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Dear Dish-It: My Dad Doesn't Know I'm Dating

Dear Dish-It,

My friend told me that my boyfriend told her that he’s in love with me. I’m only in Grade 6 and I can’t tell my dad because he’d freak out if he even knew we were dating! Besides, I don’t even know if what she said is true. What do I do?

Lovergirl813


Dear LG813,

If you want to really find out whether or not your boyfriend loves you (or whether or not he even told your friend he loves you in the first place), the best thing to do is to talk to him. If he is someone you feel comfortable enough dating then he is probably also someone you should feel comfortable enough to discuss your feelings with. Going through third parties is never a good idea – it’s like that game kids play called broken telephone. The message can start off one way and, by the time it reaches the last person to hear it, it could have completely changed to mean something else entirely.


The second part of your problem has to do with your dad and the fact that he doesn’t even know that you’re dating anyone. In this case you have two options: you can keep on “lying” to him (not saying anything is considered lying by some people but others will tell you if your dad doesn’t ask you any questions directly then not telling him what’s going on isn’t really lying) or, if it’s something that’s really weighing on your mind or making you feel guilty you can decide to tell your dad the truth about your dating life./p>

So really, it seems like both the problems you described in your letter are actually the same. And I think what you need to do in the long-term is to start actually talking to people directly and truthfully, rather than getting your information from third-party sources or sneaking around and lying to people who are important to you and care about your safety and wellbeing. Learning how to do these things is an important part of growing up.


If you've got a burning question, need some love advice or find yourself thinking about things like sex, depression, self-esteem, boyfriends, girlfriends, best friends, bullying or peer pressure, don't hesitate to Dish-It here. Send your questions to deardish@kidzworld.com. And if you hang out in the chat rooms with other Kidzworld members who know you by your username, just send in your secret question using a different nickname if you want to stay anonymous – we promise that no one will ever know it's you. Remember: Dish-It gets a load of letters every day so it may take a while to reply to yours. Keep checking back for her reply, or watch for answered Dish-It questions that are similar to your own.


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Dear Dish-It in the forums

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i know the feeling. but i got taken off a website instead of my friends. i can assure you they probably feel the same and are missing you, BUT its not worth dwelling over it. friends come and go without any choice in life and trust me, i lost the love of my life and my two of the best friends in the world. The thing is, you have to move on, because they wouldent want you feeling sad over them right? they'd want you to be the happy person you were when you were with them! for starters, i'll be your friend so your not scared to make some new ones. To be honest, i went through the exact same thing as you did and it DOES hurt very bad. But once you find some people that are willing to make you feel better, you know you've chosen the right friends again
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