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Dear Dish-It, How Do I Know if He Likes Me?

Dear Dish-It,

I am crushing on this boy but I don’t know if he likes me back. What should I do to find out if he likes me back?

Crushing

Dear Crushing,

Guys are funny creatures. Unlike girls, who give out clear-cut signals of interest, boys have a tendency to mix them all up. There are so many games and so many tactics they try before they will actually admit to a girl that they like her. Furthermore, the signs they give usually don't seem like signs of attraction at all! The following signs that are a dead-giveaway that he likes you:

His body speaks volumes about his feelings.

He might start talking differently around you - either acting louder in your presence to attract your attention or suddenly getting all shy and quiet. Watch him carefully when you're around. Does he move closer to you whenever he can? When you chat, does he look you right in the eye?

Actions speak louder than words.

Guys find it hard to say, straight-up, "I like you." Instead he might start treating you like one of the guys - picking on you and teasing you. It sounds bizarre but he'll do anything to get your attention. If he's got it really bad, he'll stick up for you in any situation, even if he knows you're in the wrong.

By your side.

On the other hand, he could act like a real Casanova, praising you for no apparent reason. Is he super-friendly toward you? Is he always around you during class, at recess or when you're walking home from school?

You make him nervous.

Does he get edgy when you're around? Of course, he could be a jittery kinda guy but unless you're a really scary chick, chances are he likes you and is worried about making a fool of himself when you're around. If he blushes when you talk to him he might as well be wearing a huge neon sign over his head that says, "I love you!"

You're under surveillance.

You're the favourite topic of conversation. He's talking to his friends and your friends about you. Asking questions about you, recounting times you spent together and getting up the courage to speak to you. When you are around it's a constant blitz of calls and texts to your cell and half the time he says he's called you by mistake... yeah, right! The truth is he just wants to get to know you better and probably to check out whether he's got any competition.

What to do about it?

If your crush has three or more of these symptoms, it's almost certain he really likes you. What are you going to do about it? Maybe it's time to trust your gut and take action. He will certainly be grateful if you make the first move. Crushes are very complicated! There's never any right or wrong way to go about your situation. Here are some ideas:

  • Talk to his friends (especially guy friends) about him if you want to find out if he likes you or if he's asked about you. Ask them how they think he feels about you.
  • Of course, the best thing to do is to tell him how you feel. You can call him, write him a letter/e-mail or have a friend tell him, but the best way is to tell him in person.
  • Ask him if he would like to hang out with you and a group of friends somewhere. Show him some attention by talking to him a lot and flirting with him in a friendly easy-going way. In the end, you'll know where the two of you stand (if he likes you or not, and in what way). If it doesn't work out, then it wasn't meant to be.

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.

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How Do You Know You're Crushing?

  • I daydream about the person 24/7.
  • I feel like I'm gonna puke.
  • I blush big-time!
  • All of the above - and so much more.

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

astucieuse331
astucieuse331 posted in Friends:
I've always felt the same way. My one best friend gossiped behind my back, used me, all that girl stuff. She took me for advantage and we had a bunch of fights because of her finding a new friend and completely acting as if I didn't exist, and I told her to give me at least some attention every once in a while if she can't even continue to talk to me daily. And.. I lost her. Well, she lost me. We both lost each other. But then I realized.. it's the people that you least expect to be nice to you you'll find kindness in. Why? Based on personal experience, and I'll tell you the story: For my gym class, me and my peers were supposed to make a group for a dance. This was when my best friend had found a new friend already, and the time at which we had a few fights because of that. Of course, I relied on my best friend to count me in her dance group. At lunchtime, I sat together with my best friend, and we ate our lunches in silence. All of a sudden, I brought up the dance groups and asked her straightforwardly: "Can I join your group?" No reply. "Kelly, can I join your group?" No reply. "I mean, since our class is uneven, I found it fair that there'd be a group of five, you know?" None at all. Kelly ignored me straight off the bat, leaving me speechless. My mind raced with thoughts, and I thought, maybe it's not worth having Kelly as a friend. A few days later, we were playing Dodgeball for gym. I was on Kelly's team, and overheard her talking with her new friends about who to pick for the dance group. One of her friends mentioned me, and Kelly said: "Oh no, we shouldn't pick her because _____ (I don't know what she said then)." I was shocked, but was anticipating it, so when the time came to choose groups, I saw my friend, Luke, ask two girls, Cher and Bridgette, to join their group. Surprisingly, Cher and Bridgette actually accepted him, and so I thought, "Wow, if they accepted Luke, they might accept me aswell!" and so built up the courage to ask them if I could join. Even though Cher and Bridgette were mean to me sometimes, I knew that I had to risk it and see what'd happen. Afterall, rejection is just another opportunity to find a better group. Little did I know, it'd be the best choice of my life. They were so happy, and even thanked me for joining them! I was speechless once more; I never knew that the peers that I thought I would never be friends with would actually be my friends!  So yeah, that's what I learnt, and I never regretted learning that fact. Ever since then, though, I've learnt not to trust people as much as I used to anymore. I learnt that independency is what works for me, what I was meant for in terms of socializing or working. But, other things may work for you. If you still want a friend, you can be independent and wait for the right person. However, if you still want a real friend, you can wait, but still mingle (hang out) with other people! I I'm not going to make fun of you because I know how you've felt, just as I stated in my past problem before. But you can move on from those friends, they're not worth your time and certainly don't deserve you as a friend. Trust me, if it's meant to be, you'll definitely find a true friend. But if it's not, you may become like me, finding happiness in my own way. I want to remind you though-- you don't need someone to stay happy, or keep you company. This may sound silly, but you can even have your own invisible friends! I've had one, but that's very rarely for me. It's not silly though if you see the general idea; usually these friends are made from different dimensions of your personality or just because of will. There's a lot more fish in the sea, though, so I'm sure you'll find a true friend that's meant for you  :) Take care, and I hope you'll find a true friend soon!
reply about 14 hours
ts01
ts01 posted in Friends:
im so sorry you girls feel that way.true friends are there, its just easier to find users because they are more plentiful. dont give up, you will find real friends eventually
reply about 15 hours
lolflowergirl
lolflowergirl posted in Friends:
i feel alone too
reply about 17 hours
kayme123
kayme123 posted in Friends:
i know the feeling. but i got taken off a website instead of my friends. i can assure you they probably feel the same and are missing you, BUT its not worth dwelling over it. friends come and go without any choice in life and trust me, i lost the love of my life and my two of the best friends in the world. The thing is, you have to move on, because they wouldent want you feeling sad over them right? they'd want you to be the happy person you were when you were with them! for starters, i'll be your friend so your not scared to make some new ones. To be honest, i went through the exact same thing as you did and it DOES hurt very bad. But once you find some people that are willing to make you feel better, you know you've chosen the right friends again
reply 1 day
Irene_love
Irene_love posted in Style:
"1.am.3m0" wrote:Hey. Im also turning 15 soon. So dont worry you arent alone hahah. Start dressing for your shape and also find whats comfortable.  Because if you wear something that is uncomfortable you wont be happy and happiness is the best look :) Most of the time I wear jeans with a graphic tshirt or singlet and a cardigan or light jacket. Hoodies are great for winter. And I wear combat boots like doc martins and converse. Hope I helped somehow! :)
reply 1 day

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