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Dear Dish-It, I'm Single and Like It


Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".


Dear Dish-It,

Ok, I am single now. And I sort of want to stay that way. Three boys have asked me out and I have said no to all of them and it has felt really good because I am the type that always has a boyfriend. Now, another boy asked me out and I broke up with this boy two months ago, we had a disagreement. He has just asked me back out... the problem is that I still like him and I want to be his girlfriend - but I like being single. I am having a party that I invited him to and I really want him to come because we have fun together. But he says he won't come as my friend, he only wants to come as my boyfriend. What should I do? I keep telling him give me time but he says he needs an answer. But I really need to think about it. Please help me!
BablyBlu2


Dear BablyBlu2,

If ya wanna be single right now - BE SINGLE! Don't go back out with him. Sure, the guy is fun and ya have a good time together - so keep him as a best bud. If you don't want a boyfriend, don't let him pressure you into having one. It won't work out in the end anyway - nothing forced ever does. So tell the fun boy to chill and remind him that if he stays your friend - without pressure - he'll have a better chance of bein' your one-and-only when you're ready! So stick your ground, be strong and hang in there girl!


Dear Dish-It,

There's this kid that likes me but I don't like him. The other day my friend told me that he hated himself because I don't like him. He's begging me to get with him and my friend tells me I should just to shut him up. What should I do?
Sweet_Angel635


Dear Sweet_Angel635,

You don't go out with someone just to shut them up. It's not fair to them and it's not cool. What you should do is be nice to him... nice, but firm. Explain he's a great guy but he's not your type - tell him you still wanna be friends. As for him hating himself just because you don't like him... he's definitely got self-esteem issues. If he starts getting really depressed you might wanna tell the 'rents or a teacher. Oh yeah, one last thing - it sounds like your "friend" is making the whole situation a bigger deal than it has to be. Tell her to take a break from feeding the rumor mill and stay out of it.


Dear Dish-It,

I've been friends with this guy for three years now. Everyone says he likes me... I want to find out for myself. So, how do I know when a guy likes me?
angel_links


Dear angel_links,

There are tons of ways to find out if a guys digs ya. If you're friends say he does, chances are he does. Then there is the body language... does he smile at you a lot? Stare at you a lot? Talk to you a lot? A "yes" answer to any of those is pretty much a good sign. But to find out for sure - you gotta ask him. You don't have to go right up to him and blurt out. "Hey! Do you like me?" That would be a little cheesy. But ask him to do something - just the two of you - you know, a date. Then, if you're a total chicken - you could always write him a note... but I'm not a fan of that method myself. Whatever you decide to do - and however it turns out - remember this: You never know unless you try. Good luck!


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


Related Stories:
  • Dear Dish-It: Dating - I Like Two Guys
  • Dear Dish-It: Depression - I Think I'm Ugly
  • Dear Dish-It: Dating - I Think She's The One
  • More Great Advice from Dish-It!
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    F1134251780000

    The Best Part of Being Single?

    • I get to flirt with anyone and not feel bad.
    • I don't have to feel sorry about what my BF or GF thinks.
    • More time to spend with friends.
    • There's nothing good about being single!

