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Posted over 4 years ago

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Posts: 5

The year of 1916.
I be the the trenches.
I see as planes fly overhead.
I think to myself.
Why am I here?


A quick poem. 
I might make this into a short novel. Please tell me what you think of it. Thanks Wink


Posted over 4 years ago

Posted By:

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Lock e1691472cafece64304be81c5c9c507a93800d3a6cd5948297266277351b71ef
Brilliant


Posted over 4 years ago

Posted By:

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Posts: 5

Thanks smile


Posted over 4 years ago

Posted By:

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its good,it seems to be about war(it it is,what war?),it explains the setting,but i would give more details about the trench so readers can visualize it (just a suggestion,you don't have to take it)

I live in America and I love anime.Here's what I wanna say to you : BLUE CHICKENS AND MONKEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Toriko
One of my favorite animes
toriko


Posted over 4 years ago

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Posts: 9211

i like it. nicely done.

Being normal is so boring~
Why not be insane instead?
Devil

6000th post 9/16/2014 6:13 PM Big Grin
8888th post 3/27/2015 (For you huge! Big Grin)


Posted over 4 years ago

Posted By:

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Lock e1691472cafece64304be81c5c9c507a93800d3a6cd5948297266277351b71ef
It's okay. I don't really have a lot of structure to base it off of. But, it's decent. I've seen better and worse for short poems.


Posted over 4 years ago

Posted By:

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Nice poem, I liked the way you've questioned yourself in the poem too smile 
I think it was really good, anyways c; 


Posted over 4 years ago

Posted By:

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"membershipgirl" wrote:

Nice poem, I liked the way you've questioned yourself in the poem too smile 

I think it was really good, anyways c; 


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