Kw-logo-smaller

Spare a Square?

How often have you been stuck in a public bathroom stall with no toilet paper after doin' your business? What do you do? This embarrassing situation is common among all of us but rarely talked about. I'm here to expose the already exposed, but in a slightly different way.

Here are some ways to deal with the situation:

1) Before you even start to pee you should check to see if there is any toilet paper, but I know that us crazy humans forget to do this all the time. So if you forgot to check and you're stuck:

  • Peer underneath the stall walls to see if anyone is there. But make sure you don't peer too far because you don't wanna invade anyone's privacy. If someone's there, you're set. Ask them if they can "Spare a Square," as Seinfeld's Elaine says, and you're set.
  • If no one's there, things get a little more uncomfortable. There are still options but they ain't pretty. You can:

a) Drip-dry. But of course this only applies if peein' is all you've been doin'.

b) Venture off into the wild depths of the tile-laden jungle with your pants around your ankles, searching for the TP that lies in the surrounding stalls. The problem with this is that, well... your pants are around your ankles because doin' 'em up could get messy. So this technique has to be done as quick as possible to avoid someone walking in on you and your assets.

c) If you think someone walking in on you would be way too hard to deal with, there are ways to get around it... if you're limber. You can do the "duck and roll" underneath the stall wall, or you can climb over top of it. Of course, if you get stuck in either position it would automatically be on your "most embarrassing moments" list.

d) Then there's my personal worst way to deal with the no TP situation. It's using that awful, hard cardboard tube that is left over when all the soft cushiness of toilet paper is gone. Frankly, this solution sucks. It's half a solution because it has no absorbing qualities and the risk of clogging the toilet is huge.

e) And if any of you have travelled to India, you'll know that finding toilet paper in the stalls there is weirder than not finding it here. They don't wipe, they splash. Keep it in mind.

Whatever decision you make won't be easy. Just go for it with confidence and you'll be fine, and hopefully dry.

Related Stories:

 

12 Comments

latest videos

F1016584228281

What Would Be Worse?

  • No toilet paper?
  • No milk for your cereal?
  • No toothpaste?
  • You're asking me to choose?!

related stories

Micro_shame_micro
Kidzworld’s Hall of Shame is back – and better than ever! We’re inviting all Kidzworld Members to...
Micro_shame_micro
Kidzworld’s Hall of Shame is back – and better than ever! We’re inviting all Kidzworld Members to...
An argument’s broken out about where astronauts can go to the washroom at the International Space...
It's important to wash your hands after doing your business in the washroom to prevent the spread...

Dear Dish-It in the forums

hugebear
hugebear posted in Friends:
Congratulations on being gifted and getting all the opportunties what your getting :) You knows your friends better than any of us and how does you think they will react if you tell them?  Thinks about if one of your friends told you and how you would feel.  Be proud and enjoy your learning and you will meet other gifted people too in your classes and ask them their experiences too of how/if they told friends. If it was me then I probably wouldnt but thats just me personality. I wouldnt ever get in the gifted group anyway so I doesnt really have to think about this :)
reply about 1 hour
__dischic3__
__dischic3__ posted in Style:
today I got my hair down...chillin'
reply about 8 hours
Teh_Skittlez
Teh_Skittlez posted in Friends:
Don't go out of your way to talk about it. A lot of people are off put by people who talk about their intelligence a lot. If it comes up in a conversation, you can talk about it, but you probably won't need to tell them. Usually with people who are genuinely intelligent, they don't need to talk about their intelligence, it's obvious to everyone around you, and therefore people who are not as intelligent might feel like you're rubbing it in. 
reply about 16 hours
jordand08
jordand08 posted in Friends:
Maybe you should wait until you feel a little bit more comfy talking to them, and then tell them!  :D
reply about 16 hours
totalgeek
totalgeek posted in Friends:
There is a slight issue with that. I am rarely comfortable talking with children my own age.
reply about 16 hours

play online games