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Dear Dish-It: I Have Diabetes

Dear Dish-It,


I recently found out I had diabetes. I'm worried that people will look at me different. Will they?


No more sugar


Dear No more sugar,


Dealing with diabetes can stir up a lot of different feelings, especially after you first find out you have diabetes. It's a big change to suddenly have to visit the doctor more often, take medicine and watch what you eat. Let's talk about how your diabetes can make you feel and figure out some ways to feel better.


Your Feelings

When they're first diagnosed, kids with diabetes may worry about what it will mean. Some kids may worry about having to take insulin shots. Other kids with diabetes might be upset if they have to change the way they eat. And all kids with diabetes may wonder, "Why me?" and think, "It isn't fair." Diabetes can also make people feel sad, angry, upset or alone because most of their friends don't have to worry about their blood sugar levels. It's just not something a kid wants.


It's OK to have lots of different feelings about diabetes. Finding out you have it means you have to make a big adjustment. You'll have to get used to taking care of your diabetes and making that care part of your everyday routine. It's not easy to change what you've been doing. But the more you learn about diabetes, the more in control you'll feel and the better you'll be able to handle it as part of everyday life. In other words, dealing with diabetes becomes easier and just part of normal daily life — like brushing your teeth or taking a shower. Let's find out how you get there.


Talk About It

Finding someone to talk to can help you feel better. Kind of like, "Whew, now that's off my chest!" Parents are good people to talk with, and so are other grownups in your life, like grandparents and other relatives. A school counselor or your friends also can be helpful to you.


When you have questions or feelings about diabetes, you can tell your doctor, too. Maybe your doctor's office can help you find other kids with diabetes. They can be really good to talk with because they're going though the same stuff. A diabetes support group - kind of like a club for kids with diabetes - is one way to discover you're not the only kid with diabetes. Your doctor's office can tell you if a support group is available in your area.


No matter how many people they could talk to, some kids find it tough to open up and talk about their feelings. If this is you, maybe you can find another way of expressing what it's like for you. For instance, you could write a letter or draw a picture to show how diabetes makes you feel. You might choose to share this with a parent or someone who's close to you, or you might decide just to keep it private. Even if it's tough, try to tell at least one person how you're feeling.


Remember, it doesn't have to be a big, long talk or anything. Just mentioning what's going on and how it is for you can be enough. It's especially important to tell your parent or your doctor if you're feeling really sad or really angry about things. There are good ways to help you feel better if strong feelings are bothering you. And if someone is bullying you or teasing you because of diabetes, be sure to tell an adult.


Support Group

When more people know about your diabetes, you'll probably feel more comfortable about taking daily trips to the school nurse or other things you might need to do to stay healthy. Your mom or dad can help start this process by talking to your teacher about diabetes and what you need to do to at school to keep it under control (like taking breaks to test blood sugar or eating snacks at certain times). If you decide not to tell many people, that's OK. But most kids decide to tell their close friends. It's hard to hide blood sugar checks, medicine, and eating on time from friends who spend the most time with you. And then, if you need to, you can talk to your friends about how you're feeling.


