-
x

Meet New Friends!

Recommended friends are based on your interests. Make sure they are up to date.

Friends
Kidzworld Logo

Dear Dish-It: Scared and Paranoid

Dear Dish-it,

I live in Japan, where the huge earthquake hit about three or four weeks ago, and I'm getting totally scared. The aftershocks and the nuclear situation is really getting scary. Every time I hear the earthquake warning, I jump right out of my skin and start sprinting off outside. How do I overcome my fear?

WorriedAsUsual19

Dear WorriedAsUsual19,

I’m sorry to hear about your fear, but I’m really happy that you’re OK! Being scared after a major disaster like the earthquake and tsunami that recently occurred in Japan is totally normal…and there are some things you can do to help overcome your worries.

Talk A Lot

The first thing you can do to make yourself feel better is talk to someone about it! Tell your mom, dad or another adult that you trust what your concerns are and why. If your friends feel the same way as you do, talking to them can help as well – just try not to get each other all worked up over nothing. Talking about your feelings with others can be a great way to take the load of your chest and come up with other ways to cope.

Reassure Yourself

Talking to yourself can help, too. I don’t mean you should walk around muttering under your breath (!); maybe before you go to sleep every night or when you wake up in the morning you can say to yourself, “I’m safe, everything is OK,” a few times. It’s amazing how much you can calm yourself down!

Get the Facts

Sometimes all the news reports about a disaster can make it seem like things are worse than they really are. That’s why it’s important to filter the info you hear to make sure you know the facts of the situation.Whenever you hear something that scares, worries or confuses you on the news or read it in the paper, make sure to ask an adult like your teacher what’s true and what’s not. Also, while it is very important to stay aware of what’s happening around you, I also recommend taking some time off from reading/watching those bad news reports every day (or, take some “time on” to look for good news stories that can make you feel better and more hopeful). Once you’ve got the facts, there’s no need to keep listening or watching – it may only make you feel more worried, needlessly.

Be Ready

Another way to “get the facts” is to read up on earthquakes and tsunamis – the more you know about how these natural events work, the better you might feel about them. Also, learning what to do in case of another earthquake or tsunami can reassure you that you’ll be able to stay safe and protected no matter what may happen in the future. Finally, putting together an earthquake emergency kit and making a safety plan with your family to keep in your home can also provide some extra reassurance in case another tremor happens in the future.

Feel Grateful

Can anything good come out of a natural disaster? Yes – people who live through these events, like you, eventually feel a sense of gratitude for surviving. They often understand better than most of us that life is precious and that we should enjoy every moment of it the best we can! It make take some time for you to feel this way, but in the meantime, try looking on the bright side – you made it through this, and you still have the opportunity to live a wonderful, happy life!

Go On

When bad things happen, it can be easy to dwell on them. However, living a life full of fear and worry about what COULD happen instead of focusing on the good things that ARE happening is not the best idea. I understand that you are feeling shaken up about this, but at some point you need to tell yourself that it’s over and it’s time to move on…you don’t want to live in fear anymore, do you? Don’t let this take over your life when you have so much to live for and be grateful for!

Get Close

Something else that could help is reminding the people around you how much you love and care for them – and reminding yourself of that, too! Write you mom a note, give your dad a hug, tell your friends how much they mean to you – recognizing the good things in life is an important part of the healing process.

Pitch In

If there are any clubs or groups in your area that are pitching in to help out with relief after the earthquake/tsunami, why not see if you can join in their efforts and help out? Doing something positive to give back to your community could really go a long way in making you feel better – you’ll feel like you’re doing something to help the country of Japan – and yourself – move on and rebuild!

HAVE YOUR SAY: What do you think WorriedAsUsual19 should do? Do you have some good advice? Leave your comment below!

Related Stories
51 Comments

Related Stories

Micro_carp_micro
May 5 is Children's Day in Japan, when families celebrate the healthy growth and happiness of chi...
The American Red Cross is one of the biggest humanitarian organizations that have rushed to help ...
Micro_tsunami_micro
Tsunamis are giant, destructive waves that can wipe out a city in only minutes. Find out what cau...
F1155927837296

Disaster You'd Least Like to Get Caught In?

  • Hurricane.
  • Flash flood.
  • Avalanche.
  • Earthquake.

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

SmartSunnyShadow
I have one so annoying sister, that it feels like I have 200 of them, oh my god. She's pounding on the door right now, HELP! 
reply about 3 hours
SmartSunnyShadow
Dad, obviously. I can't even explain what he does to me!
reply about 3 hours
SmartSunnyShadow
Well, if they are your BFFs, they shouldn't be teasing you to make you feel bad. Me, and my BFFs tease each other all the time playfully, but I understand that this is different, and if it's making you feel bad it isn't playful at all.   Maybe your eldest friend is having some trouble with family issues, bad grades, body changes, etc. It's okay to be angry, so maybe you should leave her space for a few days, and see if it turns better. If it isn't, then try to first make her calm down. Then, make her talk to you about why she is so angry and ask if you can try to help. If nothing turns out better, tell her that you feel uncomfortable, and you want her to talk to you.  For your 3rd eldest friend, support her as much as possible, and stand up for her in this terrible situation. If you are all BFFs, then you should all be very close and comfortable around each other, and the fight shouldn't last long. If not, they are not your real friends, and you have to go on without them. I have tons of advice on how to make new friends, so just ask me if you want to know. Your 2nd eldest friend seems to be the main problem.  First of all, tell her to stop, and say how you don't like her bullying you. You must say what she is doing wrong, and how it makes you feel. If she doesn't care, tell her you're serious, and you hate what she is doing to you. If it continues, ignore what trash she is saying, and just simply walk away. Focus on other things that will help make you feel better. Remember, all she is is a person, and it's up to you to act appropriately.  Stay positive, and calm. Focus on other things, and if she continues, tell her that you can all be friends and you miss her. Go get another friend to stand up with you, and tell her that you will report to an adult if she won't stop. She may be your friend, but she deserves it. I told on my BFF when she was mean, so it's all okay now.  If all else fails, get a trusted adult, and hang out with nicer friends. Your other friends will learn from their mistakes. If not, warn them, and give them a sincere kindness note of how you miss being friends. Then, also give one to the bully.
reply about 3 hours
AnnaOfExquizurd
Yeah, @CyclonicBass the best option really is to find a girl with a quirky personality. Become friends with her. Possibly, over time, she'll grow close to you and accept a request to be with you. Hope it goes well!
reply 1 day
drowning
You go out and you find someone who you can be you with. It's not a hard question to find the answer too.
reply 1 day