    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    Autonomy
    "Lulu335" wrote: I live in a military family, which means we have to move A LOT. I'm halfway through 6th grade, and I'm really stressed out. The reason is because I have a guy who really likes me, and we liked each other back in the 5th grade, and he's even got me presents and everything, but now I'm starting to doubt whether I still like him or not. And he is a great guy; he's silly, funny, kind- but I just don't know if he's the right guy for me. Plus there's a friend of mine who I know likes me as more than a friend, and he's a great guy, too. I really need advise!! Oh sweetheart, your situation is so, so very far from being complicated. In fact, it's actually, entirely simple. But I'm here to help you see that, because you can't see it yourself quite yet. Brace yourself, you may never hear such advice in your life ever again. Or you might, I can't predict the future. You're in sixth grade, you said. Assuming you live in the United states and weren't held back, you're probably 12, maybe 11. The problem is, the human brain isn't fully developed until a person hits the age of about 25. This means, without debate, that your brain unable to fully grasp what being in a relationship actually entails, what it means, what the consequences are, and so forth. You can't even fathom it, my dear. I couldn't at your age; no one can. You've just begun to hit puberty at this point in your very young, completely normal life. Certain hormones are now being developed by your body that, up until puberty began, your body did not produce. Let me explain, in simple terms, what this means: these new hormones are giving you fuzzy feelings for boys, but these feelings are not what people with fully developed brains call "love." Love means being self sacrificing, compromising, giving and taking, communicating clearly and honestly, and so much more. What you're feeling is a part of love-romance-but it's not all there is to love. It's actually just a few simple chemicals being released in your brain: dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and few others. Your brain releases those chemicals when, say, you see a boy you like, and those chemicals make you feel all fuzzy inside. In fact, (brace yourself,) there's nothing inherently special about the boys you like, or the boys that like you; in fact, they're also, entirely normal, and aside from a few minor differences in character, completely like most other boys their age. Had you been born in another town, gone to another school, you would have gotten the same fuzzy feeling about whatever boy you thought you liked at that school. You see? I'm not saying this to make you feel insignificant, but perhaps the insight will make moving easier for you. The next place your militant parents settle down in will also have a middle school, with a bunch of normal 11-14 year old boys and girls, all doing the exact same things the kids at your school do right now. Does that put things in perspective for you? The world is a very, very big place, and it's home to billions upon billions of people. Your situation is far from being a needle in a hay stack; it's more like a blade of grass, in a vast field of foliage. The feelings you're feeling aren't uncommon or complicated, they just feel that way to you. (Now, really brace yourself, because this is going to get uncomfortable.) We, as people, tend to think that we're special. Each one of us a unique snowflake, drifting about in big blue sky, that exists solely to show the world how special we are. The problem is, the other seven billions snowflakes (people) think exactly like we do, and in this way, we are all the same. We think our problems are new problems that no one has ever dealt with before, and no one else could possibly understand the pain and suffering we're going through. We all think this way, by nature; but it's simply naive. Heartache and suffering have existed since people existed, and possibly before then. Your situation may not be ideal to you, but once you come to terms with the fact that life isn't ideal for anyone, you might actually feel comfort. The easiest way to cope with our many problems, is to accept them for what they are: a part of the human experience. Natural, normal, repeating generation after generation without end. Again, these are concepts that require some deep thought, and you might not fully grasp them quite yet. But remember them. With time, as you grow, think about them more, and you will find peace with your life. And remember this: although you're stuck (for now) on a giant rock hurling around the sun at an incredible speed, you're not alone. With billions of other people stuck here with you, you'll never be without friends.
    reply about 8 hours
    Fun_125
    I personally think that when you ARE ready then go for it! As long as the person you like isn't a jerk to anyone or you go for it! Just don't get too serious. It's middle school. Good luck!
    reply about 10 hours
    Error44
    "Lulu335" wrote:I live in a military family, which means we have to move A LOT. I'm halfway through 6th grade, and I'm really stressed out. The reason is because I have a guy who really likes me, and we liked each other back in the 5th grade, and he's even got me presents and everything, but now I'm starting to doubt whether I still like him or not. And he is a great guy; he's silly, funny, kind- but I just don't know if he's the right guy for me. Plus there's a friend of mine who I know likes me as more than a friend, and he's a great guy, too. I really need advise!!I know, it is too late but I think you should not go for a deeper relationship, don't make it hard for yourself and try to be his just friend because you are so young .
    reply about 13 hours
    Error44
    "queenslay173" wrote:I was at school when I noticed people started to tell me this boy liked me and I thought it was cool because I'm used to that type of stuff then we started to dated in October we broke up right before christmas and it was so strange. we got back together in the beginning of January and we broke up again on the 4 my friends are really mad at me and he seemed really upset I like him but I just don't want to be with him anymore what should I do ?- confused lover Tell him your reasons and make it clear for both of you
    reply about 13 hours
    lottie_h141
    lottie_h141 posted in Style:
    thank u!!! acc helps so much. Obvs going to superstars aswell 
    reply 3 days