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Poetry & Stories
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1916

Posted By:
musicpenguin
musicpenguin
Member since:
September, 2012
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Status: Offline
Posts: 5
The year of 1916.
I be the the trenches.
I see as planes fly overhead.
I think to myself.
Why am I here?


A quick poem. 
I might make this into a short novel. Please tell me what you think of it. Thanks Wink


1916

Posted By:
Baby260
Baby260
Member since:
April, 2011
StarStarStarStarStar
Status: Offline
Posts: 10035
Brilliant


1916

Posted By:
musicpenguin
musicpenguin
Member since:
September, 2012
Star
Status: Offline
Posts: 5
Thanks smile

1916

Posted By:
lemonadewithbrownies
lemonadewithbrownies
Member since:
May, 2012
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Status: Offline
Posts: 294
its good,it seems to be about war(it it is,what war?),it explains the setting,but i would give more details about the trench so readers can visualize it (just a suggestion,you don't have to take it)

I live in america and I love anime.Here's what I wanna say to you : BLUE CHICKENS AND MONKEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Toriko
One of my favorite animes
toriko


1916

Posted By:
shae508
shae508
Member since:
January, 2012
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Status: Offline
Posts: 3082
i like it. nicely done.


1916

Posted By:
Yeliak
Yeliak
Member since:
May, 2010
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Status: Offline
Posts: 951
It's okay. I don't really have a lot of structure to base it off of. But, it's decent. I've seen better and worse for short poems.


1916

Posted By:
membershipgirl
membershipgirl
Member since:
July, 2011
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Status: Offline
Posts: 5532
Nice poem, I liked the way you've questioned yourself in the poem too smile 
I think it was really good, anyways c; 


1916

Posted By:
RawrSkittles=)
RawrSkittles=)
Member since:
July, 2011
StarStarStarStarStar
Status: Offline
Posts: 14779

"membershipgirl" wrote:

Nice poem, I liked the way you've questioned yourself in the poem too smile 

I think it was really good, anyways c; 

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