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Dear Dish-It: Frenemies

Dear Dish-It,

I’m not sure who’s my friend and who’s my enemy at school. Some kids act nice when they want something from me, but as soon as I give it to them they go behind my back and start acting mean again.

MzSmartii

Dear MzSmartii,

I’m sorry to hear about your problems with friends at school. It’s pretty obvious, but real friends wouldn’t use you and then turn around and betray you. You’re right to feel confused about who you can trust as a friend and who you can’t. Here’s my advice.

Try Talking it Out

If you can, ask these so-called friends of yours why they are doing what they’re doing. If you think that talking to them will help, that’s probably the best thing to do. Tell them that you would like to be friends with them, but that you expect to be treated a certain way in return. But be careful: some “frenemies” may not be interested in hearing what you have to say at all. Sometimes, you have to figure out on your own who is worth having as a friend and who is not.

Find New Friends

If talking doesn’t work or you don’t think that it would make any difference, it may be time to find some new friends – people at school that you can really trust to treat you the way that you treat them. This may mean going outside your own classroom and joining some new after-school groups or teams to find new pals with interests similar to your own.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for MzSmartii? Leave your comment below!

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Comments

bbling

bbling wrote:

i fell ya almost everyone in my school are traitors.its everyone for themself
commented: Sun Nov 10, 2013

scalysunshine

scalysunshine wrote:

True that sister ; |
commented: Thu Oct 17, 2013

2kitty22

2kitty22 wrote:

true friends are hard to find now a days
commented: Sat Sep 14, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

scarlet177
scarlet177 posted in Friends:
According 2 me..... a perfect friend should be..... kind towards all, loving, funny, helping, and some times silly ( a friend shounldn't be ALWAYS serious!) friendly ( of course ), and..................... AWESOME!!!! :D !! I do have friend with all these qualities..... her name is ******  and she has ALL these qualities!!!!!!!! so she is AWESOME, COOL AND A PERFECT FRIEND!! :D :)
reply 3 minutes
scarlet177
scarlet177 posted in Friends:
My BFF is awesome!!!!!!! I know that cuz, she is the only person whon can understand my feelings when my enemies or some other friends tease me badly or when those ppl be rude to me....... :(  . I can share all my secrets to her........ she is Awesome cuz, she is being herself . Her name is ****** ....... and she is my WORLD'S BEST FRIEND!!!!! :D
reply 12 minutes
HeilHitler
it seems ;like my family is not getting along throughout all the killing going on around us. my wife gets mad at me when i come home with the jews i caught and i kill them in front of her and she gets all butthurt and my stupid mistakes of kids cry and scream
reply about 9 hours
Alexis7343
Alexis7343 posted in Friends:
I think its really great you posted this, cause a lot of people need it. Adults don't notice children problems. When I was in 2ed grade i was bullied by teens that were like 16. Not only that, teachers can bully kids too. My mom always puts people who try to kill them selves down in awful ways. Every time she says that stuff I am very offended by it cause she knows I have emotional problems but she still like to dig into it. Someone who feels they need to kill themselves needs someone to trust and talk to. I'm so happy you posted this. Cause it is so true!
reply about 10 hours
GaaraOfTheSand
GaaraOfTheSand posted in Friends:
I GONNA go draw
reply about 10 hours

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