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Spare a Square?

How often have you been stuck in a public bathroom stall with no toilet paper after doin' your business? What do you do? This embarrassing situation is common among all of us but rarely talked about. I'm here to expose the already exposed, but in a slightly different way.

Here are some ways to deal with the situation:

1) Before you even start to pee you should check to see if there is any toilet paper, but I know that us crazy humans forget to do this all the time. So if you forgot to check and you're stuck:

  • Peer underneath the stall walls to see if anyone is there. But make sure you don't peer too far because you don't wanna invade anyone's privacy. If someone's there, you're set. Ask them if they can "Spare a Square," as Seinfeld's Elaine says, and you're set.
  • If no one's there, things get a little more uncomfortable. There are still options but they ain't pretty. You can:

a) Drip-dry. But of course this only applies if peein' is all you've been doin'.

b) Venture off into the wild depths of the tile-laden jungle with your pants around your ankles, searching for the TP that lies in the surrounding stalls. The problem with this is that, well... your pants are around your ankles because doin' 'em up could get messy. So this technique has to be done as quick as possible to avoid someone walking in on you and your assets.

c) If you think someone walking in on you would be way too hard to deal with, there are ways to get around it... if you're limber. You can do the "duck and roll" underneath the stall wall, or you can climb over top of it. Of course, if you get stuck in either position it would automatically be on your "most embarrassing moments" list.

d) Then there's my personal worst way to deal with the no TP situation. It's using that awful, hard cardboard tube that is left over when all the soft cushiness of toilet paper is gone. Frankly, this solution sucks. It's half a solution because it has no absorbing qualities and the risk of clogging the toilet is huge.

e) And if any of you have travelled to India, you'll know that finding toilet paper in the stalls there is weirder than not finding it here. They don't wipe, they splash. Keep it in mind.

Whatever decision you make won't be easy. Just go for it with confidence and you'll be fine, and hopefully dry.

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What Would Be Worse?

  • No toilet paper?
  • No milk for your cereal?
  • No toothpaste?
  • You're asking me to choose?!

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

gymnasts123
Everytime I ask my dad for something, its no. Yesterday I asked if I could go to the 5sos concert, he said no, and I asked why. He said there was no one to take me. My friend offered to take me, since she is going. I asked for money for the ticket, and he asked how much it was. I said it was $24, and he said that is too much and that he just bought me a phone yesterday. (my phone was an update, IT WAS 99 CENTS!) My friend then offered to pay for my ticket, and I told her I couldnt let her do it, she has bought me too many things already. WHat d0 i do? How do I convince my parents? It will be my first concert.
reply about 1 hour
disney princess
"Delancey" wrote:I'm sorry to hear this , but I think you should talk with your teachers. It's really annoying, and I guess you shouldn't care for whatever they say. You're pretty, you're beautiful in your own way. Um, I guess you should talk with teachers/adults about it and I know it'll be tough for you, but ignore what they say and just be you!  
reply about 6 hours
Delancey
Delancey posted in Friends:
I'm sorry to hear this , but I think you should talk with your teachers. It's really annoying, and I guess you shouldn't care for whatever they say. You're pretty, you're beautiful in your own way. Um, I guess you should talk with teachers/adults about it and I know it'll be tough for you, but ignore what they say and just be you!
reply about 7 hours
Gamer_GTA
Gamer_GTA posted in Friends:
throughout school I have always been picked on weither it be because of my interests or just my personality. In middle school I was called ####### everyday by all the guys in my grade. One of my teachers even bullied me and my mom never believed me because my teacher was so nice to her... I ended up crying on the 3rd day of my freshman year because the kids in my class were so mean to me... I'm gonna be a sophomore in highschool this year and I really don't want to go back to school because I'm afraid that it will be a repeat of freshman year... I need advice on how to make the best of the rest of school if I have to deal with the people that bully me...
reply about 22 hours
PinkaLicous123
PinkaLicous123 posted in Friends:
Like my sisters says Give him a hard time and if he cant handle it then he's NOT worth it..... your welcome.
reply about 23 hours

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