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Dear Dish-It: Vacation Love

Dear Dish-it,

I was just on vacation in Mexico. There was this guy…we never talked but we saw each other all over the resort and always caught each other’s eyes. But he’s a complete stranger…that I’m desperately in love with. All I know is his first name and that he’s from Canada. I’m in America. I found myself crying over him and trying to find him on Facebook, but with only a first name and Canada it didn’t work. Help me, please.

desperately in love

Dear desperately in love,

I’m afraid there’s not much that you can (or should) do about this situation…however, like most experiences in life, there is a chance here for you to learn something and grow so that the next time you feel like you really want to meet someone (and trust me, it WILL happen again!), you won’t miss your opportunity.

Bye-Bye Shy

While being too forward and upfront can cause problems, being too shy to say anything at all can leave you feeling like you currently do – disappointed and not in control. I wish I had a time machine that could take you back to the past so that you could say something to this guy, but I don’t. The best advice I can offer is that you look at this as a learning opportunity. The next time you feel like you have a connection with someone, don’t be afraid to say something!

Now, that may seem like something that you could never do in a million years – but you can! While you’re waiting for your next crush to come along, why not practice stepping out of your comfort zone and talking to people you would normally be too shy to talk to? If you’re not the type to raise your hand in class, start pushing yourself to do exactly that. You can even try joining a club or after-school group so that you’re forced to meet and talk to new people. All of this practice will make sure you’re ready to reach out to the next guy you like!

Finally, “reaching out” doesn’t mean writing a long love letter that could end up making you seriously blush. Rather, it means not being afraid to be yourself and to be friendly. Once you make the effort to say something as simple as “hi” to a guy that peaks your interest, you’ll be able to take the conversation further – and maybe even start flirting a little!

You Never Know

While I don’t recommend trying to search out and contact strangers online (seriously, don’t do it), you never know when someone you think you’ll never see again may pop back into your life. It may take years, but who knows? Maybe you’ll see your vacation crush again some day (remember the movie Grease? It happened to Sandy and Danny; it could happen to you!). In the meantime, I really wouldn’t worry about having lost the “love of your life” or anything like that. It’s totally normal to have crushes like this and trust me, you’ll see someone else soon that will likely make you forget all about your Mexican man…

HAVE YOUR SAY: What do you think desperately in love should do? Do you have some good advice? Leave your comment below!

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Vacay

It's time for a vacation! What's your dream getaway?

  • Anywhere tropical; I want to lie on the beach and get a tan!
  • An amusement park; I crave thrills and fun!
  • A roadtrip with my fam; it's fun seeing new places and trying new things!
  • Rome, Paris, London; I want to soak up the culture in Europe!

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Autonomy
Autonomy posted in Family Issues:
"StarrChild" wrote: Two years ago my parents broke up. I was never really the same after that point. My mother she began to just not care about anything. She would go out clubbing every Friday and would yell at me for my attitude towards it. Why would I be okay with her doing that??? I didn't really realise it but I began feeling kind of depressed. Of course we didn't fight all the time but when we did I would always end up crying alone in my room. And it would be really painful. One time I cried every night for a week because of her. A week ago, I felt really sick at school so I went to the sick bay but my Mum refused to believe I was sick. She thought I was lying and being over dramatic as usual. I felt really horrible after that, that the teacher sent me to the guidance councellor and almost immediately I burst into tears. I didn't even know why I did but the councellor did a little test on me and came to the conclusion I was slightly depressed and had anxiety. It wasn't really surprising but hearing it out loud just felt really weird. Even after knowing that fact my mother doesn't really act any different. She's not a bad person I swear but she can just be really horrible at times. Anyways, that's technically whats been happening in my life lol. Nothing really interesting Oh dear, that sounds like a dreadful situation. I've lived through similar difficulties in my own life, and my heart goes out to you, truly. May I offer you some advice? I don't have the cure to your problems or a magic wand that can make them disappear, but I do believe that some good can come out of your living situation. The first thing I'd like to make note of, is that everyone makes mistakes. As human beings, we have to make mistakes. There's no way around it; it's how we learn and grow. And as we get older, we don't stop making mistakes. Your parents are no exception. Although we look to our parents for guidance, and direction, and support, we have to understand that they aren't perfect people, and they make mistakes. They may not always lead us in the right direction. They may not always set a good example. They may not always be there for us, to encourage us and support us when we need them most. And that's okay. Everyone makes mistakes, and we have to accept that. But we can't let allow other people's mistakes to hurt us, my dear. And I know it hurts. Your mum might not understand how her actions make you feel. You said you haven't been the same since your parents divorced, and I know how challenging that can be to go through. But you know, some of the brightest, wisest, and happiest people I've met, are people who have dealt with difficult problems in their lives, and used them to grow as people. You can let your parents' mistakes get to you, and make you upset and depressed; or, you can accept that they aren't perfect people, accept that they make mistakes, and accept that their mistakes don't have anything to do with you. So here's what you do, friend: you can't stop your mum from going clubbing, and that's okay. Don't try to. Don't fight with her about it. You can let her know how it makes you feel, but don't get into an argument. Accept the situation for what it is. Your mother is her own person, and she is accountable for what she does; you aren't. Next time you start to get in a fight or an argument with her, just step back, and withdraw yourself. Try it, see what happens. Once you decide not to let other peoples' failings affect you--and you do have the power to do this--then you'll find a sense of peace you probably haven't felt before. And you'll learn from your mistakes, and the mistakes of your parents, and everyone around you, and you'll be a better person. Press on.
reply 23 minutes
Dounuts
Dounuts posted in Family Issues:
Go to your neighbor's house and ask him/her to call to police.Everything will be just fine.
reply about 6 hours
RavenClawRaina
my ex is going through the same thing. Call the police now. Things will get out of hand. My brothers friend has been living with us for about 2 weeks becuz his dad punched him in the face. Call 911 now. They will help you. Just say you have been abused by your family member and they will take it from there. If you want, add me and we can talk
reply about 7 hours
XxRuby_PhoenixxX
If you are getting abused to the point where you bleed, call the police immediately. This isn't acceptable behavior.
reply about 7 hours
MRAP
MRAP posted in Family Issues:
Hey, Just wanted some advice to help me on what to do on this. Ever since I was 3 I've been both Verbally, Mentally, And Physically abused. To me, this is normal since it's been happening for so long. But I just can't take this thing anymore. When I get home I always get yelled at for no reason. I have been on Anti-Depressants for the past 1-2 years. Been going to counseling for 6-7 years for family. Nothing has changed yet. I just need help on how to handle this. Thanks.
reply about 7 hours