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Dear Dish-It: I Want Highlights

Dear Dish-It,


I am a skater now but I still look preppy. My dad is OK with me getting highlights but my mom won't let me. How can I get her to let me get highlights and stuff so I don't look so preppy?


i_am_cute10


Dear iamc10,


Your question breaks down into two parts. The first part is about changing your look to fit in. The second part is about asking your mom to change her mind about something. Let’s deal with both parts of your question separately.


Is it OK to change your look to fit in? Well, yes and no. It’s definitely OK to change and evolve and grow physically, especially since you are constantly changing and growing and evolving on the inside as you get older and go through different phases of your life.


The thing that’s not OK is changing your appearance or anything else about you just to fit in or be cool. If your outside doesn’t match your inside, that’s a really tough thing to figure out. Before you do anything to change the way you look, make sure you are happy on the inside. That’s the part that really counts.


In terms of getting your mom to change her mind or see your point of view when it comes to getting highlights in your hair, the main thing you need to do is be mature about it. You need to show your mom that you know what you’re doing and you’re old enough to make certain decisions about yourself and your life. Here are some tips that can help you with the rest.


The first step to take is to stop for moment and think about what it is you want and why you want it so badly. Think of all the reasons you can as to why your mom should change her mind and let you get highlights. You need a few (that is, more than one) good reasons as to why your mom should say yes, and you need to be able to give her some things to think about while she makes her decision.


Before you go to talk to your mom and give her your reasons, you need to prep yourself to hear her say “NO.” The reason you need to really do this is you can’t get upset if that’s what her final answer is. If you blow up and lose your cool, there will be less of a chance you can talk to her again about it in the future.


When you’re ready, go to your mom and ask if you can talk to her. Give her all your reasons for getting your hair done and listen politely – without interrupting – when she asks you questions or gives you her opinion. Don’t argue or fight with her – it won’t get you anywhere.


If the answer is still no, stay calm and think about your next steps. Try helping out more around the house, or help your mom with some of her work to show her you are mature and responsible. You may even want to think about saving up your own money and offering to pay for your highlights yourself.


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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    Kirsteeeeen
    Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
    I hope you don't mind that I moved this to friends, but I thought it'd be more fitting since your question seems mainly friendship based. :) Do you mind being younger than your classmates? Do you feel it inhibits your school experience? I think you should do what feels best to you, whether that be staying behind because friendship has a big impact, or continuing ahead if you prioritize academic growth. Only you know what's right for you. :p If it's any help, I left high school early and went to college. I was already used to being the youngest in my class so it wasn't a huge jump socially, and I found a lot of friends of all ages. :D With that being said, I do still miss being with people my age but it's too late to go back and I wouldn't trade my experience for the world.
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    YassenGregorovich
    I'm 13 and will be going on to 9th grade. I skipped kindergarted  :p and 5th grade. So I'm a lot younger then most of my classmates will be. I'm thinking of repeating 8th grade so I will be more of the same age as the other people in my class. But I'm not sure if I should because I got a B+ or A- average in 8th grade. I need some advice on this. Sorry if this is the wrong section for this I just thought general was the right place. Thanks!  :D
    reply about 20 hours
    aftershock
    aftershock posted in Style:
    Thanks all of you guys for your responses. It seems many of you don't share pics to get help from friends when you're choosing. Thats OK. If anyone does want to go on the VIP list to be the first to try the new app then feel free to complete the info form here: http://goo.gl/forms/FOiKWa4DoAQHxtOx1 
    reply about 21 hours
    CoolerThanMyself
    I'm a 12 year old girl with really strict parents! I do chores( even handling BLEACH sometimes) , I take care of my little brother, I'm in top set for all my classes- even on the gifted and talented register and I've only ever had 1 detention- and that was their fault anyway bc I was late( they drive). But, I'm still NEVER allowed out with my friends! My friends are all in top sets as well, are well behaved and all we literally would do is window shopping. I mean, there are my age smoking shisha and doing #####- they should be lucky I'm not a delinquent! But my parents always say I can't hang out. Not because they're worried about my safety, they just dont want me to go out.! Even sleepovers, my parents always say no because they ' haven't met the parents" but they make NO effort to do so. I'm losing out on knowing my friends better and whilst they're all making best friends, at school I'm just the person in the background- the left out friend. It hurts and most of the time I wish I was fostered or something. How can I make them loosen up? ( don't say anything about sneaking out because I chose life)
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    Corps
    Corps posted in Style:
    Thank You Mate :)
    reply 2 days