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Dear Dish-It, Being Fat Is Ruining My Life

Dish-It serves up some great advice about body weight and eating habits.
Advice About Your Body

Dear Dish-It


Dear Dish-It,

I feel like being fat is ruining my life... there are a lot of problems in my life and it's kind of like a circle. Here, I'll explain... I am fat because I am depressed. I'm depressed because I have problems. One of my problems is weight. I'm trying to starve myself but it's so hard, I get so weak and I already lost 43 pounds but it's still not enough. I'm huge and I can't stop eating once I start... what do I do? Like all the commercials say, I've tried everything! Please help me.
Flower


Dear Flower,

First off, you should NEVER try and starve yourself. No matter how unhappy you are with your body, starving it is only going to cause serious health problems and can actually cause you to gain weight cuz your body goes into starvation mode. Losing 43 pounds is not very healthy for most adults, let alone a teen or pre-teen girl. Here are some tips on how you can get fit the healthy way!

  • Get regular exercise, even if it's just a walk with some buds. Offer to take your dog for walks too.
  • Cut fatty foods and sugar out of your diet. Eat lots more fruits and veggies and drink as much water as you can.
  • Make a list of everything you eat each day. This way, you'll be able to see what it is you need to steer away from, and what sorts of healthy foods you could be replacing them with.

  • It does sound like you're in need of someone to talk to about these problems you are dealing with though. Your issues seem to run a lot deeper than just a struggle with body image. Definitely talk to a trusted adult. Your 'rents, a school counselor, someone! And you could take a look at this Web page - it has a ton of great self-esteem boosting tips, as well as links to help you find professionals to talk to about all the things you are going through. And although you may think this is total cheese, take a look at the Oprah site. She actually has a lot of great ideas on how to lead a happier and healthier life. Good Luck!


    Dear Dish-It,

    My friend Jasmine is best friends with this girl who went through my things and then told one of my other friends and now my other friend thinks I'm a liar. We haven't talked since we got out of school for summer break and that was June 18th - and my other friend Jasmine is not talkin' to me either. I think Jasmine's best friend has something to do with Jasmine not talking to me. I think this is because this girl keeps taking Jasmine places and every time I call her she's always busy with this other girl. I'm sick and tired of it! Jasmine's acting like she doesn't even like me anymore as a friend. I keep asking her, and she keeps saying yes, but for some reason I get the feeling that Jasmine's lying to me. Her BFF is gettin' on my nerves! I think that the BFF and Jasmine should apologize, but I don't know what to do. Tell her all of this, or break off the friendship. Please HELP ME!!!
    liltoni85


    Dear liltoni85,

    Whoa! I think you need to sit down, count to ten and just breathe for a second. From what I've gathered, your friend Jasmine is hanging with a girl you don't like... a girl that may or may not have caused trouble between the two of you. You've asked Jasmine if she still wants to be your friend and she says yes. But you want that to mean that she will spend more time with you and less time with the troublemaker, right? It doesn't sound like anyone owes you an apology. Did you ever stop to consider that maybe Jasmine really likes this other girl and they have a lot of fun together? You demanding an apology from them for excluding you will not score you any friendship points. If you aren't happy with how they are leaving you out, then move on and find some friends who you can have a good time with. If you just leave Jasmine to figure things out, and not confront her, then I am sure everything will work out. Just hang in there!


    Dear Dish-It,

    Hi! This is not about dating! I don't think dating is important. I am an orchestral band percussionist. I really need your advice. I march for the a marching band and I am a new member. I am going to be tested the first week of rehearsals. I don't know how to prepare! What should I do?
    Thanks! You rock!
    fhsbandmember


    Dear fhsbandmember,

    You must have heard that age-old saying, "Practice makes perfect," at least once in your life. Well, that saying will come in handy as the big marching band test approaches. I'm sure you didn't make it all the way to this gig with the marching band without practicing your percussion skills already. If the thought of banging away on your drums for hours all alone makes you cringe, then what about inviting some marching band compadres over for a jam session? If you take some deep breaths, and concentrate on what you're good at, then this test will be nothing more than another opportunity to show off your mad percussion skills!


