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Dear Dish-It, He Says a Girl Punked Me Out

Dear Dish-It,

My (X) boyfriend broke up with me because (he says) that a girl punked me out. We were friends, but now I have funny feelings being around her because I don't like her 4 what she did. Anyways he dumped me and I wanted 2 cry cuz I was going 2 dump him that very same day, but I got scared & he got 2 it first. He also said we are in the same class at the same school & I was getting him into 2 much trouble & he was tired of it. But the part that really hurt me was that he told my friends before me. Then, worst of all, at the school lunchtable, he told me the bad news. My best friend knew and didn't tell me.
Sweet


Dear Sweet,

Okay, where should I begin. You're hurt. Even if you were going to dump your boy first, it still sucks to be the dumpee... particularly when you wanted to be the dumper. I know it doesn't sound too cool but the truth is everyone gets all "hey you can't dump me cuz I was going to dump you first." What's really funny is everybody feels like that, no matter how old. As for the girl who punked you out - walk away. Don't give her another thought. You and your boy are none of her business (unless she's his sister and she was giving him the heads-up on your dumping plan. Then, who can blame her.)But I figure the real pain is the betrayal - your friend was no friend when she didn't keep watch for you. What's that all about? I'm not suggesting you have it out with her, but call that girl up and tell her you're choked. Ask her wassup? Honestly, I can't think of a good excuse but she might have one. So let her tell you. You're already down a boy, you don't wanna be down a girl too... do ya?


Dear Dish-It,

Me and my boyfriend broke up, too. I was hoping to get him back, because of my looks (which is why he liked me in the first place) and my trendy style, but it didn't work. After 6 weeks in school he came back and asked me to go out with him. I said no and walked away. He ran toward me and said "listen, me and you go good together because, as they say, ugly meaning me and beautiful you, go together." I was so suprised he had said that. I smiled at him and said "...NO!" and walked away. I turned around and said "You should've stayed with me and not gone with anyone else!" and turned right back around. Lookin' mad at himself, he went to his 5th period class. I'm sorry, but I got a boyfriend and you should have listened... I thought.
CHAQUITA


Dear CHAQUITA,

It's great to hear that you take so much pride in yourself. Everyone should have your confidence. But ease up girl, cuz you sound about as deep as a puddle. It's nice to look good and know your own style - but that ain't what I'm hearing from you. Being trending isn't knowning your own style it's buying into everyone else's. Personally, I don't want to show up to a gig - be it school or a party - dressed like the rest. More up - it's all about the filling... who you are as person, not how your package is labelled. That said, you definitely put your X in his place and it sounds like he deserved it. Love yourself and the rest of them will come runnin'.


So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to .


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    Dear Dish-It in the forums

    astucieuse331
    astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
    I've always felt the same way. My one best friend gossiped behind my back, used me, all that girl stuff. She took me for advantage and we had a bunch of fights because of her finding a new friend and completely acting as if I didn't exist, and I told her to give me at least some attention every once in a while if she can't even continue to talk to me daily. And.. I lost her. Well, she lost me. We both lost each other. But then I realized.. it's the people that you least expect to be nice to you you'll find kindness in. Why? Based on personal experience, and I'll tell you the story: For my gym class, me and my peers were supposed to make a group for a dance. This was when my best friend had found a new friend already, and the time at which we had a few fights because of that. Of course, I relied on my best friend to count me in her dance group. At lunchtime, I sat together with my best friend, and we ate our lunches in silence. All of a sudden, I brought up the dance groups and asked her straightforwardly: "Can I join your group?" No reply. "Kelly, can I join your group?" No reply. "I mean, since our class is uneven, I found it fair that there'd be a group of five, you know?" None at all. Kelly ignored me straight off the bat, leaving me speechless. My mind raced with thoughts, and I thought, maybe it's not worth having Kelly as a friend. A few days later, we were playing Dodgeball for gym. I was on Kelly's team, and overheard her talking with her new friends about who to pick for the dance group. One of her friends mentioned me, and Kelly said: "Oh no, we shouldn't pick her because _____ (I don't know what she said then)." I was shocked, but was anticipating it, so when the time came to choose groups, I saw my friend, Luke, ask two girls, Cher and Bridgette, to join their group. Surprisingly, Cher and Bridgette actually accepted him, and so I thought, "Wow, if they accepted Luke, they might accept me aswell!" and so built up the courage to ask them if I could join. Even though Cher and Bridgette were mean to me sometimes, I knew that I had to risk it and see what'd happen. Afterall, rejection is just another opportunity to find a better group. Little did I know, it'd be the best choice of my life. They were so happy, and even thanked me for joining them! I was speechless once more; I never knew that the peers that I thought I would never be friends with would actually be my friends!  So yeah, that's what I learnt, and I never regretted learning that fact. Ever since then, though, I've learnt not to trust people as much as I used to anymore. I learnt that independency is what works for me, what I was meant for in terms of socializing or working. But, other things may work for you. If you still want a friend, you can be independent and wait for the right person. However, if you still want a real friend, you can wait, but still mingle (hang out) with other people! I I'm not going to make fun of you because I know how you've felt, just as I stated in my past problem before. But you can move on from those friends, they're not worth your time and certainly don't deserve you as a friend. Trust me, if it's meant to be, you'll definitely find a true friend. But if it's not, you may become like me, finding happiness in my own way. I want to remind you though-- you don't need someone to stay happy, or keep you company. This may sound silly, but you can even have your own invisible friends! I've had one, but that's very rarely for me. It's not silly though if you see the general idea; usually these friends are made from different dimensions of your personality or just because of will. There's a lot more fish in the sea, though, so I'm sure you'll find a true friend that's meant for you  :) Take care, and I hope you'll find a true friend soon!
    reply about 10 hours
    ts01
    ts01 posted in Friends:
    im so sorry you girls feel that way.true friends are there, its just easier to find users because they are more plentiful. dont give up, you will find real friends eventually
    reply about 11 hours
    lolflowergirl
    lolflowergirl posted in Friends:
    i feel alone too
    reply about 13 hours
    kayme123
    kayme123 posted in Friends:
    i know the feeling. but i got taken off a website instead of my friends. i can assure you they probably feel the same and are missing you, BUT its not worth dwelling over it. friends come and go without any choice in life and trust me, i lost the love of my life and my two of the best friends in the world. The thing is, you have to move on, because they wouldent want you feeling sad over them right? they'd want you to be the happy person you were when you were with them! for starters, i'll be your friend so your not scared to make some new ones. To be honest, i went through the exact same thing as you did and it DOES hurt very bad. But once you find some people that are willing to make you feel better, you know you've chosen the right friends again
    reply about 22 hours
    Irene_love
    Irene_love posted in Style:
    "1.am.3m0" wrote:Hey. Im also turning 15 soon. So dont worry you arent alone hahah. Start dressing for your shape and also find whats comfortable.  Because if you wear something that is uncomfortable you wont be happy and happiness is the best look :) Most of the time I wear jeans with a graphic tshirt or singlet and a cardigan or light jacket. Hoodies are great for winter. And I wear combat boots like doc martins and converse. Hope I helped somehow! :)
    reply about 23 hours

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