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Dear Dish-It: Do I Do Long-Distance?

Dear Dish-It,


I've been going out with this AMAZING girl for about 4 months. She means the world to me. We clicked on the first day and are still going strong. We relate to each other well but something recently slowed our relationship. Two weeks ago she moved to Egypt with plans to stay there for a year. I was devastated, even though I knew of the move long before it came – it hit me all at once on that day. I’m lonely without her, as pitiful as it may sound. The situation has got me asking questions like are the 5-10 minute conversations per day enough to make it through the year? Is it worth the wait? Do long-distance relationships ever work? Can I trust her?


JustCurious


Dear JC,


I’m sorry to hear your love has left for a year. However, I don’t think the situation is as bad – or as difficult – as you are making it out to be. First and foremost, you need to remember how lucky you are to have already found someone you care about so much, and who seems to care about you a whole lot in return. Some people have a much harder time finding love – that’s something to feel good about, whether it is forever or not.


I’m sorry you feel so lonely without your girlfriend, but what happened to all your other friends, and your family? Did they go to Egypt, too? I’m guessing the answer to that is no, and this may be a good opportunity for you to reconnect with the other people in your life. It sounds like, while your girlfriend was close, you may have neglected your other relationships in favor of hanging out with and getting closer to her. But the truth is, no matter what kind of relationship you find yourself in, you need to keep a good support system of other people around you – you never know when you may need them.


In terms of the long-distance thing, you have to know that thinking about stereotypes and over-generalizing the situation is never a good idea. What may be true for others isn’t necessarily true for you. If you’re feeling like you want out of the relationship while it isn’t one you can experience in person, then I suggest you talk to your girlfriend about that and let her know that you may be willing to try and pick things up again where they left off once she returns home, but that it’s just too hard for you to have a relationship where you’re separated by an entire ocean. She may not understand where you’re coming from or feel the same way, but you need to do what’s best for you at this point in your life.


If you do want to be with her and continue trying to work on the relationship despite her being so far away, then that’s what you should do. In this case, only time will tell whether things will work out between the two of you or not. But if you love her and want to be with her, then isn’t it worth taking the chance to find out?


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


More Dish-It Advice:

  • Can My Long-Distance Relationship Work?
  • My Girlfriend Moved Away
  • I Like A Girl In Another Country
  • Should I Just Forget Her?
  • 2 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    yugimutoz
    just message him about the situation over text or social media! tell him you still want to be friends & you don't want to let things be so awkward anymore between you two. ^__^
    reply about 13 hours
    SimplyAda
    Gurlll, i also can't start conversations either. Well since it's summer? Do you know his social media... like Twitter or Instagram? You can try messaging him about how you feel. I know it seems crazy but just try. Or just confront him in person when you see him in seventh grade. Confidence is key. If he still continues to ignore you  and avoid you, then he's not worth your time gurll. Just ignore him. And focus on your goals and get big and make sure that he regrets avoiding you.  lol you don't have to do all of that, but good luck   :)
    reply about 13 hours
    SimplyAda
    SimplyAda posted in Friends:
    Yes. They were fake anyways and disrespectful. Had to cut them off.
    reply about 13 hours
    NightSpoon
    Try asking him about his hobbies, whats up, etc. normal stuff. You guys might find some interesting stuff about each other or even more.
    reply 1 day
    MeowAllDay
    So ever since last Monday my crush has been ignoring me, and I didn't want to push him into talking. We smile and wave but that's about it. I don't know how to get a conversation started. I do compliment, and that never works, but I also asked him what his school profile picture was. He answered and the conversation stopped there. Oh, and I don't think I mentioned that my bff doesn't really like him at all.
    reply 1 day