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Dear Dish-it: Breaking Up - Without Breaking His Heart

Dear Dish-it,


How do I break up with someone but not hurt them? The person I'm with is madly in love with me but I don't think that this online dating thing is working out. I think I may need to end it. What should I do?


Dazed And Confused


Dear D&C,


Breaking up is never easy and it should always be done nicely. Even if the relationship is ending, it’s important to remember that the other person has feelings, and may be hurt when you break up with them. Here’s how to break up nicely.


Make sure you know what to say. Once you’ve decided that you’re ready for the relationship to end, think out what you will say. Avoid any clichés like “it’s not you, it’s me.” Be upfront about why the relationship is ending. Be honest and truthful, but avoid being too blunt and saying unnecessarily mean things just to cause pain. Break up nicely by carefully phrasing what you want to say.


Don’t put it off. Many people put off a breakup because it can be extremely uncomfortable for both people involved. Don’t act like a jerk hoping that they will break up with you first, and don’t avoid them or pretend that nothing is wrong. Do not tell your friends that you’re breaking up before you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend. There is no “right” time to break up, so stop putting it off until you find that right time.


Be understanding of their reaction. They may be angry, insulted, or sad. Understand that this is a normal part of the breakup process. Do not be angry or defensive, and do not try to comfort them as if you were still their boyfriend or girlfriend. This can only create drama. Be firm but gentle about your choice.


Give them space. Cutting ties is difficult, even if you’re the one to do the breaking up. Even though you may still feel attached for them and feel bad, especially if they cry, that is what their friends are for.


Sound Off

How would you break up with someone NICELY? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Gamer_GTA
Gamer_GTA posted in Friends:
throughout school I have always been picked on weither it be because of my interests or just my personality. In middle school I was called ####### everyday by all the guys in my grade. One of my teachers even bullied me and my mom never believed me because my teacher was so nice to her... I ended up crying on the 3rd day of my freshman year because the kids in my class were so mean to me... I'm gonna be a sophomore in highschool this year and I really don't want to go back to school because I'm afraid that it will be a repeat of freshman year... I need advice on how to make the best of the rest of school if I have to deal with the people that bully me...
reply about 2 hours
PinkaLicous123
PinkaLicous123 posted in Friends:
Like my sisters says Give him a hard time and if he cant handle it then he's NOT worth it..... your welcome.
reply about 3 hours
hugebear
hugebear posted in Friends:
Shares their chips with you :)
reply about 6 hours
Harmonia
Harmonia posted in Family Issues:
My mom. She utterly hates me and whenever we fight she not only takes all my things away in a rage so I can't talk to anyone online, she screams about how I'm stupid, lazy and a horrible person and other similar bad stuff. Thanks for the self esteem boost Mom (:
reply about 9 hours
Nate-Forever-Always
My mom can be really scary and persuasive when she wants something done and if we don't do it, you better WATCH OUT!!!
reply about 9 hours

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