Movie Review - Planet of the Apes
The big bad apes are teaming up with Mark Wahlberg to bring a new version of the Planet of the Apes to a screen near you. It has action, adventure and apes galore. So how does it rate?
I'm a big fan of apes. Sometimes I even make ape noises when I get excited so I was totally psyched to catch this movie. It's a big-budget, big-name remake of the 1968 classic, Planet of the Apes. This time Mark Wahlberg is off on a wild journey to the Planet of the Apes. The lights dimmed, the curtain parted and I settled down in my theater seat with a jumbo bag of popcorn and a banana.
Wow is it pretty! The special effects look incredible. Everything from the high-tech spaceships to the massive forests are wicked. Rick Baker's ape outfits really look wild - from the massive gorilla Attar (Michael Clark Duncan) to the dainty Ari (Helena Bonham Carter) and psycho-ape Thade (Tim Roth.) They're almost real. With a little help from special effects they leap from tree to tree and ROAR at the humans. They even walk like apes - shuffling around with bent knees or racing around on all fours. Ape girls have facial hair though, ew...
Once you get over how cool the apes look, things start to get cheesy. The story has holes in it and the romance is just plain silly. People were laughing out loud in the kissing scenes, cuz even Mark Wahlberg looks funny kissing an ape. The ending was a big special effects bonanza and fight scene. It was really cool, but the 'Secret Weapon' really bothered me. There's no way it would've worked in the first place and when it did work it looked like it should've done a lot more damage. The huge fight almost made up for it though. If you've ever wondered why a 500-pound gorilla can do whatever he wants, this'll show you.
If you're in the mood for some monkey mayhem check this out. It looks great and has some cool action but it's not gonna be as famous as the original. It does have Charlton Heston though. If you don't know who he is ask your mom and dad, they'll know.
Planet of the Apes Movie Rating: