, no. Popularity by today's standards is not important. You shouldn't have to put on a fake smile just to please other people. It's more important to be kind and to be yourself, and if others don't like you for who you are, it's their loss for missing out on a good thing.

Have Your Say

Do you have any advice for Confused? Tell us in our comment section below!

 

234 Comments

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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Abbergrl
Well I strongly agree with you all. It's like, wow I never knew so many people had this problem!
reply about 9 hours
Abbergrl
Abbergrl posted in Friends:
A perfect friend is one who respects your feelings and doesn't make fun of them but helps you feel better, who can drive you only slightly insane, and who will try to save you from embarrassing situations by making you see the funny side. :) :D
reply about 9 hours
Delisco
Delisco posted in Friends:
A perfect friend is one who is always there for you not minding how many times you chase them away. They are people who you can rely on solely because they have proved to be those you can trust.  They are also those you can call partners in crime. They are not judgemental . They are those who can die for you if the need arise. 
reply about 11 hours
drowning
"SatanslilDemon" wrote: Ok so I have a dilemma. I really, and I mean really like this guy. He's considerate of my mental wellbeing and health, plus he's really funny and sweet. He's respectful, loyal, and his hugs are the best ever(he's like a foot and 4 inches taller than me). the dilemma is, he'stwentyandI'mfifteenturningsixteensoon.... I'm not gonna even ask about dating him until i'm sixteen but I've called him in total anxiety attack crying my eyes out and he calmed me down and made me laugh, and I invited him to come see a choir performance so he spent the day with me... My mom ships us... but I'm a little worried because of the age difference  and experience difference and just, I don't want to miss the chance of being with him because of it. ​  any advice??? It's really nice that your mother supports it, that always helps!! I'm glad that your family enjoys his company as well. Being 16 while he's 20 is alright. It's a slight odd age gap. But, I think as long as you both are ready, it's alright. Make sure you're mature and safe with your choices though. Personally, I think you should wait until you're closer to at least, 17. But, as long as you two are smart about what you're doing, it should be alright when it come around to it.
reply 4 days
fitta
"Shygirl15" wrote:I really like this boy in my second period class but i dont know how to tell him because he knows that im transgender do whatever makes you feel comfortable or just wing it and tell him and if he tells you something because you're trans forget about him! He doesn't deserve you. But it's totally okay if you want to play it safe and not go up to him. You do you. :3 
reply 4 days