Every time I try to talk with my dad, he seems to never listen and starring into space. i want to tell him whats wrong and how I feel but I never can get the words out. i get really nervous and don't know what to say. its like me and him are weird talking face to face. I know he is my dad and all but there seems like no way I can talk to my dad. when I try he just gets angry or annoyed with me, so I never shared anything with him. he never ask whats the matter or how im doing even tho he did raise me on his own..it seems like where just not connected as we used to be when I was small. ever since my mom passed, I have been lost into a great darkness of sorrow, i had to take care of all my siblings which was a bid responsibility for me at age 9 but my dad just stopped smiling and being happy. sometimes I can make him laugh but its not enough to fix every ones problems. since I was nine I became sad and depress even tho I don't show it, all I do is ball my feelings up and pretend nothing happen. so tell me..what should I do?
He cares about you, but there are time when adults get sad and their reaction to something like this might be different from how you react to things. You may have dealt with the pain of losing your Mom by (remember this is just an example) spending all your time with your friends and your new responsibility. But at least you found a way to deal with it. It might be possible that your Dad haven't yet been able to figure out with the loss yet! By helping him to deal with it, you will find that you are helping yourself too. One day, he might return back to his responsibility and how he was before, not quite same but something like it! But till than, I hope you remember that he is your father no matter what, and he still loves you the same as before and cares and worries about you and your little siblings!
I dunno and maybe this is the horrible suggestion but... could you arrange to go somewhere with your Dad that was special to you all when your Mum was here.. then when you get there see how it goes and both you remember how you miss her... together.
My family is tearing bit by bit and fighting is non stop
I just still try to make everything all right but It's too late
So I really don't know what on earth i should do because
If it gets to late, I cant fix anything and I'll just have to adjust
And lately I've been feeling left out, I don't know why but
I need to fix everything before time runs out.