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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Wonderfulcalico
My parents have always been aggressive and abusive and I only just noticed it a couple months ago. Over time they've gotten worse (specifically my mother). Whenever she gets mad she'll yell at us and if she gets mad enough she'll hit and push us around. Whoever we get into arguments it's always one- sided and she always wins, even if she knows she is wrong. An argument we had not to long ago was about me not taking care of myself. She looked at my hair and started to touch it and told me "Your hair isn't soft why is it so dry, it's probably because you aren't taking care of your hair." Then she goes on to tell me that she's going to cut it and all of this other stuff when she knows I'm conscious about me looking like a boy ( Used to get called a boy for having short hair). As the argument goes on, I start to tell her things that she knows she is wrong about. She proceeds to yell at me then grabs me by the face and say "If you don't lower your tone and listen to what I'm saying I'm going to knock you in the head." Then she goes on to tell me she remembers nothing I was saying and that it's a lie. She also hit me when I didn't clean the laundry room correctly and whenever she gets fed up. I'm constantly having to watch what I say and do, because I'm scared that I'm going to end up hurt. She also likes to degrade me and tell how bad I'm doing. She's said plenty of thing like when I didn't have my bed covers tucked in she yelled at me and hit me and I said "Do you expect me to just stand here and take this", and she replied saying "That's what you are supposed to do you are the child and I am the adult, you take whatever I do until I'm done." Another time is when I had my band concert and I had to pick out the right attire. When we went shopping to get the clothing I chose slacks when she liked a skirt better, we went on to fight in the store and she bought the slacks. When we got home she said to me that real girls wear skirts and dresses and boys wear slacks and pants. This hurt me because she knows I have a past with people telling me I look like a boy etc. Another time I started to sleep on the floor, because I was practicing a minimalist life. When I left my pillows on the floor she found it and questioned me on why they were there. I told her it fell of my bed when really I left it there. Later when I told my dad, he told her and she got mad because I was getting cat hair on my pillows. She then proceeded to ask why I lied and I told her sometimes lying is better then the truth (I knew she would get mad that I was sleeping on the floor so I lied) then she told me that I was never going to have a relationship, a job, or friends ( This hurt me because I don't have friends now). She's also said that I don't take care of my body because I ate two sweets in one day which lead her to banning me from Doritos and now I have to ask to get chips and any other snack. She's told me I don't take care of my teeth because I have yellow spots from using whitening toothpaste with braces on. She's told me I don't take care of my hair so I can't wash it or do any hair style or then a bun. She had lead me to starving myself (Unless she makes me eat) and cutting myself. I've just stopped caring, because what ever I do is always wrong. I never get a choice in my activities, she controls my life in fact she me just in a different body. But what is even worse is that she's turning my dad into her. Now I have a scheduled time to eat breakfast and lunch, and to go onto my electronics. I feel like I'm in a prison with my parents constantly watching over me, in fact yesterday when I was pouring my milk my mom got out a measuring cup and poured my milk into the measuring cup and said "Why isn't this a full cup" and I replied saying "Because I don't measure my milk." Then she got angry at me. There's so much I could say about her, but I'll stop. Anyways my father is always sarcastic and he doesn't realize how much it hurts me. Today I was cleaning out my bag for next school year and my dad came in and said, "Wow, you aren't even dress yet and I had to come up here to tell you how sad." Just little things like that hurt me. My little sister got mad at me last week for sitting in a certain area and she said " Why are you sitting there," and I didn't reply because I didn't want to speak to her and she then said, "Probably because you are too stupid to answer." I wanted to break down crying then and there, but I kept it in. I've limited my talking to her, because all she does is break me down. Like when there was a Proactive commercial and she said, "Ha, you need that." That hurt me because just the other my mom was telling me how I don't take care of my face and that's why I have acne. My older sister and I barely talk, because whenever I try to talk to her she's mad for what ever reason and when my parents were talking about hitting my sister she was in the corner laughing. My cat Preston is very young and I got hi,abo a year ago. I get very sad and often cry, because I've seen him turn out scared and aggressive just like me because he's been through what I have. One time he pooped in a clothes basket (It's right next to his litter box) my mom grabbed him by the neck and hit him while she smothered his face in his poop, all while yelling at him. I was going to call the Animal Protective Services, but I got too scared and I realized how lonely I would be. Please help me I'm not sure what to do anymore. Also sorry for the very long post!
reply 2 days
Error101
Error101 posted in Family Issues:
Dear Kkmr324, I hope you get to feeling better as time goes on.  It does get better but like you said you can't actually get over it.  Losing someone to cancer is awful and I have never lost a friend and I hope I never will and I am so sorry that you did, but I have lost family to cancer and it is horrible.  I hope your okay. :(
reply 4 days
Kkrmr324
Kkrmr324 posted in Family Issues:
A few months ago,my friend Kendall died of cancer. It was really hard to "get over it"; because really you dont just get over it. One thing i did was find a bunch of pictures of me and Kendall and remembered all the fun we had together. And it helped! I still miss her, but good friends and family helped with that.
reply 6 days
Kkrmr324
Kkrmr324 posted in Family Issues:
A few months ago,my friend Kendall died of cancer. It was really hard to "get over it"; because really you dont just get over it. One thing i did was find a bunch of pictures of me and Kendall and remembered all the fun we had together. And it helped! I still miss her, but good friends and family helped with that.
reply 6 days
Tennis123
why are you allowing that to control your happiness? why can't you have true happiness instead of chasing some dream for momentary satisfaction? You're 12. This is when your core beliefs, values, and outlooks on life start. Don't mess it up choosing to be sad over something like that.
reply 7 days