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Dear Dish-It: How Can I Stop Being So Shy?

Dear Dish-It,

What can I do to help myself not be so shy in school?

peaches543


Dear p543,


Lots of kids and adults are shy. Shyness means to feel a little scared when you're around other people. Just about everybody feels shy sometimes. If you're the new kid in class or your great-aunt wants to give you a big hug, it can make you feel shy.


Nobody sits around and says, "Well, I think I'll be shy today." It is just something that happens. It can just sneak up on you. You might feel fine practicing your soccer kicks, but you feel nervous when the coach comes over to give you a few pointers.


But being shy isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's OK if it takes you a while to feel comfortable with new people and new situations. In fact, it can even be helpful to be a little shy. When you're shy, you may spend a little extra time observing the scene before jumping right into it. And you're unlikely to talk to strangers, which you shouldn't do anyway!


Some kids are born shy and more sensitive. Sometimes even babies act shy. Have you ever seen a baby hide his or her face from a stranger? On the other hand, another baby might kick, smile, and wave at everyone, even strangers.


But if you weren't shy as a little kid, it's still possible to be a shy person. You might have learned to be shy because of experiences you've had at school or home. And sometimes you only feel shy for a short while, like the first time you get on a new school bus. This type of shyness often goes away after you get adjusted. For instance, after a few days, you'll probably have a seat you like to sit in and you'll get to know friends on the bus.


Sometimes, people become so shy they are afraid to do simple things in life. For example, they won't go to a restaurant because they are too nervous to order and pay for their food. Some people are so shy about meeting new people that they rarely go outside. Doctors and psychologists often can help the person work through this kind of shyness.


If your shyness is keeping you from doing stuff you want to do, talk to someone about it. Parents, teachers, counselors, and doctors are all good people to turn to. Talking about your shyness may help you get over it. Or your friends or parents may tell you that they, too, have the same shy feelings and what they do to feel less shy. If you still feel really shy, your mom or dad might take you to see a psychologist. He or she can help you figure out how to feel more at ease around people.


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  • 20 Comments

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    Dear Dish-It In The Forums

    lordoflego
    i also had a friend how is a girl, she liked me and all i had to was ask her out! now we are dating. :)
    reply 1 day
    Cutepandicorn
    Umm...If she is the kind of girl that likes to talk a lot and tells everybody what is going on then the whole school will know when she finds out you like her.  I say who cares if the whole school knows you like her.  I like it if a boy tells me he likes me and ask me out.  I don't like boys trying to be sneaky coz they stink at it and end up looking stupid.  If you want to be sneaky about it you can ask her if she can help you with your homework or ask her if she wants to hang with you and your friends at the mall or you can look at her and smile and see if she smiles back at you.
    reply 1 day
    Jojo132
    well, as a girl i know that i like it when boys are up front with there feelings. girls like to know that they can trust you to tell them the truth no matter who's watching you.  that may show that you really do like her. if you need to do it privately, then mabey if you do any after school activities and she does then ask her then. jojo(: 
    reply 2 days
    Epicryan2
    How would I ask her if she likes me without the entire school knowing? I like her too. Please answer I want to know by today
    reply 2 days
    zoomzoomkitty
    zoomzoomkitty posted in Style:
    Erm, my casual clothes are black and grey. 
    reply 2 days