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Dear Dish-It: I’m Being Bullied At School

Dear Dish-It,

I'm being bullied at school. Not physically, but with words. One guy calls me a nerd and stupid. I try to ignore it but one time I told him to shut up and leave me alone. I know he's just taking out his own problems on me and other girls. I want to yell at the top of my lungs. What should I do?

true2myself

Dear true2myself,

bullying is so awful. It sucks to be bullied and, believe it or not, it sucks to be a bully, too.

Lots of experts have studied bullies and bullying. They wonder what makes some kids pick on other kids. And do you know what a lot of these psychologists and behavioral scientists have found? That bullies suffer from a lot of problems, just like you said. They have low self-esteem, and feel they need to take their hatred of themselves or anger about their lives out on other people. They may have problems at home with their parents, or they may feel like they have no friends at school. So they act tough and say and do mean things to people they are jealous of.

It sounds to me like the bully at your school has something else going on in his life that you don’t know about. Ignoring him is definitely one solution. Another idea would be, if you feel comfortable and safe doing so, actually talking to this guy and asking him if there’s anything wrong. Maybe he just needs someone – a friend – to reach out to him? The other option is to talk to an adult – a teacher or one of your parents – about how you feel. They may have some good suggestions as to what you can do to fix the situation or make it better.

Whatever you do, don’t think for a minute that you’re being bullied because there’s something wrong with you. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. There’s something wrong with your bully.

So, ya gotta burnin' question? Need some love directions? Thinkin' 'bout stuff like depression, sex,how ya feel 'bout YOURSELF (that's called "self-esteem"), boyfriends, girlfriends, losin' old friends, bullyin' or peer pressure, but too scared to ask the parents? Don't be scared to Dish-It here. Send all of your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com But 'member, if ya hang out in Chat with other Kidzworld members who know ya by your 'username', ya might wanna use a secret nickname when ya write in. That way no one'll ever know it's you. And, just in case ya don't know, Dish-It gets a lotta letters everyday, and she can't answer 'em all. So keep checkin' the column cuz she's prob'ly answerin' somethin' very similar to your question while you're out doin' somethin' else. K? And Thanks! Ya keep her outta trouble. Oh! And if ya've got words of wisdom you wanna share,We'll dish 'em up, too.

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Have You Been Bullied?

  • Yeah, at school i get bullied
  • I've been bullied in the past
  • No, I've never been bullied
  • No... but I've bullied other people

Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Abbergrl
Abbergrl posted in Family Issues:
My mom can be that way too. There's nothing like that, you're exagerating, you dont even know what you're talking about. When all tthaat time I was going through it. She didn't have a clue honestly.
reply about 18 hours
StarrChild
Two years ago my parents broke up. I was never really the same after that point. My mother she began to just not care about anything. She would go out clubbing every Friday and would yell at me for my attitude towards it. Why would I be okay with her doing that??? I didn't really realise it but I began feeling kind of depressed. Of course we didn't fight all the time but when we did I would always end up crying alone in my room. And it would be really painful. One time I cried every night for a week because of her. A week ago, I felt really sick at school so I went to the sick bay but my Mum refused to believe I was sick. She thought I was lying and being over dramatic as usual. I felt really horrible after that, that the teacher sent me to the guidance councellor and almost immediately I burst into tears. I didn't even know why I did but the councellor did a little test on me and came to the conclusion I was slightly depressed and had anxiety. It wasn't really surprising but hearing it out loud just felt really weird. Even after knowing that fact my mother doesn't really act any different. She's not a bad person I swear but she can just be really horrible at times. Anyways, that's technically whats been happening in my life lol. Nothing really interesting
reply about 19 hours
Froggers
theres this guy that i really REALLY like, im not sure if he likes me back. i put my mobile # on a piece of paper and slipped it in his locker, he hasn't texted or called me yet. Today at lunch i asked his friend to ask if he likes anyone but his friend keeps lying to me and won't tell me if he said anything. The guy and I were best friends in 5th grade but now that we're in different classes we don't talk much anymore. My friends said that i have a chance with him and that we have a lot in common, but im pretty sure he likes this other girl but im also pretty sure he likes me. I want to make a move but i don't wanna end our friendship i don't know what to do.
reply 1 day
LUCYQWERTY123
LUCYQWERTY123 posted in Friends:
it can be anyone u want but it should be someone who has the true friendship qualities and trust-worhtiness :) :)
reply 1 day
drowning
drowning posted in Friends:
It's good to have both to talk too about things. But, what's the point of being with someone if you can't trust them enough to even tell them things?
reply 1 day