×
Back left
Back right

Dear Dish-It, How Long Will We Just Be Friends?

Dec 27, 2006

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl when I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

I am one of those guys who are not too weird or too cool but I have friends who are cool. They have girlfriends - I don't. I have never been on a date before in my life and I am 12. Anyway, there is this very cute girl who everyone likes. I want to know two things: one, how do I act to get a girl? And how do I act on a date? I am also one of those funny people around my friends but not really in front of girls. Please help.
help kid


Dear help kid,

Before I let you in on the secrets of getting a girl, I want to let you know that there is nothing wrong with never having been on a date at 12. You're super young and if I were you, I'd hold off even longer before getting all tangled up in the world of love and dating. Sure it's cool to have a girl to take the movies or talk to on the phone, but you can do all those things without committing to one specific person. Hang out with lots of people, girls and boys, and just have a good time. If you put too much pressure on getting a certain girl's attention, you are just going to stress yourself out and your issue of freezing up around girls is not going to get any better. So, to get a girl (who'll like you for you,) you have to be yourself. Don't put on an act, a show or a fancy costume - just act as you would around your friends! The same goes for how you act on a date. If a girl has agreed to go out with you, then they are looking forward to spending time with the guy that asked them out and no one else. Good Luck!


Dear Dish-It,

I don't usually make use of such sites as this, but in this case, I am desperate. I've had an interest in a particular female for some time now. I finally got my courage up to ask her out. Her reply was the well known, "Let's be friends first." This wasn't a problem in the beginning, since I wanted to get to know her better, anyway. The problem is, the more I get to know her, the more I like her. We have an incredible amount in common and she amazes me everyday with something new. How long does this "just be friends" thing last?
wildkarrde88


Dear wildkarrde88,

Ok, there are two possible reasons for this girl's response of, "let's be friends first." One, she likes you and wants to get to know you better but isn't quite ready to make the GF/BF commitment. Two, she just wants to be friends, and isn't interested in more, but doesn't want to hurt your feelings. So, depending on which scenario you find yourself in, the "just be friends" thing could last just a little while longer or indefinitely. Although this may not work in your favor, you should probably ask her to spell out her feelings. If she's just leading you on, you'll want to know sooner rather than later so you can decide where to go from there - continue on just as friends or cut her loose. So, talk to her and find out what the score is. Good Luck!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


Related Stories:

  • Dear Dish-It: Dating - Should I Dump My Guy?
  • Dear Dish-It: Dating - Does She Think I'm An Outcast?
  • Dear Dish-It: Dating - Girls Say I'm Ugly
  • More Great Advice from Dish-It!