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Dear Dish-It: My Friend Gossips

Dear Dish-It,

My friend is always talking about guys she’s crushing on or other girls that we know. I’ve told her she should try talking about other things but she doesn’t listen. What should I do?

gtorino

Dear GT,

Sounds like your friend is quite the gossip. What exactly is gossip? Well, gossip is casual talk about other people and their personal matters and affairs. There is “good gossip,” which basically just provides basic information about other people and what they’re up to, and then there’s “bad gossip,” which is essentially good gossip turned bad. In other words, bad gossip happens when all that casual talk turns harmful. The thing about bad gossip is that it has the ability to spread and affect everything it touches – in a bad way.

Most kids your age feel that if everyone else is doing it, and if they see and hear it everywhere, then gossip can’t be such a bad thing, can it? Maybe this is what your friend thinks, and why she can’t stop gossiping about other people even when you ask her to. Maybe if you gave your friend some more information and facts about how much bad gossip can affect people she’ll be more inclined to stop. Here is some information that may help you stop your friend from gossiping in the future.

How Gossip Affects Those Being Gossiped About

  • It can ruin their reputation
  • It can humiliate them
  • It can raise doubts and cause mistrust
  • It can destroy friendships
  • It can expose secrets that should be kept private
  • It can make people feel bad about themselves
  • It can cause low self-esteem … or worse

How Gossip Affects Those Doing The Gossiping

  • It can give them a bad reputation as someone who’s mean and not trustworthy
  • It can make them lose friends
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How Often Do You Gossip?

  • Every second of the day.
  • Only when I hear something really juicy.
  • I try not to gossip about people cuz it's mean.
  • Never - I know how to keep my mouth shut.

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Heyyyyy_
Heyyyyy_ posted in Friends:
i mean, theres no way reason for her to get upset bc u hav to think about school before anything social. so all u hav to do is tell her hey im sry but i rly hav to work on school right now and once i get tht situated then maybe i can come over to ur house and stay the night.
reply 13 minutes
BeautifulPixels
My best friend is always wanting me to spend the night at her house, but because she keeps irritating me about it, i can't get my school work done and now i'm falling behind. How do I tell her how I feel without hurting her feelings?
reply 18 minutes
Heyyyyy_
Heyyyyy_ posted in Friends:
well it most likely depends on y they get mad at u in the first place.
reply about 2 hours
nini8988
nini8988 posted in Friends:
Almost every time I'm in gym my friends end up getting mad at me and they don't talk to me and then they forgive me and something else happens to ruin it
reply about 3 hours
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
"sparkly_chick" wrote: I keep saying stupid things and messing up with my friends and now they hate me. /.\ Don't say "they don't deserve you" or something, because I don't deserve them. They're great friends and I'm just... stupid. I'm sorry dear but things do get better and its not your fault. Everyone messes up, its just a part a life. If you need to talk and explain to me with more info you can, I'm here. :)    ^^This. You're not stupid either. Everybody makes mistakes and messes things up.
reply about 11 hours

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