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Dear Dish-It: Frenemies

Dear Dish-It,

I’m not sure who’s my friend and who’s my enemy at school. Some kids act nice when they want something from me, but as soon as I give it to them they go behind my back and start acting mean again.

MzSmartii

FrenemiesFrenemies
 

Dear MzSmartii,

I’m sorry to hear about your problems with friends at school. It’s pretty obvious, but real friends wouldn’t use you and then turn around and betray you. You’re right to feel confused about who you can trust as a friend and who you can’t. Here’s my advice.

Try Talking it Out

If you can, ask these so-called friends of yours why they are doing what they’re doing. If you think that talking to them will help, that’s probably the best thing to do. Tell them that you would like to be friends with them, but that you expect to be treated a certain way in return. But be careful: some “frenemies” may not be interested in hearing what you have to say at all. Sometimes, you have to figure out on your own who is worth having as a friend and who is not.

Find New Friends

If talking doesn’t work or you don’t think that it would make any difference, it may be time to find some new friends – people at school that you can really trust to treat you the way that you treat them. This may mean going outside your own classroom and joining some new after-school groups or teams to find new pals with interests similar to your own.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for MzSmartii? Leave your comment below!

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Ever Been Ditched By Your Friends?

  • Yeah, my friends ditch me all the time!
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  • No way! My friends would never ditch me.
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Dear Dish-It In The Forums

Ashleexo
Ashleexo posted in Family Issues:
I like both my parents the same but for different things.
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thrt105
thrt105 posted in Friends:
I have ALOT of friends. I used to have one BFF but she ditched me. After that, I couldn't trust people. I started making more friends so someone would be there for me and I would be there for them. Now, I don't have a BFF. Just a ton of close friends, which I like. But I don't know if I made the right choice of doubting everyone or not.
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Ashleexo
Ashleexo posted in Family Issues:
"thrt105" wrote:Yup. My Mom. She and my dad are exact opposites. My dad is innocent, soft, and so, so introverted. My Mom is super tough, strict, and extroverted. I'm like my mom and my brother is like my dad, but I can't talk back to my mom because it's rude, even if I wanted to. I will always love my family, though. no matter what. My parents used to be strict, but not anymore too much.  When I was in trouble, it was my mom I was afraid of to face but if I was going to get punished, i was afraid of them from my dad.
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