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Dear Dish-It, Being Fat Is Ruining My Life


Dear Dish-It


Dear Dish-It,

I feel like being fat is ruining my life... there are a lot of problems in my life and it's kind of like a circle. Here, I'll explain... I am fat because I am depressed. I'm depressed because I have problems. One of my problems is weight. I'm trying to starve myself but it's so hard, I get so weak and I already lost 43 pounds but it's still not enough. I'm huge and I can't stop eating once I start... what do I do? Like all the commercials say, I've tried everything! Please help me.
Flower


Dear Flower,

First off, you should NEVER try and starve yourself. No matter how unhappy you are with your body, starving it is only going to cause serious health problems and can actually cause you to gain weight cuz your body goes into starvation mode. Losing 43 pounds is not very healthy for most adults, let alone a teen or pre-teen girl. Here are some tips on how you can get fit the healthy way!

  • Get regular exercise, even if it's just a walk with some buds. Offer to take your dog for walks too.
  • Cut fatty foods and sugar out of your diet. Eat lots more fruits and veggies and drink as much water as you can.
  • Make a list of everything you eat each day. This way, you'll be able to see what it is you need to steer away from, and what sorts of healthy foods you could be replacing them with.

  • It does sound like you're in need of someone to talk to about these problems you are dealing with though. Your issues seem to run a lot deeper than just a struggle with body image. Definitely talk to a trusted adult. Your 'rents, a school counselor, someone! And you could take a look at this Web page - it has a ton of great self-esteem boosting tips, as well as links to help you find professionals to talk to about all the things you are going through. And although you may think this is total cheese, take a look at the Oprah site. She actually has a lot of great ideas on how to lead a happier and healthier life. Good Luck!


    Dear Dish-It,

    My friend Jasmine is best friends with this girl who went through my things and then told one of my other friends and now my other friend thinks I'm a liar. We haven't talked since we got out of school for summer break and that was June 18th - and my other friend Jasmine is not talkin' to me either. I think Jasmine's best friend has something to do with Jasmine not talking to me. I think this is because this girl keeps taking Jasmine places and every time I call her she's always busy with this other girl. I'm sick and tired of it! Jasmine's acting like she doesn't even like me anymore as a friend. I keep asking her, and she keeps saying yes, but for some reason I get the feeling that Jasmine's lying to me. Her BFF is gettin' on my nerves! I think that the BFF and Jasmine should apologize, but I don't know what to do. Tell her all of this, or break off the friendship. Please HELP ME!!!
    liltoni85


    Dear liltoni85,

    Whoa! I think you need to sit down, count to ten and just breathe for a second. From what I've gathered, your friend Jasmine is hanging with a girl you don't like... a girl that may or may not have caused trouble between the two of you. You've asked Jasmine if she still wants to be your friend and she says yes. But you want that to mean that she will spend more time with you and less time with the troublemaker, right? It doesn't sound like anyone owes you an apology. Did you ever stop to consider that maybe Jasmine really likes this other girl and they have a lot of fun together? You demanding an apology from them for excluding you will not score you any friendship points. If you aren't happy with how they are leaving you out, then move on and find some friends who you can have a good time with. If you just leave Jasmine to figure things out, and not confront her, then I am sure everything will work out. Just hang in there!


    Dear Dish-It,

    Hi! This is not about dating! I don't think dating is important. I am an orchestral band percussionist. I really need your advice. I march for the a marching band and I am a new member. I am going to be tested the first week of rehearsals. I don't know how to prepare! What should I do?
    Thanks! You rock!
    fhsbandmember


    Dear fhsbandmember,

    You must have heard that age-old saying, "Practice makes perfect," at least once in your life. Well, that saying will come in handy as the big marching band test approaches. I'm sure you didn't make it all the way to this gig with the marching band without practicing your percussion skills already. If the thought of banging away on your drums for hours all alone makes you cringe, then what about inviting some marching band compadres over for a jam session? If you take some deep breaths, and concentrate on what you're good at, then this test will be nothing more than another opportunity to show off your mad percussion skills!


