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Dear Dish-It: I LOVE Him!

Dear Dish-It,


I have a crush on a boy in school and I REALLY need to tell him that I love him because there is a party that I want him to be my date for. What do I do?


MGA


Dear MGA,


First of all, don’t tell him you LOVE him. I know what you think you are feeling right now is love, but it’s not. Love takes a long time – sometimes years – to really form. The most important thing about love is it’s only real when the other person loves you back. So don’t tell him you love him – it is a recipe for disaster.


You need to understand that guys work and think and feel differently than girls do. Girls are very emotional creatures. We like to talk about our feelings and we like to listen to other people talk about their feelings. We love it when people we care about tell us how they feel about us. Guys are quite the opposite, in most cases.


Of course guys have emotions, but they do not need to express them verbally as much as we girls do. In fact, talking about feelings with anyone can be very hard for some guys to do. So instead of being all intense and dropping the “L” bomb on your crush (which will most likely scare him off), you need to act cool, calm and casual and sort of try to approach this dilemma as if you were a guy, too.


What I mean by that is if a guy wants to ask a girl to be his date to a party, it may make him nervous to do so but once he decides to go ahead and do it the way he does it is very casually. He doesn’t admit all his feelings for her in one go. He may even pretend that he just wants to go with a friend to make the situation as easy and stress-free as possible.


If you really like this guy and you’re not willing to wait and see if he will ask you out first (which will happen if he likes you), then I suppose the best thing to do is to ask him (and only him – not his friends, not through your friends, but directly from your mouth to his ear) to go to the party with you. Do it calmly, and don’t make a big deal out of it.


The one thing you need to be prepared for if you decide to do this, though, is the fact he might say “no.” So please remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea. You are young and this is not the last boy you’ll crush on. Also, you’ll go on many other dates to many other parties with many other boys before you find your true love, so don’t take his rejection badly if it happens. You’re still a great girl, and it’s really his loss.


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


More Dish-It Advice:

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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    bffeaea
    bffeaea posted in Friends:
    I don't know you and I'm not exactly sure how you act, but being friendly is definitely the way to go. Don't change yourself for ANYBODY. Especially someone who you don't need to impress. Speaking of impressing, don't try, do. If you are telling a story and that happens to impress them than that's great! But don't go out of your way to try to make yourself look awesome because I'm sure you already are. Be yourself. But the most important thug now you can do is not try to make a million friends. Because personally I would rather have one AWESOME friend than a million ok friends. I hope this helped. :)
    reply about 14 hours
    HoneyHamstern
    HoneyHamstern posted in Friends:
    Be yourself and most important of all, be kind. You will get great friends by doing so. Being popular doesn't always mean being nice; sometimes people tend to be rude and bossy to be "popular" and that isn't good. But if you participate or even start a group at school, at the library or somewhere important in the community (community service like the Rotary Club is a good way to start for kids and teens) can be a great way to meet friends and share your happiness.
    reply about 15 hours
    esthery27
    "f3rr3tgal" wrote:dear dish-it,        I absolutely love my family but... my dad has these headaches  where if they are really bad i can not say anything right he will get really mad. i don't know what to do i really hate being yelled at by my  dad and i love him soo much !!!! what do i do?  [s:sm3/1jvp]                                                       thanks,                                                            f3rr3tgal Tell him that you love him and you understand he's suffering but you really don't like it when he yells at you. You can write a note or a card to him. I'm sure he'll understand. And of course if needed see a doctor so that he'll know what to do to deal with those headaches.
    reply about 15 hours
    esthery27
    esthery27 posted in Friends:
    You won't want to be, it's exhausting. Just be happy the way you are and don't care about what others think or say about you.
    reply about 16 hours
    GiddyUpGecko
    GiddyUpGecko posted in Friends:
    What if you just aren't populr, and you want to be???  :(
    reply 1 day