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Dear Dish-It: My BFF Is Gay

Apr 20, 2009

Dear Dish-It,

My BFF told me she wanted to get together with another girl. I thought she was joking, so I said, “I’m into guys, so...” And she answered, “Well, I’m not.” She asked me if that was a problem. I lied and said no. The truth is, I don't really have a problem with it except I'm a girl and it’s a little awkward. Also, my dad is very Christian and I’m scared if I tell him my BFF is gay he won’t let me hang out with her anymore. What should I do?

true2myself


Dear true2myself,


I hope you don’t really have a problem with your BFF liking girls or, perhaps, being gay. The fact that you are a girl shouldn’t matter (it certainly doesn’t mean that she is crushing on you – most likely, she still considers you just a friend and always will). Neither should it matter what your parents’ beliefs are. You are your own person and you need to decide what is right and wrong on your own. The only thing that matters in this situation is that you continue to be a good, caring and understanding friend, and that you continue to support your BFF in anything she chooses to feel or do (as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone else, that is), just as she would support you. As for your father, well, I don’t really understand why your friend’s sexuality is something you would need to discuss with him. If he asks about it, you may have to tell him the truth, but if he doesn’t ask, it doesn’t seem like it’s any of his business. The only person who should reveal information about her sexuality to anyone else is your BFF. It’s simply not your place to tell other people on her behalf, without her permission. I hope that helps.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.


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