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Dear Dish-It: Do I Tell My Friends About My Disorder?

Dear Dish-It,

I have a syndrome called blind rage syndrome. I found out two years ago when I first started feeling the effects and I'm afraid of what my friends will think of me if they find out.

James


Dear James,


The first thing you need to know and remember is that nobody's perfect, not even your friends. Chances are they've got things about them that they don't want you or anyone else to know, or that they're afraid of revealing because they're not sure how other people will react. You're not alone.


If you choose to talk to your friends about your syndrome (and that's something that's 100% up to you), know that it's probably not going to be a very easy discussion. The first thing you need to do is assess your friendship with each person when you're deciding whether you want to tell them or not. How much do you trust the person? Can you trust the person with your emotions? Will this person spread your feelings around the school?


If you feel you can trust the person, your next step is to assess how much the person actually knows about your specific disorder or dealing with a disorder of some kind in general. You are best to assume they know nothing at all on this topic and you should tell them in simple terms.


What To Do: Tell them you suffer from a lifelong disease that affects your moods. Tell them what it's like to live with your syndrome. After you describe what it is like having this disorder, make it clear to them that people with your disorder can and do live successful lives. It is important they understand that you are still a normal kid. You just have this disease that affects your brain. Stress that most of the time you will behave like every other normal kid and blend in, but you will also have the mood episodes that come with having blind rage syndrome.


Having friends who understand your disorder can be a great support system. They can be a terrific sounding board if they are capable of understanding what you go through and if you can trust them. Often, your friends can provide a level of support and point of view your parents, doctors and therapists are not able to provide.


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  • 25 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    EndlessDream
    EndlessDream posted in Style:
    You need breakfast and lunch. Starving yourself, even if you aren't hungry, makes you loose energy to the point you could pass out from not eating. Keep your diet healthy. For breakfast, at least have yogurt, fruit, and juice. Drink at least 4 full glasses of water a day. Trim down on the snacks. Everyone has different bodies and build. You may just be large-boned. And that's not bad! That makes you stronger and higher ability to gain muscle. Loosing weight doesn't happen over night. It can take months. 
    reply about 15 hours
    Nekogirl101
    Nekogirl101 posted in Style:
    For years my parents would tell me I'm skinny but compared to other people, my waist was bigger and I would always hide it. Though it was obvious I weighed more, I've only been doing this for a week and I didn't ever tell anyone what I was doing until my parents found out. I would skip lunch and breakfast and say I was full. I only ate a big dinner every night. Once my parents found out, they said it was unhealthy and if I didn't  stop, I would develop an eating disorder. I obviously listened to them, but I've tried as best as I can so far. I have barely lost any weight from exercise and my parents won't let me go on a diet because I already 'eat healthy enough'. I want to lose weight without exercising being 3/4s of my lifestyle. I know, I'm a lazy idiot for saying all this.
    reply about 16 hours
    rainbowpoptart
    Yes, purely for the fact that you should not "hate" your sister (or anyone, for that matter).  I'm guessing by "get in trouble for her", you mean she does something wrong and the blame is all put on you? Yeah, little siblings tend to do that a lot. My brother did for the longest time, until my parents found out how much a liar he is. She, hopefully, will grow out of this eventually. Either that, or your parent[s]/guardian[s] will eventually see through her. You lose your friends to her? By this do you mean your friends want to hang out with her and they want you to tag along and you don't? Or do you mean your friends chose your sister over you? If it's the latter, then perhaps you shouldn't have ever referred to those people as friends. You'll find friends who'll prefer you over your sister, I'm sure of it. The only thing I can tell you to do is try to get along with your sister. Every group of siblings has their cats and dogs moment in life, but they grow out of it (most of the time; there are, of course, circumstances where it doesn't work out that way). Please be grateful for your sister, even if you two fight a lot. You never know how much you need something until it's gone.
    reply 1 day
    liddielover
    i hate my little sister because i get introuble for her and lose my friends to her.is that wrong?
    reply 1 day
    skylar245
    skylar245 posted in Friends:
    "rainbowpoptart" wrote: "skylar245" wrote: Teacher said to wait for the Bus Driver and the counselor, she just talks to me and doesn't tell The Princible Then maybe try telling the principal yourself, and you should also report that the driver, teacher, and counselor haven't done anything to help you. If that fails, tell another trusted adult, like your mother. I'm sure someone you're close to would do their best to get justice. This is a major problem and it's a shame no one's done anything to help. ​No one listens to me anyway but my friends
    reply 3 days