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Dear Dish-It, Are My Friends Gay?

Dear Dish-It,

I went to a sleepover party at my friend's house and he invited 1 more guy. We were in his room at 12 AM, just us 3 guys, and they decide to play strip crazy 8s. Doing it with girls is bad but just guys is gay and bad (or so I think.) I refused to play. They got down to their boxers and quit. Then they started to show each other their privates! I didn't. So my real problem is, 1 of them is going out with my ex girlfriend - so now he's gay and going out with my ex! Me and my ex are good friends now. Should I tell her? And, what went on with them 2, does that make them gay?
homieg222

Dear homieg222,

Okay, this is obviously really buggin' ya... relax, your buds are not gay. Sometimes, when guys are growing up (girls too) they do stupid things like show each other their "privates." It doesn't necessarily indicate anything about their sexuality - it's more of a curiosity thing. If I were you, I would definitely NOT tell your ex. First off, your bud (her BF) probably is NOT gay. Secondly, it's not your place to "out" anyone even if they are gay (which this guy is not.) Now, I have a question to you - would it make a difference if your buddies were gay? Aren't they still the same people who you've hung out with, liked and had good times with? Sounds like you might be a lil' on the 'phobic.

Dear Dish-It,

I'm only 15 but I want to have a baby. I know it's hard work but I babysit all the time - sometimes up to a week or more! And, I home school. My boyfriend just proposed to me, so I don't see the prob. I just don't know how to tell my parents... Need help, soon!
kam2087

Dear kam2087,

You don't see the problem? Well allow me to bring up a few of the problems for you.

#1

How would you support a baby? At 15 you're not really able to get the type of job you'd need to support a small child.

#2

How are you going to finish school? It's a huge responsibility having a child and there isn't going to be a lot of time for homework or school. If you did continue school, who would look after the baby? Remember this is your responsibility and you can't rely on your parents for everything.

#3

Where would you live? Your parents probably aren't going to be very supportive of you having a child so young. If they kick you out, where would you go? A place of your own would be expensive and wouldn't leave much money left over for things like food, life, and diapers.

This may seem harsh, but you know what? It's not. It's half of the big-time problems and issues that you'll be going through as a young mom. So you don't know how to tell your parents? Just say, "Hey mom and dad, I'm thinking I want to have a baby." They should know what your thinking so they have a chance to talk some sense into you too.

Yo, you think your friend's are gay?,

Wow, you should confront them about it seriously before something happens that is so gross that you won't want to be friends anymore. So ask 'em or else.

Kidz Submit By:

Nickname: kewlsportsgirl
Age: 12

Dear kewlsportsgirl,

It looks like both you and homieg222 are jumping to conclusions here. Chances are, homieg222's friends aren't gay but even if they are, who cares. That doesn't make them gross or weird or less cool then they always have been. The world would be a much happier place if there wasn't so much hatin'.

So you want to have a kid?,

But you feel it would be hard to take care of. So I would just wait until you feel the time is right. I would not know how you feel though cuz I am only 12 years old. I dont really worry about that kind of stuff. And about your parents, just tell them that he proposed to you and you really love him, and feel the time is right and your ready for marriage! Well good luck and all, bye!

Kidz Submit By:

Nickname: kewlsportsgirl
Age: 12

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .

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Best Time To Have Kids?

  • At any age as long as you've got a good BF.
  • When you're married - NOT before!
  • Not sure. Maybe when you're older and mature and stuff.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Autonomy
Autonomy posted in Family Issues:
"StarrChild" wrote: Two years ago my parents broke up. I was never really the same after that point. My mother she began to just not care about anything. She would go out clubbing every Friday and would yell at me for my attitude towards it. Why would I be okay with her doing that??? I didn't really realise it but I began feeling kind of depressed. Of course we didn't fight all the time but when we did I would always end up crying alone in my room. And it would be really painful. One time I cried every night for a week because of her. A week ago, I felt really sick at school so I went to the sick bay but my Mum refused to believe I was sick. She thought I was lying and being over dramatic as usual. I felt really horrible after that, that the teacher sent me to the guidance councellor and almost immediately I burst into tears. I didn't even know why I did but the councellor did a little test on me and came to the conclusion I was slightly depressed and had anxiety. It wasn't really surprising but hearing it out loud just felt really weird. Even after knowing that fact my mother doesn't really act any different. She's not a bad person I swear but she can just be really horrible at times. Anyways, that's technically whats been happening in my life lol. Nothing really interesting Oh dear, that sounds like a dreadful situation. I've lived through similar difficulties in my own life, and my heart goes out to you, truly. May I offer you some advice? I don't have the cure to your problems or a magic wand that can make them disappear, but I do believe that some good can come out of your living situation. The first thing I'd like to make note of, is that everyone makes mistakes. As human beings, we have to make mistakes. There's no way around it; it's how we learn and grow. And as we get older, we don't stop making mistakes. Your parents are no exception. Although we look to our parents for guidance, and direction, and support, we have to understand that they aren't perfect people, and they make mistakes. They may not always lead us in the right direction. They may not always set a good example. They may not always be there for us, to encourage us and support us when we need them most. And that's okay. Everyone makes mistakes, and we have to accept that. But we can't let allow other people's mistakes to hurt us, my dear. And I know it hurts. Your mum might not understand how her actions make you feel. You said you haven't been the same since your parents divorced, and I know how challenging that can be to go through. But you know, some of the brightest, wisest, and happiest people I've met, are people who have dealt with difficult problems in their lives, and used them to grow as people. You can let your parents' mistakes get to you, and make you upset and depressed; or, you can accept that they aren't perfect people, accept that they make mistakes, and accept that their mistakes don't have anything to do with you. So here's what you do, friend: you can't stop your mum from going clubbing, and that's okay. Don't try to. Don't fight with her about it. You can let her know how it makes you feel, but don't get into an argument. Accept the situation for what it is. Your mother is her own person, and she is accountable for what she does; you aren't. Next time you start to get in a fight or an argument with her, just step back, and withdraw yourself. Try it, see what happens. Once you decide not to let other peoples' failings affect you--and you do have the power to do this--then you'll find a sense of peace you probably haven't felt before. And you'll learn from your mistakes, and the mistakes of your parents, and everyone around you, and you'll be a better person. Press on.
reply about 8 hours
Dounuts
Dounuts posted in Family Issues:
Go to your neighbor's house and ask him/her to call to police.Everything will be just fine.
reply about 14 hours
RavenClawRaina
my ex is going through the same thing. Call the police now. Things will get out of hand. My brothers friend has been living with us for about 2 weeks becuz his dad punched him in the face. Call 911 now. They will help you. Just say you have been abused by your family member and they will take it from there. If you want, add me and we can talk
reply about 15 hours
XxRuby_PhoenixxX
If you are getting abused to the point where you bleed, call the police immediately. This isn't acceptable behavior.
reply about 15 hours
MRAP
MRAP posted in Family Issues:
Hey, Just wanted some advice to help me on what to do on this. Ever since I was 3 I've been both Verbally, Mentally, And Physically abused. To me, this is normal since it's been happening for so long. But I just can't take this thing anymore. When I get home I always get yelled at for no reason. I have been on Anti-Depressants for the past 1-2 years. Been going to counseling for 6-7 years for family. Nothing has changed yet. I just need help on how to handle this. Thanks.
reply about 15 hours