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Posted By:
ShyFox Lock
ShyFox
Member since:
October 2013
Status:
Offline

Posts: 4
Star
Posted over 2 years ago
i really want feedback for this, it's my first poem I've put on here, I hope you like it:

​Listen,
Just shout your mouth and listen,
Just for a second,
Turn around,
I've been standing behind you for ten minutes,
Tapping you on the shoulder,
Asking you a question,
Its really important,
But you don't care,
Don't care that I'm your best friend,
Don't care that I need your help,
Don't care that I'm the one who has helped you a thousand times before,
Because you have a new friend now,
And suddenly I don't matter,
Suddenly I'm invisible,
To everyone,
But this is important,
So just shut your mouth and listen,
I need your help...

ShyFox
Read. Write. Listen. Live. Doodle.This is who I am, get over it smile


Posted By:
Baby260_1746383 Lock
Baby260_1746383
Member since:
April 2011
Status:
Offline

Posts: 12306
StarStarStarStarStar
Posted over 2 years ago
la


Posted By:
BuzzJuzz
BuzzJuzz
Member since:
March 2013
Status:
Offline

Posts: 447
StarStarStarStar
Posted over 2 years ago
its just cool! sweet n short! Wink





You can find love through her songs


Posted By:
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen
Junior Mod
Member since:
June 2013
Status:
Offline

Posts: 8145
StarStarStarStarStar
Posted over 2 years ago
It's pretty good. smile


sig


Posted By:
dogfobia
dogfobia
Member since:
December 2012
Status:
Offline

Posts: 593
StarStarStarStar
Posted over 2 years ago
wow thats really good

louDumb PeasantLouliam and louis slipping

And I'll be gone gone tonight
The fire beneath my feet is burning bright
The way that I been holdin' on so tight
With nothing in between ~ Story of My Life by 1D


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