    So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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  • More Great Advice from Dish-It!
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    Comments

    vinyl

    vinyl wrote:

    i dont like the second dear dish it advice
    commented: Sun Jul 13, 2014

    vinyl

    vinyl wrote:

    im fat and ugly! my face is all big and fat! and i just so ugly! eew!
    commented: Sun Jul 13, 2014

    JesseWesse

    JesseWesse wrote:

    Even*
    commented: Tue Apr 15, 2014

    there are 16 more comments

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    Boysrock50
    Boysrock50 posted in Friends:
    The perfect friend would always be there to support you when you have a problem, and will offer to help. The perfect friend is someone who guides you to doing the right things, not the wrong things. They would make the effort to talk to you, not wait for you to contact them first all the time, as friendship should be a 50-50 relationship. They would stay your friend for years, not leave you as soon as they find someone 'cooler'. They won't act different around others to impress them and leave you. They would listen to you just as much as they tell you things. They would turn to you as their first choice, not their reserve choice. But most importantly, the perfect friend would be someone who always makes you happy to be with.
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    brunostar
    brunostar posted in Friends:
    You want someone who cares, understands and will be there for you, and not just when you're down. You want someone who makes you smile and laugh at 3 am and you have to try not to giggle in class because of something that happened a weeks ago. Everyone fights, but you don't want someone who you constantly fight with and who makes you feel down or drops your self-esteem. If someone bothers you to do bad stuff, walk the other direction and don't take in the negative force. I'm the type of person that takes people in for who they are, I care and listen and try my best to make them laugh and be happy. I have gotten mixed with bad friends as in talking me into negative things, constantly making me feel down, ditching for other people, insulting other friends. I need to change how I act, I seem to annoy and bother people a lot. And possibly I care too much, I also at times understand too little. I get attached to easily and hurt easily. I don't know what else you asked so imma end this now xD
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    MissD
    MissD posted in Friends:
    Describe the perfect friend in your opinion.  In what ways are you a good friend? What do you need to do to become a better friend?  What do you think? 
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    MissD
    MissD posted in Friends:
    Honestly? They aren't safe for you. Depression is difficult to overcome. Especially when people are negative about it around you. If they refuse to believe you, then there is no point trying to be friends with them again. Some people just don't accept mental problems or swear that they are being faked. I never quite understood why people don't acknowledge it, but whatever. Moving on from that, you should find friends that you don't need to pretend around - depression isn't too uncommon. Look and listen. You'll find the right people - they just proved that they weren't it. No one can go back and make a brand-new start, but anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending!  I really like the post above me, Huntress that was really good advice. I have a theory, there are two kinds of people in the world, Vampires and Sunshine. The vampires, take from us: they suck our self esteem, positive thoughts, smiles, energy.. YUCK. Sunshine on the other hand, gives and gives. You feel warmer just being around sunshine people, they lift you up, remind you about your good qualities, cheer for you and help you be your best most true self.  Here is the other thing about Vampires and Sunshine - Vampires tend to run in packs, they draw their power from taking other peoples away - and IMO they are insatiable. Sunshine people are awesome, even if you only have one in your life - it's enough.  I hope you will look around and see if you can spot the difference, I'd love to know if you have at least one Sunshine person in your life - let go of those horrible vampires, in the end you will feel much better for having made that empowered decision!!  Good Luck! 
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    Huntress
    Huntress posted in Friends:
    Honestly? They aren't safe for you. Depression is difficult to overcome. Especially when people are negative about it around you. If they refuse to believe you, then there is no point trying to be friends with them again. Some people just don't accept mental problems or swear that they are being faked. I never quite understood why people don't acknowledge it, but whatever. Moving on from that, you should find friends that you don't need to pretend around - depression isn't too uncommon. Look and listen. You'll find the right people - they just proved that they weren't it.
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