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The Real Deal on Real Love

Check out this scenario. Duffy and K.Lo are tight. They are in love. Duffy gets into trouble and K. Lo bails. They break-up. He is whining. She already has a new boyfriend, before he can change his name to D. Diddy. By now you must be asking yourself, what's up? I thought they were in love?!
What's up is this. Before we can talk about what real love is, let's dish about what it's not.

She loves me NOT

Real love is not based on photo opportunities. In other words, it is deep, not superficial. It is not based only on physical or sexual attraction. Real love doesn't care if your cutie has big dollars or works at Mickey D's. It is based on who you are, not what you do. Real love isn't jealous. Not being jealous is different from not caring. You care - but it's cool if someone says hi to your girl or guy. You don't have to fight to prove to the world what you got. Cuz if it's like that, it ain't real love. Ya dig???

Mom's Love

Now what is real love? Think for a second or two. Imagine someone who loves you, no matter what. They take care of you when you're sick. They feed you when you're hungry. Ya get the picture? I bet that your mom's love for you is real love. When they're getting on your case, you probably don't feel like it is love, you just wish they'd leave you alone. But your mom always has your back. Believe that.

Real love

I think that what happens is when we're little, our moms and pops who love us read us too many fairy tales. You know "happily ever-after" stuff. We think that cupid has this big arrow - and POW!! - an automatic love connection. Well ya know what, it ain't happening. Sometimes ya gotta kiss a lot of toads to find that prince or princess charming. And that's okay because we're going to look at a prescription for real love.

Love RX

  • One dash of "keeping it real". Learn from your experiences. If someone is a jerk to you or your family, lose them quickly. People don't change that much. Real love is about treating yourself and others with respect all of the time.
  • Two dashes of limits. When someone loves you, they don't cross your boundaries. For example, your body is your body. When you say no, that means no. You can and should expect the person you love to follow that. Because real love means listening to what's being said.
  • Three pinches of the Real Deal. Sunshine Anderson sings "I heard it all before, baby this.. baby that... your lies ain't working now." Sunshine is right on. Lies and real love don't go together. Real love is about truth and honesty, even if it hurts. If they're lying, kick 'em to the curb.
  • A big scoop of 'whatever'. By whatever, I mean try to keep things in the moment. Don't be bringing up the past all the time - stuff like he said, she said. Learn to enjoy your time together. If it's meant to be, it will be.
  • Mix all of the above with self-control. Slow down, love will happen for you. Know yourself and what you want and deserve from your life. Don't settle for less. Remember, the more you love yourself, the better love you can give.
    Oh - and go give your mom a hug.

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  • 18 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    Everybodydotheflop
    At home I tend to talk a LOT, but  the complete opposite at school, this is the reason I have little to no friends, I used to have a best friend but she moved.
    reply 13 minutes
    lirescar789
    lirescar789 posted in Friends:
    Dear dish It: What'll should you do to be able to catch up with up with their topic cause when they'll ask, you're answering nonsense.. 
    reply about 13 hours
    IndigoTiger19
    Thanks so much delancy
    reply about 15 hours
    Delancy
    Delancy posted in Family Issues:
    Dear Friend, I am really sad about your matter. Ignore them. Yes, I do understand your feelings. You care for your family, everyone does. But Family isn't always right. If you pay attention to them you may get addicted to alc*hol too. It's normal for every person to care for their family, kith and kin. But not every person whom you care is good. I am totally not talking anything bad about your mom or you sister. But I've experienced this in my own family. Hope my message helped you out. It was a pleasure to help you out :) Thanks, Siyali (Delancy)
    reply about 15 hours
    IndigoTiger19
    I grew up around violence, dr*gs and alc*hol and my mum was always fighting and on dr*gs she stopped ages ago but still drink's sometimes and these days I still think she is doing dr*gs still. My sister is addicted to dr*gs (but I wont' say what kind ) and is using them nearly every day. I know I shouldn't be getting into my mum's/sisters business but I am really worried. The other day we went and picked up my sister (who is 22 just to let you know) to go and get something for here down the street and before she got out of the car she said to my mum have u got any dot and I knew what it meant I am really worried about them and don't know what to do.
    reply about 16 hours

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