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Dear Dish-it: Breaking Up - Without Breaking His Heart

Dear Dish-it,


How do I break up with someone but not hurt them? The person I'm with is madly in love with me but I don't think that this online dating thing is working out. I think I may need to end it. What should I do?


Dazed And Confused


Dear D&C,


Breaking up is never easy and it should always be done nicely. Even if the relationship is ending, it’s important to remember that the other person has feelings, and may be hurt when you break up with them. Here’s how to break up nicely.


Make sure you know what to say. Once you’ve decided that you’re ready for the relationship to end, think out what you will say. Avoid any clichés like “it’s not you, it’s me.” Be upfront about why the relationship is ending. Be honest and truthful, but avoid being too blunt and saying unnecessarily mean things just to cause pain. Break up nicely by carefully phrasing what you want to say.


Don’t put it off. Many people put off a breakup because it can be extremely uncomfortable for both people involved. Don’t act like a jerk hoping that they will break up with you first, and don’t avoid them or pretend that nothing is wrong. Do not tell your friends that you’re breaking up before you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend. There is no “right” time to break up, so stop putting it off until you find that right time.


Be understanding of their reaction. They may be angry, insulted, or sad. Understand that this is a normal part of the breakup process. Do not be angry or defensive, and do not try to comfort them as if you were still their boyfriend or girlfriend. This can only create drama. Be firm but gentle about your choice.


Give them space. Cutting ties is difficult, even if you’re the one to do the breaking up. Even though you may still feel attached for them and feel bad, especially if they cry, that is what their friends are for.


Sound Off

How would you break up with someone NICELY? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Dear Dish-It in the forums

CloudNineGirl
CloudNineGirl posted in Friends:
Aw, so cute! :)
reply about 4 hours
usagimodoki
usagimodoki posted in Friends:
Forever alone ;_;*Sneef Sneef*
reply about 11 hours
Fox7Fabsome
Fox7Fabsome posted in Friends:
"Tldc_Julisha" wrote:I just don't think I should be alive anymore and people bully me and cyber bully me for so long that I think its time to give up is what my friend texted me No you have so much to live for. I never meet you but still
reply 1 day
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
Go with whatever you feel most comfortable with, and is best suited for the event. 
reply 1 day
Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Friends:
If you're having issues on KW then you can always report, ignore/delete, and block the person! Also let the moderators/admin know you're having issues! Same goes with most other places online.  It's also a good idea to tell an adult; you don't deserve to go through this! Whether it be a parent, a friends parent, teacher, principal, counsellor, family member, police officer, any trusted adult!  Unfortunately we here cannot stop what is going on for you, but we can remind you that you can get through this and things will get better. Keep your head up, and stand up for yourself. Take care. :)
reply 1 day

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