Dear Dish-It: Frenemies

Dear Dish-It,

I’m not sure who’s my friend and who’s my enemy at school. Some kids act nice when they want something from me, but as soon as I give it to them they go behind my back and start acting mean again.


Dear MzSmartii,

I’m sorry to hear about your problems with friends at school. It’s pretty obvious, but real friends wouldn’t use you and then turn around and betray you. You’re right to feel confused about who you can trust as a friend and who you can’t. Here’s my advice.

Try Talking it Out

If you can, ask these so-called friends of yours why they are doing what they’re doing. If you think that talking to them will help, that’s probably the best thing to do. Tell them that you would like to be friends with them, but that you expect to be treated a certain way in return. But be careful: some “frenemies” may not be interested in hearing what you have to say at all. Sometimes, you have to figure out on your own who is worth having as a friend and who is not.

Find New Friends

If talking doesn’t work or you don’t think that it would make any difference, it may be time to find some new friends – people at school that you can really trust to treat you the way that you treat them. This may mean going outside your own classroom and joining some new after-school groups or teams to find new pals with interests similar to your own.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for MzSmartii? Leave your comment below!

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

simran88 posted in Friends:
"donteatcarrots" wrote:they're not your friends if they want you to be something that you're not.^^^^^ this
reply 38 minutes
simran88 posted in Friends:
Tbh, your mom is kinda, you know, right about it. I mean, net is not as safe as we think it is. All I can tell you is that don't talk about her in front of your mom and don't give your friend any personal details about you. 
reply about 1 hour
simran88 posted in Friends:
I am sorry for what you are going through. I feel that it is time for you to find new friends - true friends. Try finding friends with same interests as you. You'll have more things to talk about that way. I hope things get better with you and your friends.
reply about 1 hour
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