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Dear Dish-it: Breaking Up - Without Breaking His Heart

Dear Dish-it,


How do I break up with someone but not hurt them? The person I'm with is madly in love with me but I don't think that this online dating thing is working out. I think I may need to end it. What should I do?


Dazed And Confused


Dear D&C,


Breaking up is never easy and it should always be done nicely. Even if the relationship is ending, it’s important to remember that the other person has feelings, and may be hurt when you break up with them. Here’s how to break up nicely.


Make sure you know what to say. Once you’ve decided that you’re ready for the relationship to end, think out what you will say. Avoid any clichés like “it’s not you, it’s me.” Be upfront about why the relationship is ending. Be honest and truthful, but avoid being too blunt and saying unnecessarily mean things just to cause pain. Break up nicely by carefully phrasing what you want to say.


Don’t put it off. Many people put off a breakup because it can be extremely uncomfortable for both people involved. Don’t act like a jerk hoping that they will break up with you first, and don’t avoid them or pretend that nothing is wrong. Do not tell your friends that you’re breaking up before you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend. There is no “right” time to break up, so stop putting it off until you find that right time.


Be understanding of their reaction. They may be angry, insulted, or sad. Understand that this is a normal part of the breakup process. Do not be angry or defensive, and do not try to comfort them as if you were still their boyfriend or girlfriend. This can only create drama. Be firm but gentle about your choice.


Give them space. Cutting ties is difficult, even if you’re the one to do the breaking up. Even though you may still feel attached for them and feel bad, especially if they cry, that is what their friends are for.


Sound Off

How would you break up with someone NICELY? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Comments

Abinabee

Abinabee wrote:

I agree with AngelThumbelina, if u don't start one u dont have 2 end it.If I was u I wu...
commented: Sat Feb 22, 2014

XxCryXx

XxCryXx wrote:

Im not trusting love again if I break up with my bf
commented: Mon Feb 10, 2014

21inkiepielover
I want to break up with Travis..,only if Kano was real..Dx
commented: Sun Dec 01, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Miley143
Miley143 posted in Style:
I really cant figure out what to wear tomorrow... ideas anyone
reply 1 day
jordand08
jordand08 posted in Friends:
"CuteSiren102" wrote:Dear Dish-it I am in my teens and in middle school. Well heres the thing, there is rumors going around saying i killed my sister. I didn't though she just has the flu. All of my friends say that they can'y hang around me anymore. Plus when i enter the halls everyone gets afraid and runs away from me. But to make matters worse I am being bullied really bad! My mom knows about it but she told me it will be over when my sister comes back to school! What do I do?!?! =( :confused Talk to a teacher, who, will stop the bullying at school. People make stuff up about other people just to do it, don't react to the bullying or what anyone has to say, and they'll give up on you after awhile. I hope everything gets better.
reply 1 day
CuteSiren102
CuteSiren102 posted in Style:
I am wearing a blue and gray shirt with blue jeans and different colered socks
reply 1 day
hugebear
hugebear posted in Friends:
Dear Dish-it I am in my teens and in middle school. Well heres the thing, there is rumors going around saying i killed my sister. I didn't though she just has the flu. All of my friends say that they can'y hang around me anymore. Plus when i enter the halls everyone gets afraid and runs away from me. But to make matters worse I am being bullied really bad! My mom knows about it but she told me it will be over when my sister comes back to school! What do I do?!?! =( :confused Ello and Im sorry your going through this.  You didnt kill your sister and it will be proven when she goes back to school. Whoevers saying this is talkings out of their belly button. If it was me I would laughs and say suree and then proves them wrong Dont let their pranks get to you and they know its not true either. Good luck :love
reply 1 day
CuteSiren102
CuteSiren102 posted in Friends:
Dear Dish-it I am in my teens and in middle school. Well heres the thing, there is rumors going around saying i killed my sister. I didn't though she just has the flu. All of my friends say that they can'y hang around me anymore. Plus when i enter the halls everyone gets afraid and runs away from me. But to make matters worse I am being bullied really bad! My mom knows about it but she told me it will be over when my sister comes back to school! What do I do?!?! =( :confused
reply 1 day

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