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Dear Dish-It: My Friend Gossips

Dear Dish-It,

My friend is always talking about guys she’s crushing on or other girls that we know. I’ve told her she should try talking about other things but she doesn’t listen. What should I do?

gtorino

Dear GT,

Sounds like your friend is quite the gossip. What exactly is gossip? Well, gossip is casual talk about other people and their personal matters and affairs. There is “good gossip,” which basically just provides basic information about other people and what they’re up to, and then there’s “bad gossip,” which is essentially good gossip turned bad. In other words, bad gossip happens when all that casual talk turns harmful. The thing about bad gossip is that it has the ability to spread and affect everything it touches – in a bad way.

Most kids your age feel that if everyone else is doing it, and if they see and hear it everywhere, then gossip can’t be such a bad thing, can it? Maybe this is what your friend thinks, and why she can’t stop gossiping about other people even when you ask her to. Maybe if you gave your friend some more information and facts about how much bad gossip can affect people she’ll be more inclined to stop. Here is some information that may help you stop your friend from gossiping in the future.

How Gossip Affects Those Being Gossiped About

  • It can ruin their reputation
  • It can humiliate them
  • It can raise doubts and cause mistrust
  • It can destroy friendships
  • It can expose secrets that should be kept private
  • It can make people feel bad about themselves
  • It can cause low self-esteem … or worse

How Gossip Affects Those Doing The Gossiping

  • It can give them a bad reputation as someone who’s mean and not trustworthy
  • It can make them lose friends
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How Often Do You Gossip?

  • Every second of the day.
  • Only when I hear something really juicy.
  • I try not to gossip about people cuz it's mean.
  • Never - I know how to keep my mouth shut.

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

AnneS12
AnneS12 posted in Family Issues:
Well That is your choice who you want to stay with.Nobody can force you about it.When your parents see a family<a data-cke-saved-href=" lawyer, then he will ask you whom do you want to stay with and jury will decide.So dont worry .
reply about 11 hours
worldqweencc
worldqweencc posted in Friends:
I'm not quiet sure what's a real friend and what's a fake one anymore. I know when there's a friend who's only a school friend rather than an 'outside' friend as well, but at the same time it makes me so confused. Here's my story: There's a girl named Xian. We had a unique way of becoming friends ... but it clicked. For the whole year I've been trying to keep in contact with her ... but she's not very willing to try and put in any effort to stay in contact with me. Her personality is beyond sweet, and her skills at art are even better. If she was to have an award, it would be a giant trophy with her face plastered on it and big bold letters listing 'Nicest Girl In The World!' ... Its just ... she lied to me.  I was all about this friendship. I was ... i'll admit ... sort of a lost puppy following around her owner.  So, I got her this T-Shirt she really wanted for her birthday, and not long her birthday was mine, April First. I was expecting at least a letter, or maybe even something cheap. It didn't really matter to me.  But on my birthday she didn't even come to school. Nor when she got back did she ever say sorry, or give me any be-lated gift of any sort.  That should have been my first clue. Even my mother started catching on. My second clue was she even told me she was oblivious and wasn't good at keeping in contact. I thought she was joking. How could a friendship so sweet be tossed out just like that? My third one was near the end of school, one of her friends in elementary was bragging about the plushies she got from Xian. Apparently she had four from her.  Xian had originally told me it was AGAINST her religion to give out gifts to other people. I knew she wasn't lying about her religion in general, because I met her mom on a field trip and she was quiet ... different. But I didn't understand why Xian had gotten so many small plushies for her, and yet not a single small stamp for me? My last clue was the last day of school. She didn't even try to say good-bye or even hang out with me for that matter. I know what you're thinking. "Girl, you've gotta be kidding me if you can't see that she has no intention of being your friend!" But this girl was the nicest to me. She stood next to me during harsh times, and comforted me when I was down. She told me I was important.  And you don't get many friends to do those special things to you. It was rare to have a friend make me feel so tall and worthy.  ... So ... I can't understand ... why'd she do all that .... and suddenly ... just ... walk away ...
reply 1 day
catsandpizza
catsandpizza posted in Style:
American Apparel croptop, Juicy Couture velvet sweatpants and Uggs
reply 1 day
Heyyyyy_
Heyyyyy_ posted in Friends:
"donteatcarrots" wrote:I dunno, looks like something more than being friends is going on here. It's probably best to ask her face-to-face though, before jumping to conclusions. ^^^
reply 1 day
catsandpizza
catsandpizza posted in Friends:
depends 
reply 1 day

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