    So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    astucieuse331
    astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
    I've always felt the same way. My one best friend gossiped behind my back, used me, all that girl stuff. She took me for advantage and we had a bunch of fights because of her finding a new friend and completely acting as if I didn't exist, and I told her to give me at least some attention every once in a while if she can't even continue to talk to me daily. And.. I lost her. Well, she lost me. We both lost each other. But then I realized.. it's the people that you least expect to be nice to you you'll find kindness in. Why? Based on personal experience, and I'll tell you the story: For my gym class, me and my peers were supposed to make a group for a dance. This was when my best friend had found a new friend already, and the time at which we had a few fights because of that. Of course, I relied on my best friend to count me in her dance group. At lunchtime, I sat together with my best friend, and we ate our lunches in silence. All of a sudden, I brought up the dance groups and asked her straightforwardly: "Can I join your group?" No reply. "Kelly, can I join your group?" No reply. "I mean, since our class is uneven, I found it fair that there'd be a group of five, you know?" None at all. Kelly ignored me straight off the bat, leaving me speechless. My mind raced with thoughts, and I thought, maybe it's not worth having Kelly as a friend. A few days later, we were playing Dodgeball for gym. I was on Kelly's team, and overheard her talking with her new friends about who to pick for the dance group. One of her friends mentioned me, and Kelly said: "Oh no, we shouldn't pick her because _____ (I don't know what she said then)." I was shocked, but was anticipating it, so when the time came to choose groups, I saw my friend, Luke, ask two girls, Cher and Bridgette, to join their group. Surprisingly, Cher and Bridgette actually accepted him, and so I thought, "Wow, if they accepted Luke, they might accept me aswell!" and so built up the courage to ask them if I could join. Even though Cher and Bridgette were mean to me sometimes, I knew that I had to risk it and see what'd happen. Afterall, rejection is just another opportunity to find a better group. Little did I know, it'd be the best choice of my life. They were so happy, and even thanked me for joining them! I was speechless once more; I never knew that the peers that I thought I would never be friends with would actually be my friends!  So yeah, that's what I learnt, and I never regretted learning that fact. Ever since then, though, I've learnt not to trust people as much as I used to anymore. I learnt that independency is what works for me, what I was meant for in terms of socializing or working. But, other things may work for you. If you still want a friend, you can be independent and wait for the right person. However, if you still want a real friend, you can wait, but still mingle (hang out) with other people! I I'm not going to make fun of you because I know how you've felt, just as I stated in my past problem before. But you can move on from those friends, they're not worth your time and certainly don't deserve you as a friend. Trust me, if it's meant to be, you'll definitely find a true friend. But if it's not, you may become like me, finding happiness in my own way. I want to remind you though-- you don't need someone to stay happy, or keep you company. This may sound silly, but you can even have your own invisible friends! I've had one, but that's very rarely for me. It's not silly though if you see the general idea; usually these friends are made from different dimensions of your personality or just because of will. There's a lot more fish in the sea, though, so I'm sure you'll find a true friend that's meant for you  :) Take care, and I hope you'll find a true friend soon!
    reply about 18 hours
    ts01
    ts01 posted in Friends:
    im so sorry you girls feel that way.true friends are there, its just easier to find users because they are more plentiful. dont give up, you will find real friends eventually
    reply about 18 hours
    lolflowergirl
    lolflowergirl posted in Friends:
    i feel alone too
    reply about 20 hours
    kayme123
    kayme123 posted in Friends:
    i know the feeling. but i got taken off a website instead of my friends. i can assure you they probably feel the same and are missing you, BUT its not worth dwelling over it. friends come and go without any choice in life and trust me, i lost the love of my life and my two of the best friends in the world. The thing is, you have to move on, because they wouldent want you feeling sad over them right? they'd want you to be the happy person you were when you were with them! for starters, i'll be your friend so your not scared to make some new ones. To be honest, i went through the exact same thing as you did and it DOES hurt very bad. But once you find some people that are willing to make you feel better, you know you've chosen the right friends again
    reply 1 day
    Irene_love
    Irene_love posted in Style:
    "1.am.3m0" wrote:Hey. Im also turning 15 soon. So dont worry you arent alone hahah. Start dressing for your shape and also find whats comfortable.  Because if you wear something that is uncomfortable you wont be happy and happiness is the best look :) Most of the time I wear jeans with a graphic tshirt or singlet and a cardigan or light jacket. Hoodies are great for winter. And I wear combat boots like doc martins and converse. Hope I helped somehow! :)
    reply 1 day

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