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Dear Dish-It, My Friend Dumped Me

Dear Dish-It,

I am 14 years old and I have two best friends. In school I had friends, but they were the not so popular kids. I finally found this one girl who seemed really nice but then started being mean. There are these two other girls who she always hangs with and never calls me or anything - and then she started talking about me behind my back. When we are alone we usually get along but when another person is around she ignores me and I am the one usually left out and she doesn't seem to care. But if I stop being her friend then I am scared I won't have any. I want to be popular. Can you tell me how to get over her and how to make new friends. Thank you so much.
In need of help


Dear In need of help,

I'm a little confused by your letter. First you say you have two best friends, then you say you're worried about having no friends. Listen, even if this girl who is mean to you is your only friend in the universe, you are better off without her damage. She's not a friend at all. It sounds kinda like she's using you - for what I don't know. Maybe she's got no self-esteem and always has to be around someone so she calls you to fill the space. Maybe she does really like you but is scared you won't fit in with her other peeps. In the end, her reason for the cruelty isn't as important as the fact that she is, in fact, a brat to you.


It's going to be hard but you need to let go. If she's popular it's not for the right reasons cuz she's obviously not a very nice person. And what exactly is popular anyway? To me, it's being better than normal at being average. Popular people aren't usually the ones who stand-out cuz they do their own thing. I know right now it seems like what every single person in school (including your janitor) thinks of you is important, but in the long run - it ain't. Take a chill pill when it comes to the quest for popularity and focus your energy on being a good person and finding good peeps to hang with. In the end, you'll enjoy your teen years a lot more.


Dear Dish-It,

Me and my friend Lauren WERE friends for 11 1/2 years, then two years ago she stopped talking to me. I thought she was just busy. So one day I had a different friend come over (April) and me and her were playing in the snow. Lauren came out with her neighbor and started a fight with me and April! They said we have no friends (which isn't true) and everything. Then, a different day, Lauren did it again on the school bus and me and April told the assistant principal, and the assistant principal talked to Lauren, but it didn't help at all. I just got a two month-old beagle puppy and Lauren came over to see the puppy and when I'm around my mom she acts like and angel but she isn't. I really want to be friends with her again but she doesn't want to be friends with me. I miss her and our friendship. How can I talk to Lauren without her getting an attitude? *Cries* I miss Lauren. Even though she lives right next to me, I'm nervous to talk to her and ask her if we can be friends again! HELP! *cries some more*
dreamstreethotgrl


Dear dreamstreethotgrl,

Why in the world do you still want to be friends with a girl who is bent on making you miserable? Come on, girlfriend, I don't even know you and I know you deserve better. Here's the dealio - the Lauren you know doesn't want to come out and play anymore. She's turned into a different person for some reason and this person ain't at all sugar and spice - or anything nice. It's okay to miss her and stuff, but I would just move on. You could always write her a letter, since she lives next door. I'd just say something like: "Look Lauren, I thought we were great friends and I loved hanging with you but you've changed and you're mean and I can't hang with you like that. If you ever want to try and be my friend again, let me know. If not let it go and don't keep buggin me, K?" Leave it at that. That way you get to say your peace and not deal with her 'tude. Good luck and keep hanging with April and your other nice friends. Give your beagle a pat for me!


So, ya got a burnin' question? Need some love direction? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex, how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. But remember, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your "username," ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one will ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters every day, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble! Oh! And if ya got words of wisdom you wanna share, we'll dish 'em up, too.


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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    rainbowpoptart
    rainbowpoptart posted in Style:
    Hello Amelia! Fellow natural ginger here. Your hair is a gorgeous colour and I don't blame your parents for not wanting you to dye it. How about the dye only be temporary? It won't stay on forever, so you'll have your cool rainbow colours and still have your natural colour. I do need to warn you, though, don't dye your hair too much. It's not good for your scalp. Good luck. :)
    reply about 13 hours
    Pink_Cool_Girl
    Pink_Cool_Girl posted in Style:
    They know what is best for you. But if you really wanna dye your hair, you should compromise with them. Like for instance: tell them you can dye the bottom of your hair the color, and then when you get older, you could maybe dye a little more, and so on. But your parents know what's best for you, and they want you to look presentable.                       ~PCG :)
    reply about 15 hours
    PaytonTehPanda
    PaytonTehPanda posted in Style:
    Hello players of KidzWorld! I am Amelia, feel free to call me Payton or whatever you'd like! So, let us jump right into this! :D -=+=- I have natural ginger hair and really, REALLY strict parents. I would like to dye my hair this blue color called "Atomic Turquoise" by Maniac Panic :) However, my parents don't want me to dye my hair as they think that these colors look "trashy". Girls whom I know, have dyed hair. One of them even has piercings I want. Another has had her hair every color of the rainbow and more! So, my parents are very strict and quite... I don't even know. They won't allow me to do anything really... Does anyone have anything I can use to have my parents allow me to dye my hair? Thank you! :D <3 ~Payton
    reply about 15 hours
    donteatcarrots
    donteatcarrots posted in Style:
    lisp or not, i'm sure you're a nice person. i don't even know if you can get rid of this lisp- maybe practice speaking at home, try different movements with your lips or mouth, i don't know. don't let a lisp make you less confident, that doesn't change anything about you as a person. be yourself and be confident.
    reply 2 days
    Ezma
    Ezma posted in Style:
    Dear Dish it, Im already a grown teen but I don't think I am that easy to get along whem meeting new friends in school. And I think its because I lose my confidence cause I got some speech defect which called lisp. I often sometimes looks weird when theyre talking to me and It really affects me. What should I do? I have read and tried all the practice and therapy I read in the internet for a year but it doesnt make a change. I hope you help me
    reply 2 days