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Dear Dish-it: Breaking Up - Without Breaking His Heart

Dear Dish-it,


How do I break up with someone but not hurt them? The person I'm with is madly in love with me but I don't think that this online dating thing is working out. I think I may need to end it. What should I do?


Dazed And Confused


Dear D&C,


Breaking up is never easy and it should always be done nicely. Even if the relationship is ending, it’s important to remember that the other person has feelings, and may be hurt when you break up with them. Here’s how to break up nicely.


Make sure you know what to say. Once you’ve decided that you’re ready for the relationship to end, think out what you will say. Avoid any clichés like “it’s not you, it’s me.” Be upfront about why the relationship is ending. Be honest and truthful, but avoid being too blunt and saying unnecessarily mean things just to cause pain. Break up nicely by carefully phrasing what you want to say.


Don’t put it off. Many people put off a breakup because it can be extremely uncomfortable for both people involved. Don’t act like a jerk hoping that they will break up with you first, and don’t avoid them or pretend that nothing is wrong. Do not tell your friends that you’re breaking up before you tell your boyfriend or girlfriend. There is no “right” time to break up, so stop putting it off until you find that right time.


Be understanding of their reaction. They may be angry, insulted, or sad. Understand that this is a normal part of the breakup process. Do not be angry or defensive, and do not try to comfort them as if you were still their boyfriend or girlfriend. This can only create drama. Be firm but gentle about your choice.


Give them space. Cutting ties is difficult, even if you’re the one to do the breaking up. Even though you may still feel attached for them and feel bad, especially if they cry, that is what their friends are for.


Sound Off

How would you break up with someone NICELY? Have your say by leaving a comment below this story!


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Comments

Abinabee

Abinabee wrote:

I agree with AngelThumbelina, if u don't start one u dont have 2 end it.If I was u I wu...
commented: Sat Feb 22, 2014

XxCryXx

XxCryXx wrote:

Im not trusting love again if I break up with my bf
commented: Mon Feb 10, 2014

21inkiepielover
I want to break up with Travis..,only if Kano was real..Dx
commented: Sun Dec 01, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

Kirsteeeeen
Kirsteeeeen posted in Style:
As the previous person said, look online. There are very cute clothes available in bigger sizes! Also when you go shopping take a look in popular stores as well as less popular that might look as if they're for older people. Often they follow very similar trends but have bigger sizes!
reply about 4 hours
Kirsteeeeen
I think you should go. It might be difficult but you never know. You might find something to talk about with his fiance and find a way to talk to her! Or you could be more social with other family. The only way to beat being unsocial in big groups is to put yourself into the situation and learn. You could actually have a great time :) Just relax, be yourself. Ask questions. People love to talk about themselves so ask lots. It'll keep conversation going and you'll learn about possible later conversation topics. Also smile and be friendly. Make small talk. Remember you're there to celebrate a happy time in someone's life. You might not like it but it's their big day, one of the biggest in their life. And your dad and sister are going so you could always stick around them if socializing doesn't work.
reply about 4 hours
hieverybody22
hieverybody22 posted in Style:
thxxxx
reply about 7 hours
thebellsofnotredame3
You can probably search for cute plus size clothes on the internet to find places that sell clothes that fit. As for style just wear what you feel comfy in.
reply about 11 hours
hieverybody22
hieverybody22 posted in Style:
help!! all my friennds are tiny and the only clothes that I feel comfy in is my mums... please help me alittleBIGproblem
reply about 11 hours

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