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Dear Dish-it: Breaking Up - Without Breaking His Heart

Dear Dish-it,


How do I break up with someone but not hurt them? The person I'm with is madly in love with me but I don't think that this online dating thing is working out. I think I may need to end it. What should I do?


Dazed And Confused


Dear D&C,


Breaking up is never easy and it should always be done nicely. Even if the relationship is ending, it’s important to remember that the other person has feelings, and may be hurt when you break up with them. Here’s how to break up nicely.


Make sure you know what to say. Once you’ve decided that you’re ready for the relationship to end, think out what you will say. Avoid any clichés like “it’s not you, it’s me.” Be upfront about why the relationship is ending. Be honest and truthful, but avoid being too blunt and saying unnecessarily mean things just to cause pain. Break up nicely by carefully phrasing what you want to say.


Don’t put it off. Many people put off a breakup because it can be extremely uncomfortable for both people involved. Don’t act like a jerk hoping that they will break up with you first, and don’t avoid them or pretend that nothing is wrong. Do not tell your friends that you’re breaking up before you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend. There is no “right” time to break up, so stop putting it off until you find that right time.


Be understanding of their reaction. They may be angry, insulted, or sad. Understand that this is a normal part of the breakup process. Do not be angry or defensive, and do not try to comfort them as if you were still their boyfriend or girlfriend. This can only create drama. Be firm but gentle about your choice.


Give them space. Cutting ties is difficult, even if you’re the one to do the breaking up. Even though you may still feel attached for them and feel bad, especially if they cry, that is what their friends are for.


Sound Off

How would you break up with someone NICELY? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Dear Dish-It in the forums

BlackWolfSoul
BlackWolfSoul posted in Friends:
so anyone want to bring anything up problem's or anything
reply about 1 hour
wolfiegal
wolfiegal posted in Friends:
"royal111" wrote:Dear Dish-It,         I met this really cool guy online and he happens to be my neighbor and I always talk to him online and he's like...flirting with me but then when I see him in person he is shy and sorta is teasing me. I have no idea if he likes me or he doesn't. Awe. I think that he's probably being shy because he's nervous. For the teasing? Probably friendly. If you're too nervous to talk to him in real life, talk to him online about it. Make it or break it sister! Good luck. (:
reply about 1 hour
starlya
starlya posted in Style:
im different than my friends;  I wear skirts and lace with stripes!  my friends seem to not like it or wanna go shopping with me anymore?   I can make new friends when I go to my new school; it's just friends or my dolly style please help! 
reply about 1 hour
royal111
royal111 posted in Friends:
Dear Dish-It,                I have to admit. There's is a guy that I'm totally drooling over & he asked me out!. But he's also my best-guy-friend. And im afraid that he's joking and if i say yes he's going to be totally disgusted with me and it will break up r friendship! Help!!!!  :(
reply about 2 hours
royal111
royal111 posted in Friends:
Dear Dish-It,          I met this really cool guy online and he happens to be my neighbor and I always talk to him online and he's like...flirting with me but then when I see him in person he is shy and sorta is teasing me. I have no idea if he likes me or he doesn't.
reply about 2 hours

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