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Dear Dish-It: Frenemies

Dear Dish-It,

I’m not sure who’s my friend and who’s my enemy at school. Some kids act nice when they want something from me, but as soon as I give it to them they go behind my back and start acting mean again.

MzSmartii

Dear MzSmartii,

I’m sorry to hear about your problems with friends at school. It’s pretty obvious, but real friends wouldn’t use you and then turn around and betray you. You’re right to feel confused about who you can trust as a friend and who you can’t. Here’s my advice.

Try Talking it Out

If you can, ask these so-called friends of yours why they are doing what they’re doing. If you think that talking to them will help, that’s probably the best thing to do. Tell them that you would like to be friends with them, but that you expect to be treated a certain way in return. But be careful: some “frenemies” may not be interested in hearing what you have to say at all. Sometimes, you have to figure out on your own who is worth having as a friend and who is not.

Find New Friends

If talking doesn’t work or you don’t think that it would make any difference, it may be time to find some new friends – people at school that you can really trust to treat you the way that you treat them. This may mean going outside your own classroom and joining some new after-school groups or teams to find new pals with interests similar to your own.

Have Your Say

Has this ever happened to you? Got any good advice for MzSmartii? Leave your comment below!

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Comments

bbling

bbling wrote:

i fell ya almost everyone in my school are traitors.its everyone for themself
commented: Sun Nov 10, 2013

scalysunshine

scalysunshine wrote:

True that sister ; |
commented: Thu Oct 17, 2013

2kitty22

2kitty22 wrote:

true friends are hard to find now a days
commented: Sat Sep 14, 2013

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Dear Dish-It in the forums

AlphaT
AlphaT posted in Friends:
The fact that this girl has a crush on you is enough for me to say...stick with the friend.
reply about 7 hours
american_brit
american_brit posted in Friends:
Nope. Not at all... It's just... too hard, ya know? XD
reply about 9 hours
Boysrock50
Boysrock50 posted in Friends:
"american_brit" wrote: "Boysrock50" wrote: Mate, just.. LET HER GO, LET HER GO, DON'T TALK TO HER ANYMORE LET HER GO, LET HER GO, IT IS HER YOU MUST IGNORE YOU SHOULDN'T CARE, WHAT SHE HAS TO SAY, YOU SHOULD JUST MOVE ON, YOUR FRIEND IS MORE IMPORTANT ANYWAY Nailed it XD Beautiful. All that friendship, compassion, mild rejection... poured out  into one song. Amazing. Tear jerker right there! *sobs* Okay... now that I'm done be extremely melodramatic, I agree 100% with what has been said. Loyalty to your friend is definitely what's best in the situation -and you've seem to be following through on this. Good. Now... can you just leave the girl alone? It might be better if you just ignore her.  thankyou, thankyou :P can you guess where my inspiration was from? :D
reply about 9 hours
american_brit
american_brit posted in Friends:
"Boysrock50" wrote: Mate, just.. LET HER GO, LET HER GO, DON'T TALK TO HER ANYMORE LET HER GO, LET HER GO, IT IS HER YOU MUST IGNORE YOU SHOULDN'T CARE, WHAT SHE HAS TO SAY, YOU SHOULD JUST MOVE ON, YOUR FRIEND IS MORE IMPORTANT ANYWAY Nailed it XD Beautiful. All that friendship, compassion, mild rejection... poured out  into one song. Amazing. Tear jerker right there! *sobs* Okay... now that I'm done be extremely melodramatic, I agree 100% with what has been said. Loyalty to your friend is definitely what's best in the situation -and you've seem to be following through on this. Good. Now... can you just leave the girl alone? It might be better if you just ignore her. 
reply about 9 hours
Boysrock50
Boysrock50 posted in Friends:
Mate, just.. LET HER GO, LET HER GO, DON'T TALK TO HER ANYMORE LET HER GO, LET HER GO, IT IS HER YOU MUST IGNORE YOU SHOULDN'T CARE, WHAT SHE HAS TO SAY, YOU SHOULD JUST MOVE ON, YOUR FRIEND IS MORE IMPORTANT ANYWAY Nailed it XD
reply about 10 hours

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