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Dear Dish-It, I Don't Want to Lose My BF or My BFF

Dear Dish-It,

My best friend likes the same boy I like. She doesn't know I like him though. But the boy likes me back so we decided to be together. I'm worried that my best friend might find out. I don't want to lose my best friend, but I don't want to lose my boyfriend either. What should I do??
mystrygrl


Dear mystrygrl,

You're in a tough situation and no matter what you do, someone's going to get hurt and it'll most likely be your best friend. If you liked the same guy she liked, you should've been honest and upfront from the beginning cuz she probably would've been a lot more understanding about the two of you hookin' up. Sure, she would've been upset that her crush likes someone else (that's you), but she would've appreciated your honesty. But now you've lost that opportunity cuz you went behind her back and started going out with this guy. I suggest you talk to your best friend ASAP and tell her what's going on. The longer you wait, the worse the situation will be cuz she'll hear it from someone else - and there's nothing worse than finding out that your BFF is going out with your crush from some random girl who sits two rows over in Spanish class.


If your best friend is an amazingly understanding and forgiving person, then she'll get over it and be happy for you. But, you should be prepared for the possibility that she may never want to speak to you again. After all, you did betray her by going out with her crush behind her back. I really hope this doesn't happen, but you need to face up to your actions and the choices you've made.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    Lynx_The_Lynx
    Lynx_The_Lynx posted in Friends:
    Okay, since I'm a girl and have helped many of my guy friends with this (even though I think they r too young for this but meh whatever), I can give you some advice.  1) Don't be mean or nice. You have to be yourself. Don't be nasty to her to get her to like you (it won't work), nor should you be Mr Nice Guy. Don't be there to carry her bag for her just yet.  2) If you want her attention, be creative. Writing a song is a good idea, but don't dedicate it to her. Just pretend you're aiming it at the general female population of your class. You can tell her that it's for her later, when she's into you. 3) Find out what she likes. Does she play instruments? Does she do sports? Does she fangirl over stuff? Does she play video games? Find out and DISCREETLY get her to know that you like it too, if you do of course. This is what worked for one of my friends: 1) Stay low until the perfect moment. If she falls over, come over and help her up, smile at her and blow her away with your charms, and then proceed to say hi and ask for her name as if you don't know her. It is creepy when a random guy knows your name and says it to you.... it just is idk. Walk away without looking back. This will make her curious for this stranger who helped her up. Do this for whatever situation. BUT JUST ONCE. DO NOT REPEAT. 2) If this happens again (she falls over etc), be sure to be really obvious that you're not going to help her up. Walk by without sparing a single glance. She will be reminded of you and wonder why didn't you help her. This is good - you want her to think of you. 3) Do something sweet for her. For example, if she likes a particular drink or cheap snack, buy it for her and walk up to her. Give it to her, but say something like "Hey _________! Here you go. I accidentally bought the wrong flavour and didn't want to throw it away. Don't worry - I didn't open it. Do you want it?" She should say yes, and ask for your name to say thank you. That's when you tell her. 4) Start to wave to her in the hallways and say hi sometimes. Don't do this too much though. Sometimes, if she waves first, ignore her. This should make her want your attention more. 5) Do something sweet again (like the song), but aim it not directly towards her (like I already said before - aim it towards girls in general). If you want some more, tell me! I hope this helped, but it might not - depends on what kind of girl she is.
    reply about 1 hour
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