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Dear Dish-It, Should I Hook Up With Him?

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".

Dear Dish-It,

I recently had my first "hooking up" experience. It was a nice Saturday night, I'd been drinking, I wasn't drunk but I was pretty happy, and this guy was being really sweet in a sleazy sort of way, (y'know, the whole "I love your skin. You're so beautiful" thing) and we kissed and it was so nice.

Problem? He told me to call him, so I did, and he was playing it all cool but he was saying really sweet things like "I wanna hold you" and "You made me feel good" etc. But, I can't describe it, he was being all laid-back and it just felt like he was just saying things to make me fall for him. I just felt like he wasn't being genuine. He also kept hinting that he wanted to do it again, which I was perfectly fine with because I hardly knew him and he was a GOOD KISSER. I don't want that whole emotional attachment, but he's just making me feel so confused! Should I hook up with him again, which is what I want to do, or is it a bad idea if he's messing with my feelings like this?
tannii

Dear tannii,

Honey, please tell me you are not seriously considering getting back with this guy. Your first mistake was "hooking up" with him in the first place. Your profile says you're 15 - do you think it's a good idea to be drinking and messing around with random sleazy guys? I think you already know it's not cool to be drinking, but it's super uncool to be drinking and putting yourself in compromising positions. This time all you had to fend off were his cheesy lines, but are you sure that's all you'll have to worry about next time? This guy has just one thing on his mind and you're playing right into his game.

You're too young to be so jaded about relationships and emotional attachment. Dating can be a really great thing, especially at your age. You get to hang out and get to know one another, anxiously anticipate your first kiss, etc. Instead, you're going to start this aspect of your life off on the wrong foot - hooking up with whoever whispers sleazy lines into your ear isn't healthy. So, in case my answer so far isn't entirely clear, I would recommend that you do not get together with this guy again. Have a little self-respect and wait for a guy who will at least take you to a movie before jamming his tongue in your mouth!

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .

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Are Hook-Ups a Good Idea?

  • Yeah! It's way easier that way.
  • No. Dating is a lot cooler.
  • I've never "hooked up" with anyone.
  • I don't know.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

PuppyLover242
Hmm, okay! Its just that I Love all this new modern things, cute things, chibi stuff, anime pics... and no one else agrees with me? I am like the black sheep or something?
reply about 1 hour
Autonomy
Autonomy posted in Family Issues:
"StarrChild" wrote: Two years ago my parents broke up. I was never really the same after that point. My mother she began to just not care about anything. She would go out clubbing every Friday and would yell at me for my attitude towards it. Why would I be okay with her doing that??? I didn't really realise it but I began feeling kind of depressed. Of course we didn't fight all the time but when we did I would always end up crying alone in my room. And it would be really painful. One time I cried every night for a week because of her. A week ago, I felt really sick at school so I went to the sick bay but my Mum refused to believe I was sick. She thought I was lying and being over dramatic as usual. I felt really horrible after that, that the teacher sent me to the guidance councellor and almost immediately I burst into tears. I didn't even know why I did but the councellor did a little test on me and came to the conclusion I was slightly depressed and had anxiety. It wasn't really surprising but hearing it out loud just felt really weird. Even after knowing that fact my mother doesn't really act any different. She's not a bad person I swear but she can just be really horrible at times. Anyways, that's technically whats been happening in my life lol. Nothing really interesting Oh dear, that sounds like a dreadful situation. I've lived through similar difficulties in my own life, and my heart goes out to you, truly. May I offer you some advice? I don't have the cure to your problems or a magic wand that can make them disappear, but I do believe that some good can come out of your living situation. The first thing I'd like to make note of, is that everyone makes mistakes. As human beings, we have to make mistakes. There's no way around it; it's how we learn and grow. And as we get older, we don't stop making mistakes. Your parents are no exception. Although we look to our parents for guidance, and direction, and support, we have to understand that they aren't perfect people, and they make mistakes. They may not always lead us in the right direction. They may not always set a good example. They may not always be there for us, to encourage us and support us when we need them most. And that's okay. Everyone makes mistakes, and we have to accept that. But we can't let allow other people's mistakes to hurt us, my dear. And I know it hurts. Your mum might not understand how her actions make you feel. You said you haven't been the same since your parents divorced, and I know how challenging that can be to go through. But you know, some of the brightest, wisest, and happiest people I've met, are people who have dealt with difficult problems in their lives, and used them to grow as people. You can let your parents' mistakes get to you, and make you upset and depressed; or, you can accept that they aren't perfect people, accept that they make mistakes, and accept that their mistakes don't have anything to do with you. So here's what you do, friend: you can't stop your mum from going clubbing, and that's okay. Don't try to. Don't fight with her about it. You can let her know how it makes you feel, but don't get into an argument. Accept the situation for what it is. Your mother is her own person, and she is accountable for what she does; you aren't. Next time you start to get in a fight or an argument with her, just step back, and withdraw yourself. Try it, see what happens. Once you decide not to let other peoples' failings affect you--and you do have the power to do this--then you'll find a sense of peace you probably haven't felt before. And you'll learn from your mistakes, and the mistakes of your parents, and everyone around you, and you'll be a better person. Press on.
reply about 12 hours
Dounuts
Dounuts posted in Family Issues:
Go to your neighbor's house and ask him/her to call to police.Everything will be just fine.
reply about 18 hours
RavenClawRaina
my ex is going through the same thing. Call the police now. Things will get out of hand. My brothers friend has been living with us for about 2 weeks becuz his dad punched him in the face. Call 911 now. They will help you. Just say you have been abused by your family member and they will take it from there. If you want, add me and we can talk
reply about 19 hours
XxRuby_PhoenixxX
If you are getting abused to the point where you bleed, call the police immediately. This isn't acceptable behavior.
reply about 19 hours