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Dear Dish-It, My Parents Made Us Break Up

Dear Dish-It, is here to whisper "ttyl after I've thought about this some more".

Dear Dish-It,

Last year me and my BF had to break up cuz of letters my sister found that me and my BF wrote to each other. It's been a year now and I still can't stop thinking about him! We saw each other behind our parents' backs and then they found out and we lost their trust. Now I've got my 'rents trust back cuz he moved away. I talk bad about him around my Mom and Dad, but in my heart I love him. What can I do?
Babybluez


Dear Babybluez,

This is not lookin' good for you. You kinda handled the whole thing the wrong way, it seems. Well, here's what you gotta do: keep on crushin' on the ex, but try to move on at the same time. I have no idea what you two were writin' in those letters that your sis found but it musta been some big No-No for your 'rents to react so harshly. You've already lost their trust once, no need to up and do it again. Just keep your lingering feelings for this dude to yourself and move on. He's moved away, and it's probably for the best. Eventually you will get over him and one day you might even meet someone that your 'rents will approve of. But next time, axe the incriminating letter writing, k? Hang in there and good luck.


Dear Dish-It,

Well, to get to the point, I'm 12 and I'm going out with this 15 year-old guy. It feels like we're soulmates cuz we have A LOT in common. Well, I don't know how to tell my parents about it. I'm afraid they'll make us break up or something like that. What should I do?
Toxic_Dolphin69

Dear Toxic_Dolphin69,

That's a tough situation. If you think your parents will tell you to break up, then you probably know why they'll want you to do it too. Is it because they don't want you dating at 12? Is it because they'll object to the age difference? Before you tell your parents, think up some calm, rational responses to their potential concerns. If I were you, I'd also think up some compromises/solutions - like tell 'em, if they let you keep datin' him, you'll promise not to go out alone on dates with him, only group events. The solutions depend on your parents' issues, but you get the picture, right? The key here is to be calm and mature about this. No matter how rough this conversation may be, you gotta tell 'em. If they don't find out from you, but find out from the neighbor or some other random person, you'll not only lose your BF, you'll lose your parents' trust too.

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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Dear Dish-It in the forums

simran88
simran88 posted in Style:
Clothes...
reply 41 minutes
simran88
simran88 posted in Style:
Great suggestions! I'll try the tape idea, have never done it before. 
reply about 1 hour
arthi
arthi posted in Friends:
"shae508" wrote: "classicalmusicisepic" wrote: my friends offline are having some relationship problems atm and there are just some things i want to mention on here, because i think they're relevant; some warning signs, etc and how to approach them. these not only apply to romantic relationships, but also friendships etc. physical harm - this might be an obvious one. but i just want to share some ways to approach the situation. this includes unwanted touching, hitting, kicking, etc. if your partner is doing this to you, you must report it to a trusted adult, teacher, counselor, close friend, or family member. this is one of the most serious abusive relationships- there are many resources online such as childline, etc, and hotlines you can call if you need to speak to someone about it. they may be able to help you get out of the relationship, and give you a shoulder to cry on. pressure into unwanted intimacy - this is also one of the big ones- your partner should never make you feel uncomfortable or otherwise. if they wish to stay with you, they will wait until you're ready to move onto that stage; if you even ever will be. if you feel pressured, or pushed into doing something you feel you'll regret, sit down and talk about it with your partner. you have a say in your relationship, too. control over your friends - if you feel like your partner has control over your friends- something is wrong. if they want you to dedicate every second of your life to them, with no other people, it's not right. your relationship not only affects the two people in it, (or more if it's polyamourous), but everyone around is affected by your relationship, too. again- you have a say in how your relationship is going, too!   criticizing you and your choices - relationships are about liking each other- if your partner is putting you down or demeaning you, it's a warning sign to get out of it. are they mocking you? or putting down your appearance, clothes, etc? Definite red flag; talk about it with him/her/them.  other signs, include: -being doted and adored one day, and the next being pushed away and ignored, -you're afraid of your partner -they obsess over and call/text you constantly -you may find you've lost your confidence -many ups and downs in the relationship, constant roller coaster -you aren't yourself. you change and adapt for them, drop hobbies if they're not into them, etc. -something tells you you cant trust them again, there are many resources out there if you need to talk. never be afraid to speak about it to someone- a family member, a teacher, a close friend, the police, a guidance counselor, etc.  I bolded that one part. The whole thread is great. And that one is a sign. But remember people with mental illness may also show signs like this to. If they have a good they they may spoil you and love you, and then the next day they're having a bad one. So they might push you away. They also may suddenly dote on you one day also to make up for a bad day. I'm not making an excuse, it's still a ver bad thing to do. I'm just putting it out there.
reply about 3 hours
lelnah
lelnah posted in Friends:
"Tldc_Julisha" wrote:I'm in the popular group but im trying to figure out if maybe its time to stop being in the popular group or notI like being in the group but at the same time I don't because-The other girls in the popular group are kind mean to othersThey make fun of people who don't wear what we wearThey push/shove people into lockersIs it time to leave the popular group or should I stay there??? Of course not! What kinds of people just go through their everyday lives shoving good kids into hard metal lockers? It's not right. I would never associate myself with a group like that. What kind of popular is that, shoving kids into lockers?  
reply about 12 hours
Hannah728
Hannah728 posted in Friends:
Ok i have the same problem with every guy! I have a crush on the cutest guy and i think somebody else likes him! And i mean like for sure think that they like him!
reply about 15 hours

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