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Dear Dish-It: Shaving My Legs

Shaving Your Legs

Dear Dish-It,

My mama won’t let me shave – she says I’m too young. What do I do?

lilfabulous

Dear LF,

Every girl, pretty much, has been there before! It can be really tough when your mom doesn’t seem to understand or agree with something that’s important to you. Here are some tips on how to talk to your mom about shaving your legs, what to say and what to do if she says no.

The Talk

If you’ve already asked and she’s said “no” don’t bring it up every 5 minutes – she’ll just get annoyed. Instead, sit her down for a full convo on the subject and don’t bring it up again for a few months – no matter what the outcome. Here are some ways to talk to her about it so that things come out in your favor!

  1. Listen to her: Tell your mom you want to start shaving and acknowledge that she doesn’t approve. Then ask her to explain why. Really pay attention – she might actually have some good reasons.
  2. Explain yourself: Politely tell her your reasons for wanting to shave. If other girls have made fun of you or if it’s making you feel so uncomfortable that you won’t even wear shorts in 90-degree weather, she might be more likely to understand.
  3. Compromise: No matter what mom’s reasons for saying “no” are, you have to let her know that you were listening and you’re willing to meet her halfway. Offer a compromise: you’ll only shave below your knees or you’ll use a hair removal cream instead of shaving.
  4. Give it time: After the two of you have chatted ask her to think it over before she makes a decision. Decide on a time when she’ll tell you and don’t ask her about it until then.

The Decision

Now comes the (hopefully) good part, when your mom tells you whether or not you’re allowed to shave. If your conversation went well, you both listened to each other and she understands that your reasons are good, she’ll most likely say yes. If she does, great! Make sure you include her in the process by asking for tips or a demo. If she says no, here’s how to handle it:

  1. Accept it: Tell her you understand her decision and while it isn’t what you wanted you’ll respect it. Even if you’re feeling totally bummed, you’re showing her how mature you are by not whining.
  2. Try again: After a month or two, approach the subject again. Make sure mom knows that it’s a big deal to you and why. It also might help to gently remind her how mature you were about the rejection last time. You may have to repeat this cycle a few times, but be patient! She will eventually say yes.

Remember: NO BEGGING OR WHINING! If you handle the situation like the mature girl you are, she’ll be more likely to treat you like one.

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Comments

hellokittyluvah
I too never shaved my legs. And I'm12. The trick for me is to stand a little farther aw...
commented: Tue Oct 08, 2013

sajadel

sajadel wrote:

Mmmmm... I don't shave my self I use secret things hahahah u don't even know it Lola ha...
commented: Tue Oct 01, 2013

_JeEpErS_cReEpErS
i shave everyday , :c
commented: Mon Sep 30, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

ILMDGRL
ILMDGRL posted in Friends:
I think the title is fairly self explanatory. I don't know how to explain self harm scars and cuts to my friends (don't even get me started on my father) without having them completely freak out on me or think I'm a total basket case. I can't hide most the scars and cuts given their placement. I'd also like to know how to explain it to a friend's parent bc I know that will be a problem too. - (Note: I'm not insane. Just have been a tough time lately and I snapped under too much pressure. I'm not a danger to myself anymore. End of story.) - I don't like to go into detail when discussing my self harm and why I did it, but I know my friends are very inquisitive like their parents. I just want to know how to ride out the conversation and would appreciate any help in the matter. Thanks!
reply about 1 hour
smurfetblue
smurfetblue posted in Friends:
i sorry to hear abou that, i get bullied also and i know how that feels when no one talk to you or helps you...hope things get better for you
reply about 8 hours
jordand08
jordand08 posted in Friends:
"AlphaT" wrote:I have thought a lot on suicide...and people in my family have attempted to do so....And I can say with all certainty, it is stupid. But you're not in your right mind when you make that decision, or even think about it seriously.Bullying can lead to suicide, but I urge everyone thinking about it to also think of the good in their life. Exactly, because, I promise, life gets better. Even when it seems like it's not, it does, in the darkest part of your life, you'll find the hope that you lost. 
reply about 8 hours
AlphaT
AlphaT posted in Friends:
I have thought a lot on suicide...and people in my family have attempted to do so.... And I can say with all certainty, it is stupid. But you're not in your right mind when you make that decision, or even think about it seriously. Bullying can lead to suicide, but I urge everyone thinking about it to also think of the good in their life.
reply about 8 hours
jordand08
jordand08 posted in Friends:
"hugebear" wrote:This is awesome advise Jordan :)I hates it when I see anyone getting bullied and will always stand beside them against bullies.Suicide is not the answer to problems even if the person feels like its the only way to stop it.I agrees with you.. TALK TO SOMEONE... it really helps to understand and get the emotions out and get help.[Jordan I hopes you doesnt mind but I moved to the Dear Dish It and done the sticky toffee :angel] It's okay Huge, I didn't know which one to put it on, because I knew you'd move it if I got it wrong, but thank you. (:
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